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G0D!!! D0G!! GOD!!! ***^ . . . PR0PZ T0 MY H0M13Z!@# ; H1 M0M! ; B1G UP... . . . __ ..___ f __a._ , , g _Z##@ "---- J,__U_ __ - ,s_ ""- 8_ @ Q =*####@95DJ_=*"~~~~~~~=***^^~"M"23^g*ggg==~~_~~"~~~~~~~#~"@^#=~~~~~~~~ =="4^^~~~ f """""~--s== f =g 5 "~--.._ "~ -* TH3 KR3DZ *-. DUN BY: Y0R 3L33T ED1T0R: K-R4D WZD VVVVV: W1TH TH3 H3LP 0F *ALL Y0O D0RX!* R33D TH1S BO0K: 'Invisible Monsters' by Chuck Palahnuik E4T TH1S BR3KFZT CER34L: N0 FUQN C3RE4L!@# BKFZT CER3AL 1Z F0R H0M0Z MMK!#@ W0TCH THE3ZE MO0V1EZ: 'Even Dwarves Started Small', 'Cannibal Holocaust' W0TCH THE3ZE MO0V1EZ: 'Even Dwarves Started Small', 'Cannibal Holocaust' W0TCH THE3ZE MO0V1EZ: 'Even Dwarves Started Small', 'Cannibal Holocaust' L1CK MY AS5: I AM S3R10US!$#@ NOOOO0000OOOOOO000OOOOO!!!!! HERE 1Z S0M3 M0R3 V3RY R4D1KL BMP2ASC! OK! __ ~-..__ 9 ]L 8 -- a.,_____ 8 ___,___-- _________6_]L_2____ ____ _""99sjgga= __@__,__,g__~______a-"3#^p;ggggga # ]F"#- ._ -@=-__ .. --- ~ Q""^*---...___ !###" * ?L T -"^^ # ` " --- "" * * * t . 3 . r . r . 0 . r * * * ,__ggggge*pga__ ,____ggp@ `" g#B "" ,______ag, 1###2, ##@_ `_2B@#_ /#@ "##g__ __ee#""""^"*w-__ _a#@" &#@ `4#@4" ,,aaaaaa,___ `4gM" '" _pC P __ ___9a ""p_ p#" ]8###@ _]##Bg@ "@, ;gg_ ___agg#^ ,W# ]8"4" Q@ """ @ ,N______3##g__ *######*#####g \a "" ,_JL '#""""""@@###9 "4#ga ># @qggggDg# ,@ +4" " \g_ @Q#55@8@[ d '#g_ 4J____,*" __@ __ ,ga _g#@q___ __g#"`@#gg__]## _#MJg@" `""--.. _,j@^"" __99##&#" ###B#___, j#@ `""""" gp_a#@ _,__g "M#d##g##4"" * * * d . 3 . s . 7 r . u k . t i 0 n * * * ' There is a kind of religion in science; it is the religion of a person who believes that every event in the universe can be explained in a rational way as the product of some previous event. This faith is violated by the discovery that the world had a beginning under conditions in which the known laws of physics are not valid. When that happens, the scientist has lost control. He reacts by ignoring the implications, or by trivializing and calling it the big-bang, as if the universe was a firecracker. For the scientist who has lived by his faith in the power of reason, the story ends like a bad dream. He has scaled the mountains of ignorance; he is about to conquer the highest peak; and as he pulls himself over the final rock, he is greeted by a band of theologians who have been sitting there for centuries.' - Dr Robert Jastrow, former director of NASA's Goddard Institute for Space Studies. BR34K1TBR43K1TD0WNBR34K1TD0WNBR34K1TD0WNBR34K1TBR43K1TD0WNBR34K1TD0WNBRKBR3KBR 3K1TBR3KBR34KBR34KBR34K1TBR43K1TD0WNBR34K1TD0WNBR34K1TD0WNBR34K1TBR43K1TBR3$KB BRKBRKBRKBRKBRKBR3KK1KBRKBRKBR3KK1BR3KK1TBR34KBR34KBRKBRK1DWNBREKBR3KBRKK1TYBR ________,,,........... .........______ $$$$$$$$$½½½½½½½^^^^^ '''''"""???zz. $$ ^?$$$ `?; $$ '$$ k0nt3ntz 0f th1Z, l1k3, t0tally m1ndL3sz kr4p #17 $;$$$ ?; ,,?;I$$$ ,"________________________________________________________..,,##½½½', $$ _.+ +.,; --- [ F34TUR3D 1N TH1Z ISJU3 ] <00> "My Anus iz Huge" by Pneuma <01> "The Gronch That Ate New York" by I.P.Daley --- [ FR3E 3LE3T B0NUS M3D14 ] <99> Sum Stuf <98> Sm Othrr Stufs <97> Impossibly ko0l kover art by rawdata ,?' $$; $$$QQQ####,,,,________________________________ _________ ______ _ ^^^^^^^^^"""""" __... . . ...__ d$$^^ ^^$$b .?$; ;$$;:;, _. k-R4D 3D1T0Ri4L ._ ,;:;,, _. [30/06/2002] Today I was for-real arrested for the first time. It was at 'The Mall of Rosebank', where I was wandering around bored, by myself, thinking about how much I hate ppl, how ugly this place is, wotwot.. And there were these 'crime stop' ppl, standing at the foot of the escalators collecting money, and there was this mingan old chiq with a 'stop crime' t-shirt whining 'help stop craaim, rosebank police..'; and they had all of these tiny yellow safety cones with 'POLICE' written on them, and they'd arranged them all along the ends of the escalator, and put one right on top of this pole that you have to walk around to go up the up-escalator, which was annoying.- Sew on my way baq out of the mall I pull the d0rkiest face I can @ the crime stop lady, pick up the cone off the pole, and start walking away, towards the exit. I'm just outside, and I'm beginning to wonder if these ppl r gona come after me or not, when I hear a security guard whistling after me. The smarter, more paranoid, distrusting part of my brain is telling me to throw the cone at him as hard as I can and run like hell, but the more rational, domestic part of my brain walks me over to him and tries to give him the cone & explain to him that it was all just a prank. But he's not interested in taking the cone, or letting me put it back, and he grabs me by the arm & marches me off into the security control room, where I get to re-tell my version of what happened to a million other security guards who either weren't there or weren't listening, or only decided they had something to interrogate me about at that moment.. One suggests that I am stealing safety cones today, and will be stealing cars and breaking into houses tomorrow. Another suggests that I am going to use the cone to pose as a crime stop fund collector. I tell him that I'd still need a T-Shirt & a collection tin, and perhaps some more cones.. I point out again that it was a simple prank, and that the cone does not have any retail value.. One particularly moronic, agressive security guard starts pointing at the cone, on the part where it says 'POLICE', and asks me 'What does it say here?' 'Police.' 'What does it say here?' '..Police.' 'Value!' Um. 'Do you know what is the meaning of value?' 'Uuh.' 'Do you know what is the, dictit of value?' Em, know 4u what is the meaning of 'definition', mor0n? ;p I mean: 'Uuuh, yea, uhm, like.. it's worth..' At one other point this same moron was asking me 'Hell to who?' repeatedly after I had, perhaps, said 'hell' in some sentence, but I don't think I was even talking to him, and I had forgotten what I said already, so I just looked at him and eventually he shut up. Neway.. So I'm trying to hurry things up a bit - asking them if I can make a call, asking them if I can fill in my ID number on the form they've taken out for banning ppl from the Rosebank Mall in terms of the Trespass Act 6/59, but they don't seem to be in much of a hurry and don't want me to do anything else except answer their retarded questions.. 'Do you smoke druks?' 'No.' 'Are you siek?' 'Uuh, no.' 'I asked you a question, are you siek?' 'Uuuh, no.' 'Are you on medication?' Bla Bla Bla Bla Bla. Enter Mister Inspector K. Pillay.. The Inspector tells me about how hard he's been working collecting money at the Mall, and how he had to do this on this day and this on this day, shame.. He asks if I smoke druks and if they've searched me; this they have done.. 'I just want to give you a klap, meyn!' 'Can I give you a klap?' 'Uuh, ..No.' 'Must I give you a klap?' 'No..' ;p He asks me something else which requires me to say more than one word. 'Why are you speaking like that? Are you a moffie?' 'No.' - I'm just soft-spoken & polite, not very much like you, diqhed.. I think that all cops have very strong feelings of some kind about homosexuality, which are very prominent amongst their other mounting obsessions which eventually make them decide to become policemen.. 'I've been working na na na to protect our community' - 'and because of monkeys like you..' Bla Bla. Clowns. Monkeys. The Inspector calls the police station, and tells them to send some1 round to 'lock me up', and leaves.. Later enter two black policemen, and every1 get's to re-iterate their 2 cents about what happened.. One of the two policemen in particular seems to think this is all a bit mad, and says that he doesn't think this will stand up in court na na na, and they talk about it, and the one policeman phones my dad on the phone a security guard had previously told me 'couldn't call out' - 'hello, umm, your son bla bla bla. is he healthy, or what? we don't know..', and eventually the two policemen consult Inspector Pillay on the issue, who is adamant that I should go to jail or whatever, so they take out the arrest form and start painstakingly filling it all in.. 'What colour is the cone?' one policeman asks. 'Lime.' says the other.. 'Lime..' the first one repeats, and writes it down.. 'What is it? A traffic cone?' 'Safety cone.' I suggest. 'Safety cone.' The other policeman echos. 'How do you spell `cone`?' the first policeman asks. 'C-O-N-E-S' a security guard suggests.. 'C... C-O-N-E' the other policeman says.. Bla Bla Bla Bla Bla Bla Bla Bla Bla Bla.. So eventually they finish filling out the form, and they take me out of the control room, into the back of a police van, and off to the Rosebank police station, where I sit in the back of the car for 10 minutes while the two policemen have a chat. Then they take me into the station, where they put me in a back room; not a detention cell, I notice, but a back room with computers and papers n stuf.. I thought it a good omen that they had not thrown me in a real holding cell yet, but as of yet I did not know what to expect.. And it was Sunday, so I'd at least have to spend the night in jail until the courts opened again the next day and they decided my case was too dumb to actually be sent there.. My girlfriend calls, and I have a long-ish chat with her - she's all concerned about my recent spate of kleptomania and me being in jail and all, and when I get off the fone to her, I can hear my dad's boss's voice from the front of the station. He's wearing one of the 'STOP CRIME' stickers they were selling at the mall and he's telling the other policemen that Inspector Pillay says it's ok to drop the whole thing and that they can fone him and check. Turns out the Honourable Mr Pillay's change of opinion cost only a lousy 20 bux.. But the other policemen say that The Mall of Rosebank had written down that I was arrested na na na, and another 100 bux later, they don't care either, and magically, somewhere, somehow, justice, um, happens, and they let me go.. If you live in Jo'burg, look-up Mr Komoran Pillay's home phone # and tell him you read about his fam0us ass on the effkay.org, and tell him that he released one of ZA's most danger0us hax0rz to rape & pillage at will for a lousy 20 bux, and also that he is a gay-homosexual scrotum-scratching dog-raping butt-bandit (write that down so as 2b sure that you get it verbatim mm'k).. ..Um. And that is all I have to tell you. ;) for now.. -ed. ;, ,;;4, ,?;;$;,__________________________________________________________________,,7$; __... . . ...__ d$$^^ ^^$$b .?$; ;$$;:;, _. ByT3w4R3z ._ ,;:;,, _. ---***----***------------(&*)--(*&)^---->%&^> [ Errata fr0m y0r ed. ] ---***----***------------(&*)--(*&)^---->%&^> It's no secret - this e-zine; particularly earlier issues - were very bad, and often, completely inaccurate. ;) Listed below are a few of the erratatatic materialz that we hav releesed to the massez in the past; fUk1Ng Ko0l... [ FK2: 'Hacking Through Windows 95 Plus! Security' by Wyzewun ] ^-- I cannot remember what this article was supposed to be about at all. [ FK3: 'A Hint For Social Engineering Through IRC' by Wyzewun FK5: 'Protecting Memory And Addressing Part One' by wyze1 FK5: 'Implications of Unrestricted Port Binding in NT' by wyze1 FK5: 'A Lession in Lactural [ Lateral? ;p ] Thinking' by wyze1 FK6: 'Protecting Memory And Addressing Part Two' [ waq! ;p ] by wyze1 FK6: 'Securing RedHat Linux 6.0' by wyze1 ] ^- These articles are, just, like, lame, is all. I apologise for having written them. While I'm at it, I may as well apologise for having such a kr4p e-z1ne and be1ng such an unele3t d0rk, bah.. [ FK6: 'Making Free Calls on Blue Payphones' by Cyberware ] ^- Nobody got this to work apparently. I don't think it does, coz the du0d who sent us this shit was this thick dutchman do0d azwell, sew lark... [ Thought from Wizdumb in the credits of FK9 on the Quake3 engine & VRML. ] ^- First of all, everything *except* the engine in Quake3 is open-source, and I'm not completely sure what I wanted the VRML consortium to do with it, aEHEH. ;PP [ FK14: Pestilence .c & .txt by Wizdumb ] ^- Some of you may have noticed that this post was never on BugTraq. ;> I believe it's a working concept; Maybe it was just obvious to every1 else; or maybe my fUnNy mAnNeR annoyed the moderator. ;>> Oh, and soundtraq muzak before issue 16 iz, like, mostly waq, so ignore it, aEheAHea.. ---***----***------------(&*)--(*&)^---->%&^> Some Thoughts On 'Vodacom's World of Games' from the ed. ---***----***------------(&*)--(*&)^---->%&^> I signed up for a free WAP account @ vodacom4me.co.za, and have since been using the site a bit, to send SMSz n wotnot.. & while I was browsing around there site, I stumbled across this thingy about 'Vodacom's World of [SMS] Games' @ 0820008200 mm'k.. Basically what is here is: IDOLS TRIVIA (did not look @ this), SUPER12 TRIVIA (emm, ditto), LOVE M8 (eHEH), and SMS Chat.. The SMS Chat is real, albeit completely krap (altho it is spozdly international, w ppl from New Zealand & China n w0tn0t, which wz y i wz vaguely interested in it in the first place) -- we will cm baq 2 this.. The LoveM8 Game (Send 'LM PLAY' to play (after sending 'REG YOURNAME' to registr a handle)); is *completely fake*, I am sure.. ;p After you tell it u want to play it SMSz u & sez 'I am looking for ppl to play with u bla bla, wil wait up to 10 mins'; then it SMSz u like 'ok, these 3 handles picked at random from our database are competing for your attention', 'your first question is: when @ the beach, do u wear A) As little as legal .. Bla Bla Bla, and you send it 'LM A' - as little as legal - and it SMSz u baq saying that every1 has rated u 100%, and then SMSz u again asking: 'For me sex is a _______ thing A) Physical B) Emotional C) Necessary' So then u send it 'LM C', and it SMSz u baq and tells you that u were sposed to pick 'B' and every1 is now rating u @ 50%.. Thing is, I can't figure out how you get on the other side of this game as such, which makes me think it is a complete SCAM.. ;) [Ammendment by the ed: The LoveM8 game no longer features on Vodacom's World of Games; it is now an assortment of other, equally arbitrary krap..] The SMS Chat seems to be real, but is very krap. I was drawn to it bcoz I thought harassing lots of ppl for the cost of one SMS could be ko0l - Guess again. After you've sent 'REG WHATEVER', and 'T2 HELP', followed by 'T2 ROOMS', followed by 'T2 ENTER ROOM', you're sent a list of handles that are in the room. You then send 'T2 HANDLE BLA BLA' to whoever you think sounds like they could just be yor true love. And g0d you'll have a hard time choosing.. Real life example: OZCHICK1: HI, ASL? [in response to] LOVEHUNK: [that's me ;p] HELO!! I AM MOST PECULIAR TO FUCK YOU! IF YOU LIKE HAM & BOILED EGGS, THAN I AM YOR MAN. Another One: WENDZ2: SO DO I. SO WHAT U WAITING FOR? I'M LONELY & BORED. C'MON - ENTERTAIN ME. I'M ALL YOURS [AND] WENDZ2: AND NOW? Y U SO QUIET? [in response to] LOVEHUNK: I WONT VERY MUCH TO PLEAS TUCH YOR BOOB PLEAS. ... lonely? ;p you don't even have to pretend you're not a complete moron or have a vaguely attractive personality to be the man here.. One more, slightly more extreme, real life example: ;p SUSIE15: Hi. You can fuck me if you want, I don't mind. So what are you going to do to me first? [in response t0; a variation of one of the above..] LOVEHUNK: HELO! I AM MOST PEKULIAR TO FUK YOU!! IF YOU LIKE POLONY & HARD-BOILD EGGZ - THAN I AM YOR GUY. [followed by] LOVEHUNK: FIRST AM I UNWRAPPING THE POLONY. THAN AM I MAKING THE SANDWICHES. [followed by] LOVEHUNK: NOW I AM PEELING OFF THE LAST OF MY POLONY WRAPPER & SHOVING THE REMAINS HARD RIGHT UP INTO YOR WET STINKY PUNANI. LOVELY, SEE? [no response] Btw, after the first T2 message you send you will get an SMS that sez that 'T2 is a great way to meet people' and that you shouldn't send content that could be considered offensive in any way; but the msgz r not censored none-the-less.. Sew, like, the only kool thing I could think about this is using it to play dumb pranks on your friends who don't know about 'Vodacom's World of Games' by registering them for it quickly while they're out of the room with 'REG HANDLE' to 0820008200, and then deleting the 2 SMSz it will send them baq. ;p You don't have to make them join a room or anything, sew just the one SMS to register them is sufficient to create an anonymous SMS pipe to txt y0r er0t1c p03tRy to that girl in yor class that u f4nCy or wotevr.. Just send 'T2 THEIRHANDLE BLABLA' to 0820008200 on yor fone to harass them anonymously, then 'REG NEW NAME' to change your handle and harass them more, or wotevr, bla... The first T2 message they get from you will come with another SMS explaining how to reply.. ;) ---***----***------------(&*)--(*&)^---->%&^> Thoughts on Audio CD Copy Protection from the ed. ---***----***------------(&*)--(*&)^---->%&^> The new Aphex Twin CD, druqkz (which is a highly recommended album, btw), has a sticker on it reading 'This CD cannot be played on computers', which, as it would seem, it cannot. Why? And what to do about this? I figure it is probably just missing some industry-standard boot-sectory sort of information, and if you were a re4lly klev3r fell0w you could just write a driver to allow you to read it normally. The easier alternative, if you just want to rip it, is plugging your hi-fi into your sound-card's audio-in and ripping it through there. The main problem with doing it this way is you'll have to record each track one at a time, or make a rip of the whole album. The same form of copy protection could arguably be achieved by making your whole album on a single track, albeit it would annoy people and the other way is obviously better. ;p So, depending on what ur doing and h0w el8 u r, it may turn out faster to try and write a driver to make these CDz work. Of course, it will also make things faster for a whole bunch of other ppl, coz once sm1 has written a driver to allow this, no1 els wil hav 2 do it. ;p Comments on this, code?- ;p wzd@effkay.org ---***----***------------(&*)--(*&)^---->%&^> On Vegitarianism, by the ed. ---***----***------------(&*)--(*&)^---->%&^> Few people know that I have, for some years, been a fairly strict vegitarian, and when they find out that I am, they usually have something retarded to say. A little soapbox here for the case for vegitarianism. My primary rationalisation for not eating meat is purely from a socio-economical standpoint; in that: the amount of food that is fed to a cow before it is eaten could feed *many* more people than that cow itself - if you did Grade 9 Biology you will understand that this is the case, and that eating cows on this grounds alone could be considered unnecessary, stupid, and wasteful. My other reason for being vegitarian is more moral -- If you acknowledge that all animals (including ourselves), are all built of the same crap, and are all equally and completely worthless in the universal scheme of things; you might want to allow everything equal & fair treatment as you would like to recieve for yourself. The act of eating a hamburger is not morally wrong. The act of *buying* hamburgers, and allowing, through your financial support, for more animals to be bred & slaughtered, could certainly be considered morally dubious at least to anyone who thinks about it with a clear conscience. One argument I've gotten from non-vegitarians is that plants are alive too, which is true, however: plants are clearly non-sensate - they don't have eyes or ears; and they aren't really even sensate enough to experience death as such - a potato can grow again after being out of the earth for months -& they really don't know any better for when they are plucked out of the ground and eaten; where-as a cow would most certainly be quite aware of its impending death, and would probably already be somewhere else were it able to be.. But the most-used argument by non-vegitarians is that they actually just don't give a fuck, which is fine - but it's generally indicative that they aren't able to think as far as to why it's obviously completely fucked-up, and unnecessary. [Re: Protein: Once inside your body all protein is broken up into constituent amino acids- only 4(/14) of which cannot be synthesised by your body itself, all of which are readily available in various non-meat foods] I consider myself a bit of a nihilist, but actually, I think most people, regardless of what they say they believe, are much more nihilistic and fucking A-moral than myself. They think everything is a theory and don't have the capacity to compute anything they might believe into potential fact. They will claim to be people of religious faith, but the underlying truth is that they CANNOT THINK and that they BELIEVE IN NOTHING AT ALL. Arrg. ;, ,;;4, ,?;;$;,__________________________________________________________________,,7$; __... . . ...__ d$$^^ ^^$$b .?$; ;$$;:;, _. Malebag ._ ,;:;,, _. y3 0ld3 f4v0ur1t3 m41lb4g, w1th k-r4d [] k0mm3ntz fr0m y0r el8 .ed, w0rd. -------[ From: "Marc Howard" To: wizdumb@leet.org Subject: hey there ]------- Man I was looking at some of the exploits that you sent to BugTraq--you are a genious. [ sum hav caled me a genious, yes.. ] I guess you can say I'm a newbie when it comes to hacking. [ Ok.. ] I wanted to know how did you get into it and what books/methods would you recommend to others to get into it? [ i g0T int0 th3 w0rLd 0f k-r4d h4x1ng bk0z ey3 w0z t0o ugl3e t0 k0ns1dr ne othr h0bbi3z. i w0z inSp1r3d bY tH3 cULT 0f tHe dE4d c0w, bk0z they d0n't ev3n h4v t0 wr1te/kn0W anyth1ng ab0ut hax1ng t3w b3e s3wPr-ele3tz. mY aDvYcE t0 y0o: yo0zE th3 PHF teqne3k & re4d the EffK4y. ] --NewbieB0y [ oK, RuZpEk. ] -------[ From: "Ou Baas" To: w1@antioffline.com Subject: Oooooh !! I ph24r !! ]------- Oh Gr34t 1 Damn, no good articles to give you, and I haven't had a idea in a long time, never mind a good one, but what I do have is admiration and support ! Lead on and teach oh wize1. I sit at your feet and eat all your bullshit like kandy. U are da man. Also props 2 U'r crew. 4 ppl like me who have no brains the best we can do is gawk at ppl who do have the mad skills. Thanx for a entertaining and invormative e-zine. I downloded all isues and read the first 5 issues in like 2 hours .... this IS the good stuf I Ph34r ! [ aHEaHea, uhm, I like this mail. :) He, like, reffered to eating our feces or sumn; this guy iz ko0l. :P ] -------[ From: "John Little" To: comments@effkay.org Subject: 13373r than a bucket full of 1337 ]------- hey all you leet people, nice zeen, some great stuff even if you don't live in .za are we likely to see more java stuff in the future? (just started really getting into it - i'm suprised more people haven't started coding attack scripts and other cool shit in it - socket programming SOOO much easier than c/c++). n e way just wanted to say great 'zine, keep it up [ Not very likely to see any Java code from me any time soon; If I think of a project I should write in it I'll use it, but atm I'm writing Perl code mostly, bcoz I em lazy & couldn't be bothered. Glad u like the 'zine... ;p ] -------[ From: Jacob Pfeffer To: wizdumb@leet.org Subject: HElp ]------- ??I can't get access to my pc, running win 2000 prof... Wants logon password, how to get around this? Got your trogan but how to work it? Got two other cracks, one is beatlm and the other is sub 7, how to use them. I got alto of imp info on my pc, I am a college student - microsoft basically told me to reinstall. Can you help??? [ Uhm. Short Answer: No. Go Away. ;p ] -------[ From: "Ronald Colijn" To: wizdumb@leet.org Subject: Hacking an access database ]------- Message [ Don't you call me a fux1ng message!$@$@#$% ;/ ] hey there, [ Whatever ;/ ] trying to get in to an Access database (probably 2000) but am new at this. I found your code but don't know what to to with it (C/VB/Java?) [ *Shrug* Maybe j0o should trY 0ur pat3nt3d effk4y skr1pt0 brutef0rc3 t3qne3k? Uhm; S0mething like th1s... $ gcc axz.java gcc: wtf 1z th1z cr4p? h3ll n0! $ ls a.out $ fuq mahn! fuq: command not found !: what iz this unh0ly fuqn t0k3n huh puNK?! $ vbc axz.java vbc: th1s lo0kz c0nfewz1ng - is th1s a r33l veebee k0d3? $ ls a.out $ javac axz.java javac: command not found ] Help? [ No Thanks, I h4ve th3 t3qn33k already. ] Thanks, RC -------[ From: "wizdumb@effkay.org" <> To: wzd@effkay.org Subject: you wont remember this. ]------- [ Oh dear... ;)) ] you thought you slept. no notice stuff different since you woke up? check your rectum, he? wut i tell jo0!! **note to wizdumb i emailed this to myself, you wont remember, i am wizdump the rules of the club you made up.** 1st rule of bitch slap club. - do not bitch about bitch slap club. 2nd rule of bitch slap club. - jo0 DUMB? i SAID no bitchin \'bout bitch slap club. 3rd rule of bitch slap club. - only two ho3s at a time 4th rule of bitch slap club. - only one bitch slap orgy at a time. 5th rule of bitch slap club. - no high heels, make-up, just knickers over head! 6th rule of bitch slap club. - when wh0re yells \"BROKE A NAIL\" slappin stops 7th rule of bitch slap club. - no members from women/transvestites against abuse. 8th rule of bitch slap club. - this is getting harder as i go on, the rules i mean :p 9th rule of bitch slap club. - only weapon allowed, rolled up hardcopy of EFFKEY(issues after 14 only) 10th rule of bitch slap club. - killing the gerbil is optional. 11th rule of bitch slap club. - scratch rule 10, replace with 2. substitute 2 with n+[NUMBER OF MEMBERS]/IQ of smartest member. Carefull of DEVISION BY ZERO!! [Devision.. Duhvision..] then enter new number back in list. 12th rule of bitch slap club. - adding any more rules is prohibited. and stupid. border line insane. [13th rool of bitch slut klub - aEHaHeaHeaHeaHeaHaAeaEa EAheHAeAHea AHeaHeaHea aHEaHEHEaHEH!@$#] [ NICELY, PLUNKETt!! .. ;pp ] -------[ From: "Rishal Motiram" To: comments@effkay.org Subject: help on solving algorithm ]------- Wassup [ Wassuuuuuuuup.. ] Firstly, WELL DONE on an execellent e-zine, it rocks!! My name's Rishal, from JHB, im 17 and in Matric. I need help on solving the Vodago algorithm. I've been trying for a while now and had no luck. Is there a check algorithm (like the Luhn Formula in credit cards) or are the recharge vouchers just random numbers?? [ I suspect that they are randomly generated. ;> ] And if theres is no algorithm then is there another way to get credit, or maybe call and not get charged?? As u know the peak rate for Vodago/4U (per second) is 6 cents a sec, thats R3.60 a min!, which i feel is too fuckin much. I'll try my best to help as well but as i said im in Matric so i dont have alot of free time. [ 4U is 6c per second on-peak, or 1.5c ps off-peak (90c pm), which I think is pretty reasonable. And I am busy trying to keep my asz off the streetz n shit, instead of being a bum skoolkid like you, sew I don't exactly have ridiculous amounts of free time to dedicate to this stuf either, + I've lost interest + I don't care about you or anyone else + myself. ;~( So bleh. ] Please reply as soon as you can. [ I will put it on my action item list.. ] Thanking you in advance, [ Huh, Huh, I said 'action item'.. uh huh huh, huh... ] Rishal. _______________________________________________________________ http://www.webmail.co.zathe South-African free email service -------[ From: "ANTIGEN_ANTIZOL " To: comments@effkay.org Subject: Server at www.w00w00.org Port 80 ]------- [ what u say is very interesting.. ] -------[ From: "Vade97" To: comments@effkay.org Subject: darling ]------- [ shut up!@# fuqn lemur!!$#@!#@ ] -------[ From: "Zoogie" To: wizdumb@leet.org Subject: darling ]------- [ shut up!!!#@$ :( fukn leave me *al0ne* mm'K!@$ ;/ ] =======*********************************====================================== -------[ FUQ1NG KO0L B0NUS STUFF!#$@$% ]-------------------------------------- =======*********************************====================================== This wasn't mailed in, it's some commentary on the zine that a reader found on the web, which was too cool to go unpublished. ;p Thanks to w3stside for pointing us to the URL... ----------------------------------------------------->> [http://www.geocities.com/jayel2711] 25 JANUARY 2002, 14:10 I am almost 100% sure there is going to be a backlash for me for what I am about to write but I call 'em like I see 'em. I just spent the last hour reading an e-zine called Forbidden Knowledge issue 15 and 16 (the links are where I stumbled across them). All I can say is that I have never ever read a bigger load of crap in my whole life. The author is so full of hot air I am suprised he has not spontaneously combust. I suppose that you are allowed to be like that when you [are] young and you have some computer skills. You get so lost in cyber space that reality becomes non existent. Kind of like those fanatical Arabs that are so immersed in their religion that the world around them actually fades into oblivion. Never mind that if it were not for reality their escapades into delusion would not be possible. [int3rest1ng k0nc3pt y0u h4v3 th3r3, b0yo.. tell me that again..] A case in point in issue 16 is how the author rants about 11 September "Attacks such as the ones that took place on September 11th are not a problem that America can solve; because they *are* the problem. It just happens that some people have finally gotten sick enough of what America is doing to the rest of the world to take matters into their own hands. And I support them. So fuck you. American Facist Swine." Very brave in the faceless world of cyberspace, however in the same article [issue] he recites how him and his friend went to hide from the cops when they came to their house cause the party was to[o] loud. [ ;p ] The cops should have found your drugs then you could have been taught a lesson in reality by "BUBBA" [*BY ``BUBBA''!!* :))] while you waited for your parents to come collect you from jail. One day when I grow up I want to bee L33t like that. Until next time Cheers Jayel ----------------------------------------------------->> [ Apart from the news sections with such riveting newz itemz such as 'My 2c about why exactly the EffKay suckz so much', there iz also a k-l33t0 IRC page detailing where u can l0kate this r4d do0d on the IRC, and *ahem* a 'projects' page... ] [http://www.geocities.com/jayel2711/projects.html] PROJECTS Being the kind of person I am, I start a million different things but never finish any of them. This is my log of them. I am currently in the process of trying to learn the following (all self-taught cause it irks me to pay those ridiculous prices that training "academy's" charge)": Linux (RedHat 7.0) Perl 5 Mysql FreeBSD PHP version 4 Irc Eggdrop bots Apache Webserver. (Windows version cause IIS sux) ----------------------------------------------------->> Yaw, sew 0nce he'z finished his k-l33t0 pr0jektz of study and become a felow so0p3r-el8 he w1ll, l1ke, 0v3rthr0w us w1th h1z madsk1llz or s0mething. ;p I don't know what p0ss1ble k-dr4m4t1k b4ckla5hes he was reffering to at the beginning of his rant about how much we suck, but, like, I published the d0rk, so, like, aHEaHEA! :) Tnq vry m0ch f0r re3d1ng the EffKAy. Inkreese z Peece. Kill the fukcn white-man. Ok. ? - y0r el8 ed. -------[ K-R4D K-K1EF K-FR3SH K-N441C3 K-PHHTPPPPHTTPHTPHFFPTHPTFFHTP ]------- ;, ,;;4, ,?;;$;,__________________________________________________________________,,7$; ________,,,........... .........______ $$$$$$$$$½½½½½½½^^^^^ '''''"""???zz. $$ ^?$$$ `?; $$ '$$ the end of the meaningful universe... $;$$$ ?; ,,?;I$$$ ,"________________________________________________________..,,##½½½', $$ _.+ +.,; [ K-R4DN3SS 1Z 0N TH3 R1Z3!@#% LAMERZ PH34R!#@$ OKAY!#$ ] ,---, ,e"a-eJ$_ ,?,^ 9g', d-p" "W_$ $"< `W_f &") `@ a ,N " Qc! __________ . --~_______________ ^-.._ _. -^ ____,aaaaaaa_J___~_--., Qg_,^" "M ,--qa ,egg," ` "e _^ "Mg"-_ QC`--"_ae^^wg_~~ { a-_p" `^qJ^._ J" ,e"" "9s ^,_ _ ^_a^" ""e__- ,_ ,-"__,4_ 3 ,@,-e_`-, _. -',e^" "4w,_~~ <__B Y_ ,@ g _B- ~-~,am^ 8^,mwea____`--____-" ____,aewq_2_ ,@ e "4g_(" "W ," @aY_ ,@ 1 `@g`-" d 9g\, ,@ 1 _F^ [, Yg}_ (L/ _,-_p^""eJ~._ Ma9 ,N 9 _,-~5w^" ""eJ=--__ `@l ]@ 9 _. -"_a^" ""*wJ=- .__B ]@__3a-^" """^ewJ_1 He's advancing closer towards me again, still holding the monkey firmly by its neck. "Oob Num Nub Nummm`Twa", he says to me. "n0 w4y do0d" I retort, completely 3l33t-l1k3, "bc0z, like, y0u're only seeing half 0f the picture. man. I mean; I look at y0r monkey there and i see a *s1ck fuck1ng m0nk3y*; d1g?" He pauses a moment to glance at the ape and then quickly turns his attention back towards me, stepping right up in front of me now, holding the now quite battered-looking marmoset directly in front of my nose. ..Or is it a lemur? "Ooba Num-Fuf GIG!" he insists. I pause for a moment to try and think, wondering how I could word what I want to say so as to prevent the situation from becoming ugly. And I have a horrible feeling that thats precisely what's about to happen anyway... But, like, h4rk, c0z, like, what the fuck is going on, man? For suddenly I realised that I was in fact not in that terrible place, but asleep in front of my computer, the edit0r of a l0wly e-zine; and that the man was nothing more than a figment of my tortured little chemically-imbalanced mind. And I realise that I *am* the man, *and* the ailing monkey, and everything else that had ever seemed real to me.. And I close my eyes again.. and seek to be nothing at all. EOF.