]]]]]]]] ]]]]]]] ]]]]]]] ]] ]] ]]]]]]]] ]] ]] ]] ] ]] ]] ]] ] ]]] ]]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ] ] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]]]] ]] ] ]] ]] ]]]]] ]] ]] ]] ]]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ] ]] ]] ] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]]]]]]]] ]]]]]]] ]]]]]] ]] ]] ]]]]]]]] ]] ]] ]]]]]]]] ]]]]]]]] ]]]]]]] ]]]]]] ]]]]]]]] ]]]]]]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]]]]]] ]]] ]] ]]]]]] ]] ]]]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ] ]] ]]]]]]]] ]]]]]]]] ]]]]]]] ]] ]] ]]]]]]]] ]]]]]] AUGUST, 1995 (Issue # 3) ============================================================================ DJ Johnson.........................Taker of the heat for this Cai Campbell.......................Graphic layout god & writist coLeSLAw...........................Art, poetry & cool name Louise Johnson.....................Picky person with red pen James Andrews......................Member of columnist party Scott Wedel........................Writer not popular with MTV execs Hunter S. Thompson.................Not involved. Ha! Made ya look! With contributions from Steven Leith, Lisa Peppan, J.C. Hendee, Alan Wright, and this really trippin' guy we've never met named Magthorn who sends us stuff in e-mail that blows our minds. =========================================================================== AUGUST, 1995 T A B L E O F C O N T E N T S * MEET THE BASEMENT BRATS - Interviewed for the first time in an American publication, singer and spokesman Ole "Magnum" Olsen discusses the Norwegian music scene and The Basement Brats' place in it. * WHAT'S BLACK AND WHITE AND DIFFERENT ALL OVER? - According to Scott Wedel, the answer is MTV's censorship policies. Is there one set of rules for black performers and another set for whites? * THE ONLY SHOW IN TOWN - The true story of what happened when two young men tried to stage a punk concert in a small town. * REVIEWS - Records a'plenty, reviewed by Cai Campbell, DJ Johnson, Alan Wright, coLeSLAw and Scott Wedel. * A SYMBOLIC GESTURE - Political writer Steven Leith explains how the GOP is gaining ground without talking about the real issues. * YO' MAMA! - Mother Jones is a magazine that educates. It exposes those who abuse power. It clears up confusing issues. And it's online. Cosmik Debris introduces you to one of the net's greatest resources. * THE DEBRIS FIELD - Our new monthly feature. Just call it "Stuff." Poems by coLeSLAw, Lisa Peppan and J.C. Hendee, a collection of Spam Haiku, and a mind-trip, courtesy of Magthorn. * URBANIA - This month, James Andrews, armed with a web-browser, goes looking for all that juicy hot pornography the media and politicians are always going on about. * SHARP POINTED STICK AWARD - DJ Johnson christens his new column. The first award winner? Some poor schmuck who apparently couldn't tell an ass from a...well, you'll see. ============================================================================ E D I T O R ' S N O T E S Welcome to issue number three. This is our first issue with our new spelling, "Cosmik Debris." As you may remember, we found out there was a sci-fi/fantasy fiction anthology zine called Cosmic Debris, and we made the switch. That's fine with us, too, because this is the way Frank Zappa spelled it in the song that inspired this name. And so, we happily welcome you to Cosmik Debris. I want to thank the dozen of you who sent e-mail about our last issue. We had hoped for more feedback, considering it was read by hundreds of people, but the twelve responses we DID get were very encouraging. Those people all got our point. Well, actually, eleven of them got it, one of them just wanted to know if we were going to interview Frank Zappa soon. I'll count him as a "probably didn't get it." Subscription requests shot up quickly after that issue, though, and no cancellations came in, so I'm going to boldly assume that most people got it. What we want to know now is... did you DO anything about it? Did you register to vote? Or link up to Project Vote Smart and start looking up voting records of your senators and congress reps? Did you do some reading at Mother Jones Interactive? We hope so. That's what we did it for. PLEASE take the time to drop us a quick message at moonbaby@serv.net and let us know what you did about it. Onward. This month, we take you to Halden, Norway, to meet a great melodic punk band. The Basement Brats have the distinction of making the last vinyl record in Norway. Now, on the eve of the release of their "Curse Of The Basement Brats" CD, lead singer Ole "Magnum" Olson talks about their music and the scene they live and play in. There are two major changes to mention this month. First, the poetry section has been swallowed up by "The Debris Field." We wanted to bring you poetry and random bits of weirdness in the same place, so we did. The second thing is that we've expanded the review section. Alan Wright has done all the reviews until now, but Alan has his own project going on, which we will give you the details of as soon as they are available. So Cai Campbell, coLeSLAw, Scott Wedell and Yours Truly have all jumped in and joined the fun. As I've said before, we're not strictly a punk or surf magazine, so don't be shocked to find a review of Pink Floyd next to a review of Los Hornets. We hope you enjoy the diversity. That's about all I can say that the table of contents can't say better. Enjoy. - DJ Johnson --------------------------------------------------------------------------- ___|\_______|________|_______________________O__________@____________ |___|/_______|________|_|___|__________|__@__|_____@__|_|____O._______|| |__/|____4___|__O_____|_|___|__O.______|_|@__|____|___|_|___|O.______o|| |_(_/^\__4__@|_|_____@__|___|_|________|_|@__|____|___|_|___|________o|| |__\|/'_____@__|________|__@|_|________|_|________|___|_____|_________|| d | @ | | =========================================================================== M E E T T H E B A S E M E N T B R A T S Norway has many well kept musical secrets. Among them, The Kwyet Kings, The Yum Yums...and The Basement Brats. Ole "Magnum" Olsen discusses the scene, the band, and life as a Norwegian punker. Interviewed by DJ Johnson. * * * * I wonder how many fantastic punk bands are out there in Europe, and elsewhere, that have never been heard by Americans. Norway, for example. I had no idea there was such a great scene there. The Yum Yums and The Kwyet Kings, certainly, have what it takes to make it in this country. Melodic punk influenced by British invasion bands like The Beatles and The Kinks, but powered by the punk influences of the 70's. The Basement Brats, from Halden, Norway, are up there with the best of the Norwegian bands. They have a natural energy in their playing, favoring balls-out melodic punk draped with their trademark wall-of-sound. Now, with the lineup of Ole "Magnum" Olsen (Vocals), Egil "Pineapple" Pinas (Guitar & Vocals), Nils "Nuthead" Olsen (Guitar & Vocals), Ulf "R.C. Rasken" Larsen (Bass & Vocals) and Mads "Bratman" Husvik (Drums), The Brats prepare for their third release, "Curse Of The Brats," on the Japanese label 1+2 Records (who has arranged American distribution through Get Hip Records) in August. The CD-only release contains 25 tracks, 16 of which were previously released on the first two Brats records, the 7 inch "Blast Off" EP and the mini LP "Tales From The Basement." The remaining 9 tracks are new or previously unreleased gems. We wanted to be the first American zine to interview The Basement Brats. Lead singer and band spokesman Ole "Magnum" Olsen was kind enough to oblige. --------------------- CD: Tell us about 1990 in Halden, Norway. What was the music scene at the time? Magnum: Not very exciting, really... About ten years earlier, around 1980, Halden - which is just a little town, really, of about 30,000 people - got a reputation as Norway's "rock'n'roll city number one", sort of. This was both because of good Halden bands at the time, like Front Page, the Young Lords and Saturday Cowboys, who gained a bit of popularity country-wide, and also because Halden was, I think, the first Norwegian town in which the city provided the rock'n'roll community with an own house for bands to rehearse in. But later in the eighties, there was not a lot of exciting music coming out of Halden. When we formed the Brats in '90, and started rehearsing at "the Rock House", which that house was called, the rest of the house was occupied by more or less shitty pussy metal bands. Some good musicians there, but not a lot of good music. There were a couple of exciting bands at that time as well, most notably a band called Rovers, an eight man folk rock band, or "rock folk", as they called it, but they were definitely in a minority. In a cellar on the other side of the town, though, some skaters formed a punk rock band again - sometimes known as the Missing Loved Ones, sometimes as Hille Valla, and a whole lot of other names - and this started the snowball rolling again... CD: Has it changed much from '90 to now? Magnum: It's changed dramatically, I'd say. The Rock House is on hiatus at the moment. It had to be moved - not the house itself, of course, but the activities taking place in it, so to speak - and the city and the others responsible for that have been really slow in getting the new Rock House ready. But when we moved out of there last summer, there were none of those shitty heavy metal bands left, and quite a few young, exciting bands in their place. As I said, the Missing Loved Ones really started the snowball rolling - they were the pioneers, sort of, and probably inspired other people who were also fed up with boring heavy metal to start playing some energetic rock'n'roll again. And then WE started, without any direct connection to them, at about the same time, playing more rough, simple rock'n'roll. And then we've had some success, sort of, with a couple of releases and really a lot of attention, world wide, even, for a band of our genre, and that was an inspiration for some as well, I believe. And now there's a lot of good music around here, of all kinds. There's a band called Poppets - we rehearse at the same place as they do, by the way, at the place of a mate of ours who usually cranks up his stereo so loud that the neighbours don't hear the difference when there's a band playing in his living room instead of his stereo. And there's a couple of bands with, among others, old Missing Loved Ones and Basement Brats members - Chinese Saxophones and Burnouts. All of these are of the...rougher variety, more or less. And Rovers are still going strong - better than ever, but unfortunately without a record contract at the moment. Hair of the Dog is a good country/roots band with a couple of Rovers members thrown in for good measure. Cornflakes, who by the way just got a contract with Norwegian Polygram a couple of weeks ago, is a pop group, I'd say, with members taken from some of those old, crappy heavy metal things. And there are even a couple of promising all-girls bands. So all in all, I'd say things look a lot better now than they did five years ago. CD: Who influenced the sound and the writers in the band? Magnum: Well, if you look at the name of the band, you might guess that the Ramones have definitely had something to do with it. Without the Ramones, there would never have been a Basement Brats. But the same can really be said about the Devil Dogs, 'cause it was after seeing a show with them, in Halden, in May '91, that we finally really saw the light and started playing a "surf punk" kind of music. We were due to support the Devil Dogs the next time they played Norway, by the way, but then they broke up... Apart from those two big shining stars, there are numerous other influences... I guess about everything we've been listening to up through our lives has influenced us more or less. I could list up a lot... like the Sonics, the Beach Boys, the Stooges, Johnny Thunders... Motorhead, even... and of course the Norwegian garage 60's scene. Our "guardian angel", sort of, Arne Thelin, who released our first record, landed the deals for the others and got us into touch with about everybody we know... he seems to have had a lot to do with that, with bands like the Cosmic Dropouts, the Lust-O-Rama and the Kwyet Kings. We're not trying to copy anything, though, the way we play or the way we write or anything. When I write lyrics, for instance, I'm influenced by even music that doesn't really have much to do with the kind of music WE play, but which I've been listening to a lot myself - like Simon and/or Garfunkel and Frank Zappa. It may not be visible to anyone other than me, though... CD: Egil's song, "Fed Up," may be the only song ever to talk about Christmas AND have a line like "Hey, girl, I don't need your fucking cunt!" Do you ever feel the effects of censorship there? Magnum: Not yet, anyway. We haven't played in any English speaking countries yet, though. If we ever get big, they'll probably put the idiotic "parental warning" label on our albums... Despite that one line, you'll notice that there's not really a lot of swearing in our lyrics. Personally, I think I've only used swear words in my lyrics once or twice, when I felt there was really no way around it if I wanted to be able to say what I wanted to say. That's not because I'm afraid of being censored or anything, though... rather because I haven't found it necessary. We're not the Sex Pistols, you know... I'm really glad we don't live in the States... If the bloody CDA (Ed. Note: Communications Decency Act) gets passed in the House, I guess the lyrics for "Fed Up" would be censored off our Web site... It's insane! Have you seen the list of the senators who voted in favor of that bloody thing? Did you notice that not ONE of them had an e-mail address? They don't know what the bloody fuck they're voting for! They're quite utterly clueless! And then bloody TIME jumps on the wagon with that "cyberporn" article, which by the way is based on a flawed report. sometimes I long back to the days, a couple of years ago, when it was possible to get into an FTP site almost any time you wanted, the AOL babies had to keep their "me too" posts on AOL and power hungry politicians who couldn't use a bloody word processor, and probably still can't, had never heard about it. Remind me to get one of those "The Internet is full - go away!" T-shirts... CD: But the Internet brings you new fans. People find your WWW site, get curious, and seek out your music. Wouldn't your wearing that shirt be a lot like Kurt Cobain saying "Fuck you for buying our records! We don't wanna be famous" while he was living in a mansion? Not on that scale, of course, but still biting the hand that feeds? Magnum: No, I don't mean it that way, it's just a personal thing, really, from a spoiled old-timer. Well, four years or so, anyway. Basically, I think it would be quite practical if EVERYBODY was connected to the Internet, 'cause then I could e-mail people instead of calling them. I hate phones... Anyway, the thing that irritates me the most is all the BBS's and other commercial online services, like the infamous America Online who have suddenly connected to the Internet without giving their users much information on what it's about and how it differs from a BBS - for instance that a simple news posting is taking up a lot of bandwidth while it's being sent to thousands of news servers around the world and taking up disk space on all of those servers afterwards, so you have to consider if what you have to say is worth that. I don't want to throw anyone out of the Internet, and I'm not the flaming type either, but I'd like educated users. A lot of people jump on the Internet bandwagon simply because it's presently trendy to do so. But of course, it's never so bad that's it's not good for anything. They might find the Basement Brats site... CD: ...And hear the cool music clips! Let's talk about your music. One of the things that I love about the Basement Brats is the simplicity of the lyrics. Good old fashioned rock and roll, with the occasional twist thrown in, like "And I'm Drunk - And I'm Pissed!" Or when you profess your love by declaring "That right now I don't care if I'm messing up my whole life." Magnum: That line about "and I'm drunk - and I'm pissed" in "My Baby Left Me" was originally going to be "and I'm drunk - and I'm stoned", but I feared censorship. (Laughs). "I'm In Love" is a very true story. Every line is true. And I knew I was messing my life up, but right then, I couldn't care less. Regarding our lyrics in general... I used to write more complicated lyrics in the old days, before we moved to a more punky kind of style, when I started writing more simple lyrics to sort of suit the music better. A lot of the time it's just old rock'n'roll cliches, which I nevertheless try to do my best to put together in a good fashion - but I really prefer to write about things I've experienced and felt myself - like "I'm In Love". I find that easier, too, than putting together a lot of cliches, and I'm usually a lot more pleased with the lyrics afterwards as well. That may be why I have never liked "Stay Away From My Girl" as much as some of the crowd seems to have. Egil (Pineas, Basement Brats guitarist) writes the lyrics to his own songs... I think he's more concerned, conciously or not, about making the words sound good melodically and fit well with the song than writing great poetry. Not to say that his lyrics aren't good. sometimes they're very good. sometimes they're quite funny. CD: Egil writes alone most of the time, is that right? Is there a competitive spirit for the band, healthy or otherwise? Magnum: No, I wouldn't say there's a competitive spirit, really... We just write songs when we feel like it. Egil writes alone because that's the way he likes to work, I guess. He comes to the rehearsals with a finished song or three - chords, riffs, lyrics, melody, solo and everything, usually - and we just have to spend a week or three learning to play and sing it. His songs aren't usually that difficult to play, really, although they're sometimes difficult to sing for my limited voice, but there's a lot of different stuff in them that you have to remember and get right. The other songs are sometimes done by individual members at home, and sometimes develop at a rehearsal from a riff or something that one guy starts playing and the others jump into. Then, if someone else hasn't already done the words, I tape the song at rehearsal and go home to write some lyrics to it. Or if I'm really inspired one day, I may sit down in a corner at rehearsal and jot something down. CD: What's the typical Basement Brats show like? In America, we have a tradition of tearing the concert hall down before the show's half over. Do you have any good riot stories? Magnum: No, I don't think so. People are usually quite well behaved. There's been some stage diving and stuff at times - which we rather like, really - but noone's torn the hall down. The most common story from a Basement Brats gig is us not getting paid. I don't really know how to describe "the typical Basement Brats show". It's us getting up on the stage playing some songs, putting up a show and Nils breaking some guitar strings... I think we do quite a good show now. We should, after five years of practice. CD: I'm guessing you and Nils played in other bands together. Magnum: You're wrong. We didn't play together until I "auditioned" with the Brats, about a week after the others had started up. The Basement Brats was Nils' first real band, although he had been playing a bit with some other guys at that time. Myself, I was the bass player in a band around '87/'88, when I was sixteen, and Nils was about thirteen and just learning to play the guitar. I was really supposed to be the singer there, but obviously I didn't sing too good at the time, so I had to learn to play the bass instead. After two years of singing along to Art Garfunkel records, my voice seemed to have improved somewhat, so the Brats never had another audition for a singer. (laughs). CD: How does the brother-bandmate thing work out for you guys? I'm sure you've heard about the brutal fist fights that Ray and Dave Davies had on those long Kinks tours. Magnum: There's been nothing of that, really. We don't see each other that much out of the band either, 'cause we live at different places and stuff, so we're really just mates. And it works out fine. We used to be two couples of brothers in the band, you know. Nils and I, and Ulf and his brother, Frank Kaare, who played lead guitar - and wrote most of the songs - before Egil. But he quit, because he didn't feel too comfortable in the band personally. So we got Egil instead, which has worked out excellently, and now there's only one brother-bandmate couple to worry about. CD: What's your insiders opinion of the Norwegian scene right now? Magnum: I don't know how much of an insider I am, but... well, there's some great stuff out there in our... "environment", so to speak, like the Kwyet Kings, the Yum Yums, the Abusers and others. We've never had anything to do with the big scene, the big record companies and the famous rock'n'roll stars. That is, famous is relatively speaking; famous in Norway, at least... So I'm just a listener there like everybody else. There's some good stuff, and of course a lot of shit, because, curiously, with the exception of the Beatles and some others, it always seems to be shit that sells the most. They may make more money than us and get more airplay in Norway than we do, but how many of them have been around for five years, are getting an album released in Japan, have sold forty percent of their last record in Spain and have been played regularly on a Chicago radio station? Few of them even have a Web site, ha ha! CD: The new CD begins with "Monster", which isn't credited to any of the Brats, but there's a line in there ABOUT the Brats. What's the story there? Magnum: "Monster" is a cover song, by one of those old Halden bands I mentioned earlier, Front Page, who were quite popular in Norway at the beginning of the eighties. "Monster" was one of their first singles, I believe. It's even included on a compilation album of old Norwegian punk rock which was released a couple of years ago, called "Anarki & Kaos" - which I suppose I don't have to translate - even though they were not exactly punk rock. They were very energetic, though, and of course a "result" of the punk rock period. We chose to start the CD with this song, not to cash in on their success or anything - I doubt many people remember them now anyway - but just because we thought it was a great opening track. Never mind the lyrics, though, they're completely wrong. I wasn't able to hear all that Morten Milde was singing on the original record, so I had to make up my own version of something that sounded approximately like it. The line about "the Brats were singing out of tune" is purposely wrong, though. It was originally "the birds..." A bit of self-irony there. (Laughs). CD: The Brats' collective writing talent seems to have a great pop sense, but always with an edge. Is that difficult to do sometimes, or is it just like "hey, this is how it comes out when we start playing"? I mean, a great melodic punk song like "End Of Time" could have been pure pop. Magnum: Isn't it? That's one of Egil's vocal numbers, and he's the great pop genius in the band. We others aren't that good at writing good pop tunes, so that's more straight rock'n'roll. But we don't specifically try to sound like anything in particular, it IS just the way it sounds when we start playing. That's probably why it DOESN'T sound like pure pop, 'cause it wouldn't be any good if we tried to make it sound like that. "Garage pop" I suppose you can call it. That was the headline in the local newspaper after our show here in town last weekend. CD: It's those songs that I notice the harmonies in the most. "Too Close" for instance. Are most of your harmonies overdubs of you singing with yourself, or one of the Brats? Magnum: Egil does most of the harmonies, with the others, mostly Ulf, doing bits here and there. It wouldn't be as good if I tried. Egil is really a better singer than I am. He's got a broader vocal range than I have, doesn't have the tendency to sing out of tune at times that I have... but they tell me that I've got a more powerful and "tougher" voice than he does, so I guess that's why they don't kick me out. Anyway, he sure does great harmonies! CD: Is "Big Burden" also a cover? Magnum: Yes, it's another cover of an old Halden band, the Young Lords, featuring classic Halden rocker Henning Kvitnes. We had been playing this song live for some time when Morten Henriksen of the Yum Yums, at a stop at a MacDonald's at Reperbahnen, Hamburg last year suggested that we record this and another old Halden song, and he'd release them as a single. So we learned "Monster" and recorded them, but they ended up on "Curse of the Brats" instead, since things seemed to take longer than expected with the single. There's a Brat line in this as well; "But I was such a spoiled young Brat" - originally "boy" - "didn't want no decent job". CD: I like the fact that you guys cover bands from your own country. When you break in the States, people are going to get curious about those bands. Magnum: "When" we break in the States!? Thanks... Anyway, I think they're gonna remain curious, 'cause it's almost impossible to get hold of those old records, even here in Norway. But if it should make people interested in checking out some newer Norwegian music, then that's great! I'm sure bands like the Kwyet Kings and the Yum Yums wouldn't mind that. And, if I may, I'd also like to recommend the Vikings, featuring a guy each from the Yum Yums, the Kwyet Kings and Turbonegro - plus Steve Baise from the Devil Dogs. They've released a couple of great singles so far and have an album on the way right about now. CD: "I'm In Love" has a dead-on perfect harp solo at the end. Who was that? Magnum: That harp solo is played by a mate of ours, Lars Ivar Borg. He's really a bass player - been playing for years - but he's a mean devil on the harp as well. He'd been to one rehearsal with us and played on the song once or twice - in other words, he'd barely heard it - went into the studio and did a fantastic harp solo. To everybody else, it would have been bought and sold that minute, but he wasn't quite pleased with it and did it once more, and it was even better. CD: "Sucker" is the only instrumental... well, almost instrumental. You did manage to get two words in there. Magnum: Yeah... It's more or less a rip-off from a Lust-O-Rama track called "Trasher" - originally written for a radio commercial for the pub where the drummer worked, Rockall in Oslo. The only vocals on "Trasher" are a scream and the words "Shake it!" so we put in a scream and a "Suck it!". Hm... do I smell censorship bait here? We haven't played "Sucker" very much, though. We used it once or twice as a kind of "Durango 95" intro to our shows, but it was more or less just recorded and put on the "Blast-Off" EP for laughs. CD: I was saving these questions... "C'mon Li'l Baby" seems to be about a 14 year old girl, and "Drivin' My Car" seems to be about reckless and drunk driving. Are the stories behind these anything we can legally print? Magnum: Depends on the CDA... Just kidding. Well, "C'mon Li'l Baby" - which is an old Kaare tune - is really about an old mate of ours who had - and still has, actually - a tendency to go for young ladies of about that age. "Drivin' My Car" wasn't really intended to be so much about reckless and drunk driving, although it may sound like it is. It was really written because we'd kept saying in interviews and elsewhere that we were singing about "the things that really mean something - girls and cars". But we didn't actually have any songs about cars - in fact, only two of the members of the band even have a driver's license - so we had to make one. So I wrote some lyrics, really about those people here in Halden, and there are far too many of them, who spend their weekends driving up and down the streets playing AC/DC or bad dance music on their car stereos which are worth three times as much as their cars. Myself, I'm cycling past them where they're parked at the marketplace, occupying two parking places each, on my way to the pub to have a few pints of lager... CD: Now that you've gotten exposure in Germany and Japan, have you got plans for America? Magnum: Uhm... We've never really had any plans at all, we've just taken things as they have come, and I guess that's what we'll continue to do. We're not really in a position to make much plans either, it depends on what people want to do FOR us, really. But we've gotten a couple of raving reviews for our first two records in Maximum Rock'n'Roll, and we got some responses from the States because of that. And, fortunately enough, 1+2 Records in Japan, who are releasing the "Curse of the Brats" CD, have a distribution agreement with Get Hip Records in the States, so it'll be possible to get the CD there for those interested. But if we're ever going to the States to play or anything depends on whether someone is willing to pay for it. But it's not like we're out of things to do just because we can't tour the States or anything. Just a few days ago, we got a new record contract with a Spanish record company, and we're gonna record that album within the next two months or so already. And early next year we'll tour Spain and France and make a live album in the process, so it looks like things are really rolling for this little band from a small town in Norway, a band which the pussy metal bands just laughed about a few years ago. (Interviewed by DJ Johnson) --------------------------------------------------------------------------- WHAT'S BLACK AND WHITE AND DIFFERENT ALL OVER? Answer? The two faces of MTV's censorship policy. Are there different rules for black and white artists? Scott Wedel points out a few things you might have missed. * * * * * You know, I really used to like MTV. I used to like it a LOT. I can remember times at my grandma's house way back in 1982 when I'd stay up all night long watching it. You see, grandma had cable, and we didn't - so I used to just love those weekends we'd spend at grandma's place. I'd stay up all night with the volume turned down real low so as not to wake anyone, and watch great masterpieces of video artistry like "Photograph" by Def Leppard. The VJs were fresh, witty, and attractive - and what they were saying didn't seem canned and commercial. Man, I loved those weekends. You know, now I really hate MTV. In fact, I prefer to refer to it nowadays as eMpTyV. It's empty, pure and simple - completely devoid of any social or intellectual value. I still watch it at times, but it's like having a bad taste in my mouth - until I change the channel to ESPN or some other equally insipid, canned, made-for-the-average-mid-American- citizen-with-the-intellectual-agility-of-a-small-soap-dish network. Another thing I really loathe (and that's far too mild a term) is racism. I firmly believe that it's what's between the ears that counts - and what's in the chest - and NOT the color of someone's skin, their sexuality, or any one of what seems like a thousand OTHER things that we humans discriminate against each other over. This is the reason that when I see eMpTyV practicing blatant racism, it just gets my blood boiling - and you gotta understand that I'm a very laid back kind of person. It takes a LOT to make me mad enough to speak up - and still more to make me write about it in an e-zine that's (hopefully) being distributed netwide. MTV is racist - plain and simple, with a double standard for black (especially rap) artists and white artists. But hey, don't take my word for it - consider the examples that follow. First, let's examine the censorship of rap videos. The best example I can think of is "Gin and Juice" by Snoop Doggy Dogg. Now, I like gangsta rap - if the grooves are excellent and well-thought out, even if I don't always agree with the lyrics. Bottom line is that it's excellent music to kick back to if you need to relax. (A little herb never hurts at the same time, but I digress.) Here are the lyrics to the chorus of the song: "Rollin down the street Smokin indo Sippin on gin and juice Laid back With my mind on my money and my money on my mind" (For those who may not be aware, "indo" is a reference to marijuana.) Now, those are the lyrics that are on the album. For the video, MTV forced Snoop to change "smokin indo" to "smokin smokin" (which COMPLETELY ruined the flow of the song - it's disjointed and makes no sense) - to ostensibly remove the marijuana reference because they "did not want to promote drug use". Right. A famous comedian - I think it was George Carlin - once said that everyone against drug use ought to take all their records, tapes, and CDs, and destroy them - since 95% of the really GOOD music is influenced by some sort of drug. (Ever noticed that all the bands in the laughable "Rock Against Drugs" SUCK??) There's a song called "Low," by Cracker, that was popular recently. The chorus of this song - the HOOK, mind you, that gets repeated over and over again - is: "Hey, hey, hey - like being stoned" Why didn't MTV censor this? Why didn't they force Cracker to completely change their song in order to get into that fabulous "heavy rotation" slot? It looks like racism to me. You can go one step further with Green Day. Some of the lyrics in "Longview" are "smoking my inspiration" and "I'm fucking stoned". Why, again, wasn't Green Day forced to remove these references from their song to get onto eMpTyV? Similar double standards exist when talking about guns. In every gangsta rap video you see, if you've heard the song from the original disc you'll notice that EVERY reference to guns is censored in the video - either blanked out entirely, or the lyrics changed (again, usually to the detriment of the flow of the song). Why, then, can Aerosmith get away with "Janie's Got A Gun"? Granted, the subject matter is different. In the Aerosmith video, the girl, being abused by her father, gets a gun, and blows him away. It's very much an "adult theme," however. Is a 10 year old kid going to be able to understand WHY Janie shot her dad? I doubt it. Cracker, Green Day, and Aerosmith are all white bands. Snoop is a black gangsta rapper. You be the judge. In my opinion, what happens for one artist should happen for all. Snoop is not the only gangsta rapper to be censored; Cracker, Green Day, and Aerosmith are not the only white bands to NOT be censored by MTV. Is it the image of the gangsta rapper - or is it his color? What about the image of the grunge rocker? Is it that different, when you get down to brass tacks? Sure, the gangsta's are carrying guns around, drinking 40 ounce beers, driving around in mid 60s cars with hydraulic switches - but then the grunge guys are walking around in dirty, ripped clothes, doing smack, killing themselves.... It seems to me both groups are setting similar examples. So why is it OK for the white groups to talk about smoking a fat spliff when the black groups are being censored? Ludicrous! What I'd really like to see is NO censorship whatsoever on ANY band. How about parents taking a little more active role in their childrens' upbringing - and hey, here's a concept - controlling what they watch on TV? If parents don't think their kids should be watching a Snoop Doggy Dogg video, then hey, why not turn off the damned TV when it comes on? My parents sure as hell did when I was growing up. Think about it the next time you turn on MTV and you'll see that it's true. Sit down and watch MTV for a couple of hours and you'll probably end up with the same sick feeling in the pit of your stomach that I get. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. - Scott Wedel --------------------------------------------------------------------------- T H E O N L Y S H O W I N T O W N (The story you're about to read is true. Only first names were used, and the town wasn't identified. In a case where concrete truth isn't always easy to prove, it's best to avoid the wrath of those with lawyers). * * * * "There ain't a lot that you can do in this town You just drive down to the lake and then you turn back around" - Steve Earle & The Dukes - "Someday" * * * * Mind numbing boredom has its own facial expression, but Norman Rockwell didn't choose to explore that aspect of small town living. The quest for "something to do" is approached with a touch of fatalism. On any other summer night, the youth of this town would be out looking for something to happen. Anything, really. Getting drunk, getting into a fight, getting laid. Anything's better than nothing. But "nothing" is what they're used to in this small town. Then one day this kid named Greg got sick of all that and decided to have a punk show. Greg is the town's only punk, or so he claims, but he'd been chipping away at his friends for years, sneaking some of the good stuff into their ears whenever he had the chance. Now he was going to show them what it was he'd been yelling about for so long. In a town where, as Greg puts it, "punk rock is still thought of as being either drunk mohawked Sex Pistols fans or Green Day," the idea of the show was still something great to these kids. It was something to do. Greg got five bands to come to his town. Breakwater, from Victoria, British Columbia, Canada. Nothing To Lose, also from Victoria (who are changing their name, but don't know to what). Refuge, from California. I Spy, from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. The Jack Trippers, from Bremerton, Washington. Nice lineup! Greg sold the bands on the idea of the show, arranged their lodging, took care of the timing of the show, and arranged for the concert hall. Greg's best friend, and co-conspirator, Cruiser, spent the better part of a week trying to find an insurance broker who would cover the show. The most reasonable deal he could find would still cost him an entire paycheck, but he decided it was too late to give up. They planned carefully, and all systems were go. But the best laid plans don't take into account people like Nancy. Nancy is a promoter, of sorts. She books events into one of the two halls in town, and the punk show was one of those events. Greg and Cruiser had every detail worked out. They went by the book, and the show was set. The kids of the town were primed and ready for something new and exciting. The older folks might have been a tad worried, though. Can't prove a word of this, you understand, but here's the sequence of events in any case. You draw your own conclusions. It's the week of the show. Suddenly, good ol' Nancy says she needs a list of people 19 years of age and older to work as security. Bouncers, you understand. Okay, fine. Short notice, but that's life. Greg and Cruiser went to work on the problem. Then, the day of the show, she changed the demand from "19 and over" to "Parents," and made it clear she was going to call them all to make sure they really WERE parents. Hmmm. You'd almost think there was a...well, no. Not gonna suggest it. This is a world where "consipiracy theorists" are burned at the stake. Nancy was probably anxious to help the guys bring this show off. But wait. The original deal included free set-up time in the hall, but come show day, Nancy suddenly demands 17 dollars an hour for that set-up time. How are Greg and Cruiser supposed to come up with the cash? Ask the kids in line to fork over more money than they had planned to? Yeah, there's an idea. Without getting into the technical subject of peer group dynamics, let me simply state that the human body requires more blood to maintain life than either of the guys would have had left after the crowd got through with them. Nancy must not have understood the difficulty of such a task, or surely she wouldn't have made that demand. After all, it put the show itself in serious jeopardy. She wouldn't do that. As the guys contemplated their next move, Nancy dropped another little bomb on their heads. She told them she had forgotten to inform the hall's maintenance man that there was a show that night. Seems there wasn't even enough time for him to get a crew together to work the show. Poor Nancy was having what we call a "bad brain day." She must have been heartsick when she realized this could prevent the show from happening. Oh well, what can you do? Shit happens. It also floats. As a matter of fact, a LOT of things were about to float to the surface. The Car Show really was a cold slap in the face. Imagine Greg's surprise when he saw people setting the hall up for that. A little bit of investigation turned up one juicy little bit of information: the hall had been booked far in advance by this other group of people. One of these good old boys was nice enough to clear things up for Greg. "You know, doncha, that you ain't gettin' in here." Yeah, he was starting to figure that out, but thanks for clarifying anyway, asshole. Wow, you know, that conspiracy theory is starting to sound pretty convincing. Especially when you throw in a few other little facts. * Nancy told a bunch of kids from the town that the reason the show was cancelled was simply because Greg and Cruiser hadn't paid for the hall. True enough. She hadn't told them they had to pay in advance. * The other booking seemed to go off without a hitch. Hmmm...what about the lack of a maintenance crew? Strange... Or maybe not so strange. Seems it was some sort of car show to benefit a youth organization that Nancy is heavily involved with. Mmmm. Okay. * When Greg got angry and told several of the waiting kids that Nancy had "screwed up the booking," word travelled back to Nancy. She called Cruiser the next morning and made some oblique threats, suggesting that he put a muzzle on his friend. There are some classic US versus THEM stories in the history of Rock and Roll. This might and might not be one of them. It's hard to tell. It could be that Nancy simply "screwed up," as Greg suggested, and instead of being honest about her mistake, threw obstacle after obstacle into the path of the show. If that's the case, she's simply guilty of being a lame- brained promoter with a fragile ego that she protects with scapegoats. The other possibility is that she shanked the whole punk ideal in the back, as a result of her own distaste for the form, or as a result of pressure from others in the town. Which one? I don't know for sure, but I DO think Nancy may have been behind the picket fence on the grassy knoll. I may not be the person to ask, as you can see. In the end, it was just another summer night in a small town. The lucky ones ended up getting laid...again. Or stoned...or drunk....again. The very very bored ones were happy to get into fights. Might as well, y'know. Nothing else was going to happen. - DJ Johnson --------------------------------------------------------------------------- ========================================================================== [[[[[[[[ [[[[[[ [[ [[ [[[[[ [[[[[[ [[ [[ [[[[[[ [[ [[ [ [[ [[ [ [ [[ [ [[ [[ [[[[[[[[ [[[[[[ [[ [[ [ [[[[[[ [[ [ [[ [[[[[ [[ [[ [ [[[ [ [ [[[ [[[ [[ [[ [[ [[[[[[ [ [[[[[ [[[[[[ [[ [[ [[[[[[ ========================================================================== * Across the spectrum of sound, from Pink Floyd to The Mummies * * * * * * * * * Pink Floyd - "Pulse" - Columbia CD So, I was in the record store searching for some new aural candy when, out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of a red flash. I blinked and turned my head to where the hallucination had emanated, and it happened again. I focused on a deep, brilliant blue CD long box and knew I had found the source of the red beacon. There was a flashing LED embedded in the box! How clever, I thought. Who could have produced such an intriguing cover? I read the title and almost lost my lunch. It was a brand new Pink Floyd release! What really took me by surprise (besides the flashing light) was the fact that I had heard absolutely nothing about a new release by my all- time favorite band. I practically giggled as I picked it up and examined the richly detailed cover. Then my heart sank as I saw that it was yet another double live CD. Just what we needed, I thought, another "Delicate Sound of Blunder!" As I pored over the song selection, I perked up, but only a little. They had chosen to cover a vast array of material from Pink Floyd's thirty year career. My primary criticism with "Delicate Sound of Thunder" was the fact that they chose not to play anything older than "Dark Side of the Moon." But here was this new release with "Astronomy Domine," a great song off their 1967 debut, "Piper at the Gates of Dawn!" Still, the song selection focused mainly on their two post- Waters releases. It smelled too much like another blatant attempt to milk the cash cow. But wait, that was just the first disc. The SECOND disk had "Dark Side of the Moon" in its entirety! Now, THAT was a ballsy move. I had to wonder, could they pull it off? My other main beef with "Delicate Sound of Thunder" was the fact that the performances were totally uninspired. I could only hope that this wouldn't be another uninspired wash. I figured there was only one way I was going to find out, so I plunked down my twenty-seven bones and walked away with my package, pulsing red all the way home. After taking the album out of the long box, I was delighted with the packaging of the CD case itself. It featured a thick, sturdy slip case holding a quality bound CD booklet, which held the two discs and featured twenty-one thick pages of stunning concert photos. The graphics on the slipcase and book cover are truly astounding. It is literally one of the most beautiful CD packages I have ever seen. This was starting to feel like something very special, yet still, I was hesitant. No matter how wonderful the package may be, all that mattered was the music. I listened to the second disc first. I just had to hear their treatment of the old classic, "Dark Side of the Moon." Was I ever surprised! The performance is tight, passionate, and inspired. I'd rate it right up there with their best performances of this work, and I have heard more than a few. The great thing about live recordings of "Dark Side of the Moon" (and many of their other works) was that they were always different. Pink Floyd approached each performance as if it were a work in progress, experimenting with different approaches to the same piece. This "older" Floyd does not attempt to explore the boundaries anymore, but are content to offer a sonically rich, professionally executed facsimile of the original. This is certainly not meant to be a criticism, because the piece is varied in that the extra players add dimension and life to the performance. The players on "Delicate Sound of Thunder" came off as nothing more than studio hacks earning their living plunking away for their bosses, but this time around it seems like a truly collaborative effort, where each individual comes shining through. The passion they put into their work is genuine and the quality of the work sparkles as a result. Disc one is delivered just as successfully, with an exquisite blend of songs from both recent and faded memories. The performance comes off as one seamless, exhilarating, thoroughly enjoyable ride. Performances of material off the recent "The Division Bell" seem to have been fine-tuned over the course of their tour, and as a result, are injected with a richness of life that seemed lacking from the studio release. In my book, Pink Floyd have been forgiven for their bloated, haphazard double live effort seven years ago. "Pulse" not only shows that Pink Floyd are alive and well as we approach the new millennia, but that they have renewed their commitment to their craft. I cannot thank them enough for that. - (Cai Campbell) Los Hornets - "Barrymore" b/w "Bloody Knuckles" (7 inch) IFA Records "Oh little Drew, you know we still love you You were our babe in toyland And ET's lover too Start a fire in my heart I saw it on the screen I know it wasn't all your fault I know you aren't that mean Oh little Drew...Look what they did to you All the money that you made your mom and daddy blew Straw up your nose and a bottle in your hand I know you did it all for me, and I will be your man" What else do you need to know about this song? Y'v gotcher twisted vocals and y'r psychotic guitar melody and a rhythm section that's just sloppy enough to make it all work. Then you have the lyric. "You were a slut in Poison Ivy. It gave me quite an itch. Sleep with me now baby. Be my evil bitch!" Move over Bob Dylan. These guys have no problem speaking their minds. The flip is called "Bloody Knuckles," and it's just some good old rock and roll instro. The vocalist, Slim, not wanting to be left out, put some of his trademark washboard playing on this track, as well as a few other percussion oddities, from the sound of it. This is a hopping little single all around. I saw Los Hornets at Crock Shock this year, and that's where I first heard "Barrymore." They had a ton of energy, and they had the crowd going, but I think the singer was a bit tipsy, and his washboard playing was kinda throwing everything off kilter. Here, he sounds sober, and it works. I recommend both the record and the live show. See 'em. - (DJ Johnson) The Statics - "Rat City" (Rip Off LP) The Statics have really come of age with this, their debut LP. Previous 7" releases were great, but lacking somewhat in identity. Shrugging off some of the Supercharger/Headcoats infatuation for this one, The Statics have become a fine Rock 'n' Roll band. It's not like they have abandoned their punk rock roots in favor of some new slick sound, either. They just sound more rockin'. New drummer Bryant really tightens up the sound, and they sound, well, rehearsed or something. It's still pretty raw sounding, as they did record it in mono on four tracks, but you don't need much more for these guys. You know, you can make almost all of the song titles into a continuous sentence to read: The Scourge of White Center comes to Rat City in Jerry's Red Camaro to Do The Russel Quan, and I Don't Know Why they're at The Police Station doing The Delridge Boogie for Burgers and Fries from Jellystone National Park so Take Me Out and Don't Mess With Us, Goodbye. Ha! - (Alan Wright) The Jon Spencer Blues Explosion - "Bellbottoms" b/w "Miss Elaine" Matador 7" single These guys just have a knack for awakening the amphetamine-driven beast that lays within us all. With their song, "Bellbottoms," they take their expertise one step farther (backwards) and succeed in rolling 70's funk, electric blues, Elvis' overindulgence, and acid-head freak-out flim-flam together with 90's retro-glam orchestrated weirdness into one big, fat doobie. One toke of this stuff and you'll enter a time warp without any exits. Whether that is a good or bad thing will be left up to you to decide. The flipside, "Miss Elaine," is not their best effort by far. It sounds like a drunken, psychotic bluesman trying to escape from the pits of hell. If you just want the one ass-kickin' song, this single is great, but if you are after more quality material from this great band, pick up their full-length CD, "Orange," which features this single. - (Cai Campbell) The Trashwomen - "Live! From Tom Guido's Purple Onion & Other Swinging Places" (Repent LP) The surf music revival is in full swing these days, and The Trashwomen would be on top of the heap, if they hadn't broken up already. After one 7" EP and an Estrus LP, the female trio cashed it in, but with this posthumous live LP and a further LP release of leftover studio sessions, there could be a reunion in the works. If they concentrate on the cool surf instros, they might just be totally enjoyable. Like their other LP, the vocal songs are pretty intolerable. I mean, their version of "King of the Surf," here titled "Queen of the Surf," almost makes Dick Dale's vocal original palatable! Actually, a couple of the vocal tunes on this, like their cover of The Milkshakes' "Pretty Baby" are okay, but when the Trashwomen break into that instro surf stuff like "Catwalk" and "Space Needle," with Elka Zolot showing off her true surf-guitar prowess, they really can cook. Due to the use of different venue live recordings, including some live on-the-radio material, sound quality varies, but is overall pretty good. I enjoyed the interview snippets where Trashwomen creator Michael Lucas tells of how he decided that "instead of chicks playing Trashmen covers, it should be uh...women. (laughing) I mean instead of guys playing Trashmen covers it should be chicks." Yeah, right. - (Alan Wright) The Kwyet Kings - "Don't Put Me Down" b/w "Self Important Girl" (7 incher, Get Hip Recordings) The Kwyet Kings are a Norweigan band in the same vein as The Basement Brats (See interview in this issue). This single leans toward the power- pop end of the spectrum, and it's pretty damned good. The A-side is "Don't Put Me Down," and the mix of influences is...well, fun...because it's such a thick mix. Beatles, Ramones, and a couple dozen 60's bands, including (okay okay, in my opinion...) The Monkees. The vocals, both lead and backing, are vintage 60's, which is a good thing, because the lyrics seem to jump right out of that era too. "You got me where you want me I'm hanging on a hook You are the only one for me Well I can't live another day without your love So hold me tight through the night It's the way it's meant to be" I know I'm harping on this 60's thing here, but it's just such a perfect example of retro-pop. Lead singer Arne Thelin wrote this one on his own, at least that's what it says here in small print. So Arne? Love the groovy tune. Peace, babe. Now on to side two... Uh oh. I must have put on side one again. Noooo...this is side two. "Self Important Girl." But it SOUNDS like "Don't Put Me Down." Okay, not exactly like it, but close enough to make me grab my guitar and check out the chord structures of both songs. Almost the same chords. There's that Monkees lead guitar sound again. Hmmm. It's not a bad song. This one is credited to Knut Schreiner, one of the guitarists. Wonder who wrote which first? Oh well, it's still a nice little retro-track. - (DJ Johnson) Live - "Throwing Copper" - 994 Radioactive Records CD - RARD-10997 Every once in a while I'll buy a CD that I've heard a couple of great songs from, expecting that the rest of the disc will probably be mediocre. I bought Live's "Throwing Copper" with this in mind, but, boy, was I surprised. Simply put, this is one of the most well put together albums I've heard in recent years. It's got great hooks, interesting and varied songs, and thoughtful lyrics - all performed with a raw abandonment that makes it hard to keep this CD out of the player. Live chose to start the disc off with "The Dam At Otter Creek". I agree with this choice as it shows just about all the facets of the band - soft, mellow sections with interesting melodies, and Edward Kowalczyk's powerful, descriptive lyrics, leading into sections where one can just picture them live on some small stage, beating their instruments with reckless abandon and giving everything to the performance of the song. The next two tracks, "I Alone" and "Iris", are the best cuts on the disc. "I Alone" contains their best hook, something you'll be humming to yourself for hours, even days, after you hear it for the first time. "Iris" has the most compelling chorus melody, and is the most interesting song on the CD. The first MTV single, "Lightning Crashes," is where Throwing Copper falls off a bit. It's a good song, entertaining - but a little bit too obviously commercial, though the story itself is quite compelling (indeed, based on a true story - Live, in the liner notes after the lyrics to this song, have listed a woman's name with her birth and death date; she was very young). The musicianship on this disc is very good; the drumming, in particular, is outstanding. In fact, Neil Peart has singled out Live's drummer, Chad Gracey, as (in his opinion) one of the best of the new crop of drummers. The only real problem I have with the disc is that there aren't enough lyrics - Kowalczyk is rather repetitive in some songs. It's not obtrusively annoying, though. Call it a pet peeve. The lyrics that ARE there are so good that I'd like to hear more of what he has to say. Overall, Throwing Copper is an outstanding CD, one that should put Live over the top, as it were, and entrench them in the alternative music scene for years to come. - (Scott Wedel) Steel Wool - "Lucky Boy" (eMpTy CD) Steel Wool are indeed "lucky boys" with their second full-length endeavor, because it's going to garner them some great reviews, and probably some new fans. Once again, this was recorded under the guidance of fifth member Phil "Cha Cha" Eck and boy, does it rock! There's walls upon walls of heavy fuzzy guitar wail to power most of the songs on this. There's weird short snippets of "songs," like "Skratch (sic) Your Ass and Bark at the Moon" which kicks off the CD before hurtling you into "Combine." Bluesy harp dominates "Candy Man," and "Flog That Horse" shows a downer, more melancholy side of the band. "60 Pound Wharf Rat" starts off like a surf song, then rapidly becomes something that sounds like The Cramps mixed with early Black Sabbath. This has quickly become one of the most frequent things to find itself in the CD player, it's that good. - (Alan Wright) The Goldentones - "Atlantis" (Bigmom CD) These guys play instrumental surf music that has much in common with Shadowy Men On A Shadowy Planet. Like that group, they take the basic surf sound and update it without it sounding lame. They also add elements of other musical stylings for variety's sake. Their first full-length CD, "Atmosphere," was a mostly surf-oriented affair, but on this one they expand a bit. Not that the surf element isn't still predominant on songs like "F-Forward," "Praying Mantis" and "Freestyle," but they mine a more rock territory with tunes like "Spitfire" in which they forgo the reverb for some harder-edged chords. "Departure" finds them in a moody, waltz-tempo mood with some shimmering guitar work. Being an instrumental band, they understand the importance of not fitting into one genre too much, and on this CD they do a fine job of proving that they can express themselves with just guitar, bass, drums and some fine tunes. - (Alan Wright) Johnny Webelo - "Johnny Webelo" - CD released by BANDS WE LIKE Lesbians, bullet-ridden adulterers, lemon candy, and the Treasury Department; what more do you want from a band, merit badges? The self-titled full-length debut album from the Webelos (Derek Horton, Ben Sharp, Sean Sippel, Bruce Wirth, and a handful of special guests) is solid proof that blue-grass is not dead. Hell, as far as the scouts here are concerned, it ain't even sick yet. Johnny Webelo (a fictional deranged boy-scout) is the brain-child of Derek Horton, the lead gutarist and vocalist. Heavily involved in the dramatic arts, Derek brings a flamboyant, other-worldly charm to the songs, using anything from blue-grass to psychotic circus music to Shakespearian poetry to tell his twisted tales of lost loves, cross-dressing, obesity, and other things that I haven't nearly figured out just yet. Sean Sippel has re-affirmed my faith in drummers as musicians, often using brushes rather than sticks to create some amazingly rich, jazzy textures. Ben Sharp (John Paul Jones' long lost brother) keeps the heartbeat thumping steadily along, throwing in the occasional vocal textures. Bruce Wirth lends his support on anything he can get his hands on, including lap steel guitar, organ, harmonium, thumb harp, accordian, violin, mandolin, and a bunch of other "in's". Musically, the album shines in its creativity, mockery, and beauty. The album features a generous 18 tracks, including a tasty cover of the Bob Willis and the Texas Playboys' tune "Gnu Grass" and their own infamous "Lesbian Sex Rave". This album I would classify as revolutionary in its power of resurrection for a style that never was fully given credit for its charm. Honor scouts?...maybe. Good band?...definitely. Released by "Bands We Like" contact: Jeff Stuhmer/ Peter Ramburg, P.O. Box 9499 Seattle, Wa. 98109 #BWL008 c&p 1995 - (coLeSLAw) The Cramps - "Flamejob" (Epitaph LP) After the somewhat disappointing "Look Mom, No Head" LP of a few years ago, those veritable inventors of kitsch-sleaze rock are back with a new studio LP. Faring so much better than the aforementioned due to a great new drummer named Harry Drumdini, Lux, Ivy and Slim Chance have bounced back with a very rocking record. "Flamejob," which in its initial vinyl pressing is on blood red wax (the CD version is on the Medicine label), features a PVC covered Ivy holding an acetylene torch (photo by Lux Interior). Preparing to do a little light welding, perhaps? From the opening chords of "Mean Machine," you know The Cramps are back on the right track, with a full, big "Crampsian sound." Abandoning slightly their obsession for the last few LPS with the 1950s/60s "sexploitation" themes, The Cramps instead are forging ahead into the world of "surrealist rock." Liberally sprinkled throughout this release are references to various Surrealist works, and they quote Man Ray on the record jacket. Songs such as the incredibly catchy and garage-rockin' "Nest of the Cuckoo Bird," "Naked Girl Falling Down The Stairs" and "Swing The Big Eyed Rabbit" are all based on Surrealist works of art and film. Salvador Dali, Marcell DuChamp and others are the inspiration behind great numbers such as those, but The Cramps add some of their own as well. Lux is an intelligent guy, and his lyrics reflect both a knowledge of and appreciation for the Surreal. That combined with some fine Rockabilly cum Garage-Punk attitude makes for some seriously catchy R.O.C.K. No Cramps release would be complete, of course, without some cover tunes thrown in for good measure. On this one they tackle "Route 66, " slowing it down to a bluesy drawl, and finally commit their excellent version of "Sinners" to wax. The other four covers are so obscure you'd be hard pressed to have heard the originals before, but The Cramps have always been ones to expose their listeners to their musicology. Espousing their unique brand of personal philosophy has always been important to The Cramps, and so this release includes a new anthem, "Let's Get Fucked Up," a crazed blast of raunchy guitar and howling vocal mayhem. Take that advice and get fucked up by this record NOW! - (Alan Wright) Mono Men - "Beer * Bowlin' * Booze * Broads" Estrus Bowling Leagues, Ltd. CD or 10" LP Who but the veritable Mono Men would release an album of songs recorded live in a bowling alley? To make the mix even more insane, add the fact that they were playing for a buddy's bachelor party. Oh yes, there were most definately Beer, Bowlin', Booze, and Broads, including a stripper by the name of Tammy "Boom-Boom" Mercedes. As if the Mono Men needed more than one of those reasons to cut loose! The kings of fuzzed-out balls-ahead garage rock waste no time in cutting loose and letting it all hang out. The guitars are thick, fast, and furious. The vocals drenched in sweat. The drums beg for mercy. Yet the mix is melodic and intoxicating. You can't help but shake your head and stomp your feet while listening to this gem! Mono Men fans will recognize most of the songs, but the festivities of the evening bring it all home in a manner that will leave you crying for more. The chatter is sparse and chummy, and when one beligerant onlooker demands, "just play the song," they not only comply, they blow the fucker down the alley and score a strike! In the words of our bachelor friend whom we can thank for this ride, "...crack open a six pack, lace up those bowlin' shoes, and turn that stereo up, pal. It's time for a little Strip & Bowl!" - (Cai Campbell) Thee Phantom 5ive - "Jump Start" b/w "Surf Party" (7 inch). Solamente Records. (On green vinyl) What's Creepshow-evil on the outside and Christian-Coalition-fanatical on the inside? The packaging of this seven incher from Tennessee natives Thee Phantom 5ive. The insert even decries mixed bathing. Woo woo! Ah, it's GOTTA be a joke, right? Side one is a nice medium tempo surf tune called "Jumpstart." It's a SHORT little puppy, at 1:49. About midway through the song, the drums go into overdrive, and a spaceship takes off right in the middle of your headphones. Niiiiice. I admit to being a sucker for cool sound effects in surf music. Hell, my music room is starting to look like a shrine to Man Or Astro-Man. But like that amazing band, these guys are damned good surf musicians. Side two is a cover of The Astronauts 1963 classic, "Surf Party." Now, purists are going to want to kill me for this, and I swear I'm a serious Astronauts fan...but I like this version better. Scores higher on the "kickin' butt meter." The lead guitarist has a bit of a Dick Dale influence (what surf guitarist doesn't?) and he uses that as opposed to copying the approach Bob Demmon used on the original. Nice single. I need to find more of their records. And by the way, what's with great surf bands coming from Tennessee? Impala and Thee Phantom 5ive. The Tennessee invasion begins. - (DJ Johnson) Various Artists - "Beyond The Beach" (Upstart CD) With the instrumental surf scene thriving as it is, what better way to celebrate than this CD compilation of instrumental rock. The thing that all these bands have in common is that they have at least one foot firmly placed in the surf. Some have both feet, actually. Jon and the Nightriders are perhaps one of the most "purist" in their surf sound, and doing "Depthcharge" drives the point home. Other bands take the surf sound and update it. Huevos Rancheros are represented by a track off of their C/Z CD, "Drive Through at Molly's Reach," showing off their Link Wray- meets-Ramones prowess. Estrus faves Man Or Astroman? turn in an incredibly blistering and raw version of their ode to race car driving, "Nitrous Burnout 2112." The feedback and fuzz in this one is most impressive! Fellow Estrus labelmates The Woggles also gain inclusion with their short "Flash Flood," certainly a worthy surf attempt. For the most part, this is really good. Excellent tracks from bands I'd not heard like Laika and the Cosmonauts (from Finland!), Spies Who Surf, Hillbilly Frankenstein, Southern Culture on the Skids, The Goldentones and even a contribution from original Belaires guitarist Paul Johnson! There's a few dogs in the mix, though: The Aquavelvets psuedo "lounge surf" song is terrible, and why the hell are Tin Machine on this? Their song sounds more like King Crimson than surf music! Program your CD player, leaving out the bad cuts, and you've got a swinging background beach party to dance to. (Upstart, PO Box 44-1418, W. Sommerville, MA 02144). - (Alan Wright) Gwen Mars - "Magnosheen" - Hollywood Records CD I have to squirm when a press kit for a band draws comparisons with Nirvana. It doesn't do much for my willingness to give the band half a chance. Not that I don't like Nirvana. I love Nirvana. I just don't care for those comparisons being drawn. Especially when they are not warranted. That's right, Gwen Mars is not Nirvana. Not even close. What Gwen Mars IS, however, is a band of three very talented musicians who seem to be desperately seeking their place in the corporate "scheme of things." If I had to draw comparisons, I'd say they lean more towards Soundgarden without Chris Cornell. Okay, their style goes well beyond the Soundgarden mold, but if I HAD to draw comparisons... Mike Thrasher is the mainstay of this group, and if his vocals DID sound like Chris Cornell's, he would at least be able to pull these otherwise enjoyable songs out of the mud. Thrasher's voice is electronically treated in such a way as to add an obnoxious vibrato to his singing throughout the entire CD. He seems to have a very good singing voice, so why he feels the need to drown it in a sea of electronic distortion is beyond me. He comes off sounding like a bad impression of Perry Farrell from Jane's Addiction. The effect worked for Farrell but it does nothing for Thrasher. This band has serious potential. The song-writing is solid, the talent is abundant, and the interplay between the three members works very well. All they need now is to be themselves. - (Cai Campbell) The Mummies - "Party at Steve's House" (Pin Up LP) "Tales From The Crypt" (no label LP) The Mummies, after numerous 7" releases (later compiled unto an Estrus LP), and one full-length LP (released simultaneously on Hangman in the U.K. and Telstar here in the U.S.), broke up. Then a funny thing happened. They got offers to tour Europe, and so they reformed. While they were in Europe, they cut an LP for the German Pin Up label, which despite its title is not really a live LP. What it is, in fact, is a studio recording with crowd noise overdubbed to give it that "fake live" sound, not unlike those "fake live" Kingsmen LPs that came out in the 1960s. As purveyors of a "northwest" style of garage rock, the cheesiness of this effect only helps to add to The Mummies' unique charms. Actually, for a band that has a reputation of being completely mental and out of control on stage, this record is pretty damn rockin' and even more "Frat Rock" sounding than previous releases. They do some great covers of songs like "Shake," "Big Boy Pete," and "Zip A Dee Doo Dah," plus demented originals like the hilariously titled "Don Galluci's Balls" (Don Galluci was the Kingsmen's first organist, and later leader of his own Don & The Goodtimes). The sound is a little thin, but there's more sax playing than usual, and it's a pretty good representative of The Mummies "sound." Somewhat more dubious is the "Tales From The Crypt" LP. With no label info or address, and a simple photocopied sleeve, this LP is rumored to be the rejected Crypt Records sessions that were never released because The Mummies apparently thought the result was "too produced." When no agreement could be reached regarding the recordings, The Mummies re-recorded what became the "Never Been Caught" LP (called "Fuck CDs" in the U.K.). Oddly enough, it's these recordings which really shine and show that The Mummies could really rock. Overproduced? Hardly, as this LP (also rumored to be available on CD, with extra live stuff!) kicks some serious butt! Despite the shortness of the LP (11 songs clocking in at under 30 minutes!), this one is well worth checking out for unreleased wonders like "F.U.C.K.," "She Don't Care" and "Wild Mutha." You may recognize their versions of Cannibal & The Headhunters' "Land of 1,000 Dances" and Roy Junior's "Victim Of Circumstances" from a Sympathy single a few years ago, but rest assured you're not gonna find the other stuff anywhere else. This is killer shit, babies, seek and find a copy by all means! - (Alan Wright) The Ramones Songbook As Played By The Nutley Brass - 7" on yellow vinyl. Vital Music Records. WAIT!!! WAIT!!! Where's my dad? I gotta get my dad to listen to this! When I was a kid, and The Beatles were my heroes, my dad HATED them. One of the greatest triumphs of my youth was the day my father told me they were hack songwriters, and "THIS is what good music sounds like!" By "THIS," he meant the elevator music coming from the wretched radio station he liked. (KSEA...Music to die by!) You've probably already figured out that the reason it was my triumph was that the song he was pointing out was none other than "Good Days Sunshine," by the Fabs. Of course, it was being performed by an orchestra, and you had to really listen to tell what it was, but the point is, I was able to say HA! to the old man. That was about 20 years ago. Before I discovered The Ramones. Now, I just gotta play this record for my dad. The Nutley Brass, it says here on the sleeve. Four Ramones classics. "Chinese Rock", "Gimme Gimme Shock Treatment", "Beat On The Brat" and "Havana Affair". ELEVATOR STYLE! Orchestrated instrumental versions of classic punk songs. You think I'm kidding, don't ya? Nope! And you haven't lived until you've heard the happy sounding pizzicato strings and chimes whirling above the tuba bass lines in ""Chinese Rock"". It's just so incredibly...happy!!! And so is "Gimme Gimme Shock Treatment". Oh, and you can imagine how fun it can be to listen to the happy little arrangement of "Beat On The Brat", can't you? It's fun because your father (or grandfather) will say "Now, THAT'S the way music was written in MY day!" Gabba Gabba GOTCHA! - (DJ Johnson) Armitage Shanks - "Takin' The Piss" (Damaged Goods LP) I'm glad that bands like The Armitage Shanks are keeping the spirit of 1977 punk alive. They're British, this was produced by Mr. Billy Childish, and they're really funny! Sounding like a bunch of '77 British punk combos, the Shanks are sometimes off-key, and completely out of control. You've got to love a band with a really British sounding and obnoxious singer who belts out lines like "I heard the other day/that she moved (indecipherable expletive) away/with some hippie guy/I'll kick him in the eye." Yow! Fans of bands like Thee Mighty Caesars, Headcoats, etc. will eat this stuff up because of great songs like "You Don't Destroy Me," "Primary School Punk" and the hilarious "Shirts Off." Plus they dedicate the platter to Jimi Hendrix! - (Alan Wright) Various Artists - "Johnny Hanson Presents Puck Rock, Vol. 1" (Wrong CD) Hockey is Canada's national sport. Okay, actually La Crosse is, but let's face it - no one plays La Crosse in Canada. Everyone grows up playing some Hockey at some point in their life when they grow up in Canada, and so Johnny Hanson of the legendary Hanson Brothers (a.k.a. NoMeansNo) decided to get a bunch of Canuck bands, and one Australian band, together to do songs about Hockey for this compilation. So what you get is a fairly silly but fun and sometimes rockin' CD of ridiculous odes to Hockey in a variety of different musical styles. For instance, there's Ramones-style punk from the aforementioned Hansons, balls-out Hardcore from SNFU, pop-punk from The Sweaters and garage-rock from The Smugglers. It's nice to see Toronto, Ontario's UIC back in action with their ode to on-the-ice scrapping, "(Do You) Wanna Go!!" and Jughead's hilarious Canadian send-up "The Hockey Song" with it's refrain "I play air hockey, ball hockey, barn hockey, bubble hockey, field hockey, floor hockey, ice hockey, road hockey....hockey all the time!" Geez, on what other compilation would you find Joey Shithead of DOA fame pairing up with the "cuddlecore" sound of Cub? Or Huevos Rancheros doing an instrumental tribute to Lorne "Gump" Worsley? Or an Australian band called Front End Loaders singing about Hockey? Only on this one, my friends, available from the fine folks at the all-Canadian made Wrong Records! (P.O. Box 3243, Vancouver, BC V6B 3Y4, Canada) - (Alan Wright) The Phantom Surfers - Orbitron 7" EP Estrus Records ES713R The Phantom Surfers are one of the hottest bands to cruise the instro surf circuit, and this new piece o' wax will show you why. It features five fat, reverb drenched numbers guaranteed to send you runnin' for the beach. All but one of the tunes clocks in at under two minutes, evoking images of a short but exhilerating shoot through the tunnel. The record label says to play this puppy at 33 1/3, but don't let that fool you or you'll be doing the morphine shuffle. Crank that baby up to 45 rpm and catch the wave to Endsville! If you are new to the retro-surf movement or are just plain curious, this is a great place to start. The Phantom Surfers ply their craft well, and this little package offers you a great taste of what the whole scene has to offer. So what are you waiting for? Go daddy, go! - (Cai Campbell) Impala - Kings Of The Strip (10" 8-song EP) Estrus Records - ES106 I'm listening to King Louie Stomp, Impala's purest rock and roll moment from their 10" release Kings Of The Strip. Sitting still during this song isn't as easy as I'd thought it would be. The feet just go. Right now, they've just slipped effortlessly into a hypnotically slow piece called "Nothing More Than Murder," which would be the perfect music for an old black and white private eye flick. John Stivers' haunting and slightly askew melody sticks with you, and in fact, three songs later, I'm still able to remember that odd melody. Even while I'm hearing and loving the next few songs. Stivers has a very cool sound in his head, and he's not too bad at translating that sound onto vinyl. "Incident On The 10th Floor" starts the show off with some good old fashioned muscle rock. The reverb starts to thicken with "The Hearse," and this is where Stivers starts to show his chops. "King Louie Stomp" is loaded with great Farfisa and sax work from Justin Thompson. Blutto woulda danced his ass off to this record. The above-mentioned "Nothing More Than Murder" closes side one on an ethereal note. Side two begins with the surf classic, "Penetration." The song suits them quite well. Heavy duty reverb lovers will freak out on this one. It's drowning in it. "Venus Flytrap" picks the energy up another notch, leaving the reverb setting at 10. Great riff, great keyboards. I love that old Farfisa organ sound, and this one is made for it. I'm assuming the guy behind this sound is Justin Thompson, though the liner notes do credit bassist Scott Bomar with some farfisa work. They just don't say which is which. Ah hell, who cares? Great Farfisa, whoever. "In Transit" uses the sax to create an unusual illusion of distortion in the song's undercurrent. Either that or my stereo's screwed up. And if it is, I don't wanna fix it, cuz this is a great sound. Slam bang bass and drum work by Mr. Bomar and Jeff Goggans, that great saxaphone current just above them in the mix, and more great Stivers riffs. "Epilogue," the closing song of the record, is a spy-music lovers wet dream. Great groove, provided courtesy of Goggans and Bomar. Of course, with some incredible surf-riffing by Stivers. But the real stars of this track are Justin Thompson (Sax, Farfisa organ, Guitar) and guest artist Chad Fowler (sax), both of whom are kick-butt sax players. The horn section is the thing on this track. The melody they play is first rate spy. The way their tones work together is great icing. There isn't a bum track on this EP. Fans of 'verb will love this...dragster rock fans will love this...instro-surf fans will love this...I can't imagine who wouldn't. Estrus really knows how to pick 'em. - (DJ Johnson) Roy Loney & the Longshots - "Full Grown Head" (Shake CD) Roy Loney is a legend to many. He spent the first eight years of his illustrious musical career as lead singer of the Flamin' Groovies, appearing on such classic LP's as "Flamingo" and "Teenage Head." After retiring for a few years, he came back with a new band, The Phantom Movers, releasing a few LPs in the late '70s and early '80s. In the last few years, we've seen him teaming up with various modern garage-rock groups, including New York's A- Bones for some righteous rock. This release, on a small Canadian indie label, finds Loney paired up with The Long Shots who are comprised of Scott McCaughey, Tad Hutchinson and Jim Sangster of The Young Fresh Fellows, and Joey Kline of The Squirrels. Loney couldn't have found a more able backing band for his brand of R & B and '60s influenced Rock 'n' Roll fodder, recorded at the infamous Egg Studios. For the most part, this CD rocks, only falling into a sort of sub-barband motif for a couple of songs. They play a few covers, such as the old Lulu hit "I'll Come Running" and a particularly rockin' version of "Tobacco Road." The title track of the CD is a fine testament to Loney coming "of age," and as if to pay homage to his past, the band finishes things up with an almost obligatory version of the Groovies' "Slow Death." - (Alan Wright) The Fall Outs - "Sleep" (Super Electro CD) With their original line-up now restored, The Fall-outs return with their third long-player, and their second for Super-Electro. Once again, Conrad Uno was at the helm and captures The Fall-outs' punky-pop sound better than before. This is the best Fall-outs release yet, and Dave Holmes, who sings and plays the guitar, has written some great songs for this one. The production is a little "punchier" on this one, too. "Zombie," and "I Wish You'd Come Back," both co-written by Holmes and drummer Dino Lencioni, are two stellar examples of the band's ultra-catchy garage rock sound. Bassist Shannon McConnell contributes "Spies," a fine throwback to the band's early days of modism. Those seeking some of the band's trademark fast pop-punk with scratchy guitar will surely enjoy the title track, "Sleep," and "Worthless." I should perhaps mention my personal favorite track, which is "Think of Something Else," a melancholy song for broken hearts everywhere. Also worth checking out is a 7" single release with "Sleep" and two outtakes from the same sessions, also available on Super Electro. - (Alan Wright) ============================================================================ ]]]]]]] ]]]]]] ] ]]]]] ]]]]] ]]]]] ]]]] ]]]] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ]]]]]]] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ] ]]]]]] ]]]]]] ]]]]] ] ]]]]] ]]]] ]]]] ============================================================================ A S Y M B O L I C G E S T U R E While the GOP is hypnotizing us with symbols, the real issues are being left for dead. * * * * * I would like to leap into the fray and harangue you about the utter nonsense the GOP is spouting, but I won't. Why? Because what they say and do is not as important as why they are believed. Any political party is comprised of people who share certain symbols. What the right wing has done with the Grand Old Party over the last several years is to expend a great deal of intellectual and economic capital to redefine the symbols of America's political landscape. Whoa! What the hell is this guy talking about. OK, lets back up. Politics works as an engine for society because politics is the art of using (and abusing) symbols. Without broad symbols to mute differences in individuals you can not build a majority or create consent. Couple the mechanism of politics to its goal of redistribution of material wealth and you have a general definition of the nation state. How that redistribution is handled varies from nation to nation, but the use of symbol to maintain the nation does not. The symbol of Louis the 14th as head of the state was replaced by the state of his severed head. The symbol of the crown was replaced, for a time, by the guillotine. But without these powerful symbols all the intellectual scribbling in the world would not sway masses of people one way or the other. It is the power of right wing opinion makers that they speak in symbols not in facts. It is a fact that symbols work on everyone. Humans rarely think in details. We think in symbols. The more abstract the symbol the easier it is to work with. We don't understand quantum mechanics, but we have a symbolic model of little ball-like atoms. That symbol lets us sleep at night secure in the knowledge that we won't phase through the mattress. Politics is just this sort of thing. The larger the group of people you want to attract to a political faction (party) the more abstract the symbol. That is why the flag is such an important symbol to government, especially governments that are losing the support of the governed. A flag is the most abstract political symbol around. It means nothing. Thus, it can mean anything. As long as you can link the symbol to what someone personally likes about a government, you can manipulate large masses of people. What are your symbols? Chances are they have changed over the last several years and that is the power and perversity of the post modern right wing. The media pundits and presidential hopefuls are eager to say that Americans are ready to turn the clock back to a time when our values (symbols) were more like the ones espoused by the Heritage Foundation. This is nonsense. The political symbols that mobilized a nation, and created one of the largest middle classes ever, are about as far from the current conservative dogma as one can get. Let's look at an old symbol that has been altered. The symbol of the freeman farmer as wise steward of the land, symbolized by amber waves of grain, blew away in the harsh winds of the dust-bowl and was replaced by the concept of managed use, symbolized by agencies like the Bureau of Land Management. The symbol has undergone another change in the crucible of right wing think tanks. The new and improved symbol has been taken up as a banner by agribusiness and resource extraction companies. The new symbol is: "Jobs can only be created by destruction of resources." The poster child for this symbol is the out-of-work logger. By equating jobs with resource depletion the old symbol has been transmuted from worthless lead to profitable gold. The symbol has about as much reality as the Alchemist dream of transmutation of base metals. Logic dictates that resource depletion eliminates jobs while it allows for a redistribution of wealth from the earth into the pockets of the exploiters. By redefining that one symbol the right has managed to negate all the logical arguments that can be mustered. You can not argue with a symbol. Regulations protect resources. Resource depletion creates jobs. Ergo, regulations are bad. Not just bad, evil. This bit of legerdemain is reinforced by a shift in the symbolic notion surrounding work itself. We once held that in a free society people should not be prevented from finding a job. They should have equal opportunity to prove their worth. Now they want us to believe the symbolic notion that if you can't find employment you are worthless. It is a subtle difference, but very important to the direction of the new conservative order. Personal value has shifted from the person to the job. Person is redefined as worker and citizen as consumer. The reason there is a rush to commercialize the Net is because they know the workers found there are good consumers. They have computers, the symbol of high order consumption. Other workers are not such good consumers for the very reason that their wages are kept low to enhance the salary of underpaid chief executive officers. The new symbol says that you are valueless if you don't contribute to the redistribution of wealth from the earth into the pockets of the upper 1 percent of this nation. To get some personal value you will do whatever it takes, even fish a river to extinction, graze grass lands into a dust bowl or poison the water table with cyanided run off from chip manufacture. It has never been easy to find prosperity, but one of this Nation's most enduring symbols is explained thus: "We had better all move up together or we won't move at all." That idea was reinforced when business practices in the late 1920s contributed to the great depression. The symbol had at its root solid economic truth. If workers are prosperous then businesses can prosper. Now that logical symbol has morphed into the cult of the entrepreneur and the glorification of personal greed. Prosperity is no longer a national ideal; it is a personal triumph. Are you on the winning side? The new symbol grows from the myth that every person can be an owner. Success in business is seen as the only real virtue. The fact that the kind of success the media likes to dwell on is about as common as winning the lottery is beside the point. We are talking symbol after all. As bad as this distortion is, it has a darker side. Witness what has happened to the venerable symbol of the Republican President Abe Lincoln emancipating the slaves. It has been replaced by the symbol of Willie Horton safely behind bars. We are asked to view prosperity in terms of us or them. Either I prosper or you do. In that world you had better be an owner, not a worker. Prosperity is no longer thought of as a national ideal. It is thought of as something that can only be attained at the expense of your neighbor or your customer. The frightfulness of the new right is not that their agenda is dangerous. This nation has seen a parade of ideas dangerous to freedom, equality and dignity, but generally those ideas have been revealed for what they were. In the new day of media manipulation old symbols can be hijacked. If we allow ourselves to adhere to symbols without demanding more, an Orwellian (war is peace, ignorance is knowledge) mind set will prevail. Can we demand more than the vague symbol of a sacred flag? Can we require an accounting of the real issues behind the symbol? If we can not, expect to see the nation slip further and further from the ideal of representational government to a reality of government by manufactured consent. - Steve Leith --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Y O ' M A M A ! Abusers of power beware! Mother Jones has you under surveillance. * * * * * "Listen to your mother!" Yeah yeah, okay. You heard it too many times growing up, and now here's this bozo in a zine saying it to you again. "Listen to your mother!" Why should you? Because your mother sees all. Everyone knows what a bitch it is to sneak anything past her. And she knows a lie when she hears it, and she'll tell you so. Well, your mom let go, finally, and now you're floating around this society of ours trying to figure out who you shouldn't drop the soap in front of. And if you're an active voter, you get to try to sort out the pros who should be cons. They're really GOOD liars. Who do you listen to? Listen to your mother. Mother Jones Magazine is a life raft in a sea of corruption. Let's see...how else can I put that...Mother Jones is a beacon in the foggy skies of American Pol...uh, no. Got it. Mother Jones takes no shit off of anybody. With so many of these criminals on the hill, being less than careful about how they carry out their personal agendas, it's nice to know Mother is there to spank them silly. And the thing that is most comforting is that Mother Jones doesn't seem to be playing favorites. Sure the magazine would have to be called "very liberal," in that they care about the human aspect more than the big business side of the coin, but they aren't afraid to take President Clinton to task for his infuriating habit of blowing with the prevailing wind. At the same time, they want YOU to know where Newt Gingrich got his campaign funds. And they tell you. Mother Jones Interactive is a very cool place. It's on the World Wide Web (what isn't?), and it is arguably the greatest single spot to graze on political knowledge. Current and back issues can be read online. With a browser, you get the entire magazine effect. Want to do some research into Newt's aforementioned financial helpers? The new "Mojo Wire," a great addition to the web site, has a spiff feature, "Coin Operated Congress," that has the contributors listed by state in 6 alphabetical files. Want to talk about the issues with other readers of the magazine? They have online chatting. We at Cosmik Debris are very jealous of that one. Shhh. Don't tell 'em. Online chatting on a WWW site. They're not the first, but it sure is a perfect fit. In just about a day's worth of browsing and reading, I managed to learn quite a lot about some of the people who make decisions that effect our lives. Jesse Helms, who many of you will remember as the uptight moron who seemed to want to put pants on the sculptures in the museums, has a very important job indeed. He's the head of the Foreign Affairs Committee. Now, in case you've never heard, Jesse is Rush Limbaugh's long lost twin. He's a master of the misdirection trick. You've seen magicians who make things disappear into thin air? Well, it's called "misdirection," and what they do is get you to look in another place while they make the switch. Jesse and Rush both do that. When Rush does it, a bunch of people, who seem to have wandered into the studio after a faith-healing taping let out in the NEXT studio, hoot and holler and make Rush richer. You can deal with that, because...so frickin what? We know that if Rush were at the bottom of the ocean, these people would just latch onto Pat Robertson. No big diff. But when JESSE does it, things happen. Or DON'T happen. Things that have an effect not only on the American people, but on the people of other countries. That's not a comforting thing to know. You need to know, so listen to your mother when she tells you the facts of politics. Many publications would say "Jesse Helms uses dirty tricks to get what he wants." Mother Jones gives you concrete examples, like when Helms, as chairman of the Foreign Relations Committee, interupted Dr. Sidney Weintraub, of The Center for Strategic and International Studies, right in the middle of his testimony in favor of bailing the Mexican government out with a 40 billion dollar loan. Helms says "Would you feel differently if you were informed that the president of Mexico has declared in a press conference yesterday and again this morning that he will accept no conditions on this loan?" That stopped Dr. Weintraub in his tracks. "No conditions of any kind," he asks? "Yes, sir," says Jesse. Weintraub was stuck. "If he would accept no conditions, then I would not support the loan." This made Jesse pretty happy. "Well, I think that is important. I am not saying he has." WHAT? Where the hell did that rabbit come from!? I was looking over there! Jesse Helms, as chair of that committee, abused his position. He made something up, got Dr. Weintraub to say what the Helms crowd wanted to hear, and then enjoyed watching him argue from a defensive posture for the rest of the afternoon. Mother Jones reported on it, and gave you that entire exchange (plus some) verbatim. Instead of making the accusation that Helms uses twisted truths and flat out lies to get what he wants, they let Helms tell you himself. Newt Gingrich can't fool Mother Jones for one second. They're on to him like Republicans on a social program. When Newt pushed through an obscure bill that just happened to be the pet project of the head of the ethics committee, Mother Jones was there to point out that congresswoman's sudden reluctance to investigate GOPAC, Gingrich's campaign contribution machine that deserves more than a little suspicion. In fact, Newt has been dissected to the bone in the pages of Mojo. Good thing, too, because his little brainwashing act on television might have too many people voting like zombies. The Contract With America is exposed by Mojo for what it is...a distraction from the real agenda. In recent months, Mother Jones has taken to task a great many public figures who keep the pork rolling in, but they've gone a step further and informed us of private parties who, as Mojo puts it, feed at the public trough. CEO's of mega-companies who use shady tax breaks at the expense of the lower classes. They've gone after corporations who abuse the campaign contribution laws to stuff the barrels for Newt and Company in return for favorable votes on their pet projects. They've educated us about medical insurance fraud (which has added 100 billion dollars to our national health bill), racism, mafia activity in the former Soviet Union, and the secrets to keeping your family together. It's hard to catagorize a magazine with such a wide variety of topics, but "watchdog" would have to be one of the prime candidates. If you're being naughty, Mojo will tell everybody. So if you want to find out who's been naughty and who's been nice before you go off to the polls next time around, I suggest you take a trip over to Mother Jones Interactive and do some studying. An uneducated voter is as dangerous as a person who doesn't even bother to vote. Maybe more so. The trick is to find sources that give you quotes to draw your own conclusions from. Mojo does that. And the writers present their findings in a no-nonsense way everyone can understand. Need more reasons to check into this? Okay, are you into checking out cool new WWW sites? GO! It's loaded with great features. If none of these reasons are enough to get you over there, here's one final fact. They have Paula Poundstone writing a monthly column for them, and yes, it is a very funny column. - DJ Johnson Mother Jones Interactive can be reached on the World Wide Web at http://www.mojones.com ============================================================================ ============================================================================ - % @ ]]]]]]]]]] . " ~ + . ]]] ]] ]] ]]]] , ^ . ]]] ]]]]] ]] < ]]] ]] ]] ]]]] & # ]]] ]] ]] ]] ! ^ | . """ "" "" """" ]]]]] ]]]] ]]]] ]]]]] ]]]]]] ]]]] - \ ~ ]] ]] ]] ] ] ]] ] ]] ] ` ? $ ]] ] ]]]] ]]]] ]] ]] ]] ]]] ~ ` ]] ]] ]] ] ] ]] ]] ]] ] l """"" """" """"" "" "" """" `"" ]]]]] ]]]]]] ]]]] ]] ]]]]] @ : ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] / + ]]]] ]] ]]]] ]] ]] ] | ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ]] ! : "" """" """" """"" """"" + . Random stuff for your entertainment. Happy scrolling! NEVER PAINTING never from the son of sky do crabs and fish recover my my penchant for some acrofusic metamorphic hateful lie and never does the jasper one inspire me to turn and run away from places cold with shame put there by the blazing sun never remember never forget never resolve never repent never enclose never expose never devour never i know never embers burn away they all remain as if to say do not confuse the here and now with then, tomorrow, yesterday never releasing never let go never unfolding never to grow never reborn never to die never to come from the son in the sky......... ............goodbye. - coLeSLAw A COLLECTION OF SPAM HAIKU Pink tender morsel, Glistening with salty gel. What the hell is it? Ears, snouts and innards, A homogenous mass. Pass another slice. Cube of cold pinkness Yellow specks of porcine fat. Give me a spork please. Old man seeks doctor. "I eat SPAM daily", says he. Angioplasty. Food in name only Lipo-suctioned from the can None for me, thank you Highly unnatural, The tortured shape of this "food": A small pink coffin. Sliding from the can Fully saturated fat Makes me want to retch *** Authors unknown *** JOURNAL, PAGE 1222 (Another day in the book) Dear Diary, Today's been most strange. The sun rose up in a purple haze to the west, While far out to sea a red sandstorm blew. I lit a cigarette and smoked my last match, Perched high atop a deep hole. Wide-eyed, I watched the day unfold, With my eyes clamped tightly shut. The trees grew down, The rain fell up into A cloudless sky of bright green. A million comets fell To the earth so hard, They made not a sound as they fell. My mind worked hard, As I lay comatose, Sitting tall in my hole. I snuffed out my match, And walked to the top of the mountain below. They're waiting Dear Diary Quietly shouting my name so loud. I must go to them now, But I'll leave you here beneath this tree, And in my pocket carry you with me to them Sincerely, yours truly, Dear Diary. copyright 1980 Lisa Peppan * * * * What I Got an abstract rave by Magthorn My name is Robert. Not Bob, not Rob, not Robbie. I'm not a software program that nobody needs to use to do things they don't need to do. I'm me and What I Got, You Got to Get It Put it in You. You pump today? Why not. Special agent couch potato - you? That stomach creeping over the belt. No way? Good. You watch yourself and only drink light beer. Hey, no prob with the pint of Haggen Daz - it's non-fat sorbet. Pell Mell read the Swell Maps and beat Vein Melter to the Wire using a Fad Gadget. Meanwhile, In Flagranto Delicto, The Hafler Trio ate A Thirsty Fish. But It's All Right Ma, We're just two lost souls living in a fish bowl, year after year. Everything you do is seen by someone. Every dime you spend contributes to the database. You're a demographic, Zippie. Snorted a ton of The Brady Bunch and shot up more Speed Racer than you could handle? No wonder your brain is fucked. You did the wrong generation, Zippie. Your folks never home and didn't give a shit when they were? Yeah, I know. They ALL claimed to be hippies. What did you expect? That they would admit they supported it? It's easy to change your past, just tell the future what YOU want it to know. Those history books you used to cover the popcorn bowl when you sneezed while dreaming about doing Marsha? That's all they were. History retold, reupholstered to fit the image. Hell, men have always respected women. Whites have always respected blacks. The red, white, and blue has always hated pink. Pink is communism. Pink is sex. America hates sex. Give us a good bloodbath any day but keep that tit covered and let your kid go hungry till you get home - bitch. When a monk asked, "What is the Buddha?" Ummon replied, "A shit-wiping stick." Ummon could say that in 900 ad. What is YOUR God, Zippie? There is no need to run outside For better seeing, . . . . . . Rather abide At the center of your being; For the more you leave it, the less you learn. Search your heart and see . . . The way to do is to be. What did you learn in school? How to flip hamburgers? Do you know what the Lao Tzu is? Or is it a who? Don't know? I Was Born in a Laundromat. No Sisters of Mercy saved me from the Floodland. I watched Pictures of Matchstick Men Cloudbusting. When the Levee Breaks I Shall Be Released. In My Time of Dying Fortune Presents Gifts Not According to the Book. O Freunde, nicht diese Tone! You bare your chest to accept the blackened needle. Are you more yourself for the pain? Is the message you will send the rest of your life going to always ring true? What you are now may bear little resemblance to what you will be. You may be the same as THEM. You may get religion. You may care more for money than for yourself. You may sit and force your kids to watch Greg and Marsha while telling them how relevant they still are. My name is Robert. I know who I am. Who are you? * * * * * ONEIROMANCER Wandering grey asphalt Twisted crevices Wet and genetic. Searching lost divinity On a path created by some "else." He asks you "Am I mortal, or bastard offspring Of some long forgotten god, demon... Of heaven, earth... Faith, science...?" Vision of the immediate says "neither." "Just flesh, nothing more," you lie. "Child and parent, Sibling, mate." "Is this enough?" he asks. His roots are known to you But so far removed and twisted Like dead grass, Crushed flat cracks At the roadside. He cannot see the initial spark Of origin. His words have affect... The straining of his hands Cause change... But for how long? Are those miracles Or illusions? You no longer have A need for a god When you become your own deceiver-- He'll dream his own world, His own beginning, His own end. As he has dreamt you... Whole and real, Long before His nightmares ride you... --J. C. Hendee FLOATILLA lemon dew drops kissed before the moon fell down in shame as pearls rained down the sky again in sheets of atom bombs the penny in the acid pool lies face down and around this time imagine what would happen if we gave it life again listen to the silence while the leaves fall down like dominoes and all the puppets dance and laugh while you tell a picture perfect story that you will have to share again before sun has set so sigh it won't get any slower and cry you'll just get wetter so try it couldn't hurt sigh and say goodbye to the small flotilla in the sky (c) 1995 coLeSLAw ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ATTENTION PLEASE Columns printed in Cosmik Debris contain the opinions of the individual writers. In other words, we, the wimpy quivering bunch of editors cowering in the corner & wetting ourselves in a shameless display of cowardice, take no responsibility for any of it. Not one single word. So don't try it, bud! It won't hold up in court! Now go away! GO! ---------------------------------- U R B A N I A Hello, fine readership! You may be proud of yours truly when you find out that I actually did...RESEARCH for this month's column! Now, I'm trusting that you won't tell DJ about this, as he is still operating under the belief that I'm not able to conduct research, due to a horrible injury I suffered as a librarian during the war. This month, folks, we're off in search of the much ballyhooed NEEEEWdity and general disgustivity on the World Wide Web. Oh, it was with the greatest of anticipation that I loaded up the trusty browser and headed down this, the road to sure ruin. To hear Good Ole Jesse Helms tell it, before I'd have a chance to avert my virgin gaze, I'd be watching Madam X boinking a boxer terrier. Alright, let's go. First off, we head to the trusty Web Crawler, since it was invented here in Seattle. BOUND to have a good nose fer smut, that Web Crawler. First entry...hmm...well, let's not beat around the bush here, type "NEKKID PEOPLE" in there 'n LET 'ER RIP!! YEEEEEHAAAAW!! Gawd, I can almost SMELL them pictures loading in here. Ok, so I've got the thingy on the widget set to return 25 documents, that oughtta keep me busy for awhile. Uh, as they load, we see a bunch of meaningless URL's (I never go anywhere that doesn't have a REAL title) and "NetBrat's Explicit Home Page." That sounds promising! Ok, as it loads up, nothing particularly nekkid scrolls across my screen. It starts off with the redundant message "This page looks best when viewed with Netscape." Well, I'm using Netscape and I don't see anything that strikes me as particularly unclothed yet (although, the word "explicit" in the title is blinking! God bless Netscape for the tag!) As I scroll through, I find a picture of an attractive, yet clothed, blonde woman, who I presume must be "NetBrat." AHA! Underneath the picture, it says "Click here to see a NEKKID picture of NetBrat." WOOOOOHOOOO!! With trembling fingers, I "click here" and wait for the ol' 9600 to pipe that beauty onto the screen. Oh, but wait. Instead of a naked picture, that wacky NetBrat has put, in a big ol' Level One Heading, the words "You Pervert!" and then a kind offer to return us to her home page! Oh, the irony! HA HA HA HA HA HA!! Oh, truly a brat you are, NetBrat. Well, as much as I would have liked to wander around in NetBrat's demesnes all day to see what OTHER naughty pranks she could stuff in her HTML, I had a column to write, dammit. So back to the Web Crawler. This time, I'd better be a little bit more "racy" (ooh, I feel naughty just SAYING it!) Alright, let's see what this baby brings back when I send it to fetch "HOT BABES." THE FREAKIN' MOTHERLODE!!!! YEAH! Ok, we got "The Pink Pages," we got one that just says "ADULTS," and we got a Gopher Menu, bound to be STUFFED with Hot Babes Galore. First stop, "The Pink Pages." That one sounds like an underground phone book for brothels. Has a nice ring to it. Hey, hey! The first thing we get is one of those "This page is for adults (wink, wink) so if you're NOT an adult, you better (wink, wink) turn around and go away. There is ADULT (wink, wink) content here, so if that offends you, or if you're not (wink, wink) old enough, GO AWAY!!" screens. Yeah! I tell the widget that I'm 25 years old and it pipes me off further down the screen (It's all on the same page! Do they think that someone who's under 18 can't use the scroll arrows? Oh well, I guess that's why they make adult material instead of joining that think tank down the block.) Now, HERE we go! There is a picture of two Hot Babes, both dolled up in that lacey-gartery-high-heely stuff, that stuff that all Sexy Women wear around the house while doing the things that French Maids do. Babe #1 has her leg propped seductively on Babe #2, and they're both looking seductively at the camera. Upon further inspection of the page, it turns out that they're waiting seductively at the other end of a 1-800 number, and they (or some of their "girlfriends") would like nothing more than to share their wildest fantasies with us. Well, I used to work at an answering service, and there were two women who worked there that used to work at a phone sex line. Uh, let's just say that I'm not really interested in knowing what their wildest fantasies are, especially if my name is used in a sentence with 'em. Alright, now frustration is setting in. I'm gonna try ONE MORE Web Crawl. Gotta be something good. Something sure-fire. Let's see...HERE WE GO! Ok, with surety and confidence, I tell the widget to go find "PEOPLE DOING IT." Now, if that don't get me a 'puter full o' porn, then there ain't none to be had here no-how. What the hell is THIS??? We've got "FREEDOM ASSOCIATES," which doesn't exactly conjure up the image of a couple of sweaty people in itself; we've got "At the Time of Jesus, The Truth about Hillel and his Times," uh, unless somehow that page backs up my Bible-as-porno-mag theory, which is doubtful, I'm going to assume there aren't any good pictures there; and finally, we have the "ORIGIN OF CHRISTIANITY and JUDAISM." Well, no shit. "People doing it" is pretty much the origin of the WHOLE FUCKING HUMAN RACE, dumbass. Well, Ok, to HELL with this. In my opinion, this whole debate started when Mrs. Helms walked in on the honorable Jesse Helms in the den and he had the latest delivery from the "Traci Lords" mailing list up on the screen, and when she got mad, he told her that he found it on a page called "For Kids Only" so now he's gotta put on a good show of indignation in the Senate so she'll believe him. So, to wrap this dead fish up, I'd say that the only REAL obscenity out there is whatever Sen. Jesse Helms utters on the job, and the only REAL pornography is what he does with Mrs. Helms with the lights out (eeew). Now, THAT'S disgusting. Well, I'll see y'all next month. For now, I'm off to the Circle K to pick up this month's issue of "Hooters on Harleys." - Jim Andrews ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- IT IT WEREN'T TRUE, WHO'D BELIEVE IT? This month's Sharp Pointed Stick Award, by DJ Johnson When I was a naive young man of 19, I met an older woman who made my toes shake. Our affair was brief and inconvenient. It seemed very difficult for her to find time for our encounters, and when she finally would come up with a time and place, there was a good chance something would happen in her life to make her cancel. Not wanting to BE naive, I said to her "Look, I can take a hint. Goodbye!" But she jumped me right then and there, so I was back on the ride. Came to find out, eventually, that she was married and had three children, and the reason for her scheduling troubles was that her husband was suspicious, jealous, and very very overdeveloped in the bicep regions. God, I felt stupid! I lived with that opinion of myself for a long time, but today I'm free. Because today's paper brings proof positive that I'm smarter than some. This guy in Bountiful, Utah, filed a missing persons report on his wife. Things worked out just swell. They found her. Only she was a he. Even though Bruce Jensen and Felix Urioste were married for three and a half years, Bruce never suspected that Felix was a man. Seems they had one sexual encounter, from which Felix claimed to have been impregnated with twins. I want to know how that encounter could happen without Bruce becoming suspicious. I also DON'T want to know that. Bruce did "the right thing," marrying Felix in a Mormon church. I'll spare you the forty or fifty jokes that started tap-dancing on my mind over that one! Felix told Bruce they couldn't have sex anymore due to the pregnancy. Bruce bought it. I'd make fun of him for that, too, but I have also fallen for the same line on a few occasions. Eventually, he told him the twins were stillborn. THEN he claimed to have developed cancer, saying he had to go away for treatment. There is no hard evidence to suggest Felix also told Bruce that if he stuck his tongue on the metal rack in the freezer, it would taste like a popcicle, but the chances are good he pulled that one as well. Bruce eventually filed the missing persons report, and boy howdy, did they ever find Felix! Living it up with 33 stolen credit cards in Vegas! Then they found out Felix had run up $40,000 on Bruce's credit cards during his adventure! One can only assume poor Bruce never questioned the strange names of the hospitals on the charge slips. Bally's. Circus Circus. "Man, that Donald Trump is into EVERYTHING!" So now Felix is in jail in Las Vegas, his bail is $20,000, and his marriage is probably in a lot of trouble. Not everyone thinks it's over. Felix's sister says they belong together. She says they had a very happy marriage. Bruce says he never really saw Felix naked during their three and a half year happy marriage. Bruce says he feels really stupid. We dunno what Felix says, because he's in the slammer, and so far, he isn't talking. And I say that I'll bet you Bruce finds a way to bail Felix out. I can picture him, tears in his eyes, driving toward the courthouse with the local country station blasting "Stand By Your Man" from the car speakers. And if he DOESN'T take Felix back, you just know the con-man/woman talent will be lining up to take a crack at the guy, so to speak. It's gonna be "The Crying Dating Game" for sure. Well, I don't want to be TOO mean to poor Bruce. After all, if not for him, I might still think I was the most naive schmuck in the universe. Bruce scores a THREE on DJ's Sharp Stick Meter. For future reference, a score of ONE indicates a person who can be left alone with a sharp stick, but he or she is apt to hurt someone. A TWO is a person who will require Bactine and guaze if left alone with a sharp stick for any length of time. A THREE is a person who will somehow become impaled and pinned to a nearbye tree if left alone with a sharp stick for more than thirty seconds. There is no FOUR, or Bruce would have been one. I guess a FOUR would be a guy who would also be immasculated by the stick, and that would just be too much confusion for this story. DJ Johnson --------------------------------------------------------------------------- * * * * * * * * * * * * That about wraps up our August issue. Special thanks go out, as usual, to Don Dill for the use of his cartoon character, Stress Man, in the "Editor's Notes" icon in our graphic/sound version. Also to Blair Buscareno, editor of Teen Scene (a great zine for fans of garage, punk & surf music. E-Mail blairb@eden.rutgers.edu for subscription info), for continued moral support, and to NeoSoft Corp, for use of their incredible programs, which make the graphic/sound version of Cosmik Debris possible. Be sure to check out our homepage. http://www.greatgig.com/cosmikdebris You will find lots of links to help you become politically educated, links to great music sites, and our Featured Band Of The Month page. This month, The Basement Brats images and sound files will be made available there. They become the second band to be featured on the page. By the way, thank you's to The Mel-Tones, for being the first. A lot of you checked out their music in the past month, so we'd like to thank you, as well. See you next month. - DJ Editor *************************************************************************** E-MAIL ADDRESSES FOR CONTACTING COSMIK DEBRIS' WRITERS DJ Johnson (Editor)......moonbaby@serv.net Cai Campbell.............vex@serv.net James Andrews............ohchrist@u.washington.edu Louise Johnson...........aquaria@serv.net coLeSLAw.................smoke signals, I spose... Scott Wedel..............syzygy@cyberspace.com Steven Leith.............leith@wolfe.net Alan Wright..............Head13@aol.com Magthorn.................Magthorn@aol.com Cosmik Debris' WWW site..http://www.greatgig.com/cosmikdebris Subscription requests....moonbaby@serv.net Cai Campbell's BBS (Great Gig In The Sky)..206-935-8486 Jim Andrews' WWW site..http://weber.u.washington.edu/~ohcrhist/ Steven Leith's WWW site..http://www.wolfe.net/~leith