O= /) FLIPPERSMACK 021 `= culturemag for a penguin generation http://www.flippersmack.com/ x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x Happy Halloween everyone! I've spent the last week working on a Halloween costume, and the week prior getting ready for the Company of Friends Roadshow, where I was the featured artist in my first art show! Also shown were Todd Pluciennik (Penguin Palace), Erica Knoblock (Penguin Palace), Adam Gastelum (Sypher), Virgil Siemplo (Sypher), Leah Peterson, and a few other people. The artwork by my turtle Gigaflop, and Todd's turtle Sammy was also on display. It went really well, and I'll slowly be putting the artwork online at http://www.penguinpalace.com/ I also coordinated a fashion show at the event, with tons of help from SlapAyoda. It featured upcoming streetwear lines from JNCO and Afroman Productions. http://www.afroman.com/ and http://www.jnco.com/ While you have another window up, check out http://www.samhiti.com/ comic book creator of End Times. Redesigned with neato artwork! Have fun partying! pinguino [pinguino@inker.com] tABLE oF cONTENTS [fiction] Kennai's Big Day ........................... SlapAyoda [poem] Halloween Scribbles ................................ Monk Historic Halloween: The Truth ......................... pinguino [poem] Tricky Sidewalk ................................ pinguino Interview with Ian Moss ............................... pinguino Halloween Dress-up 2001 ........................... Flippersmack .x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x Kennai's Big Day by SlapAyoda (slapayoda@yahoo.com) This is the winner of the Flippersmack Writing Challenge! Congrats! The prize was an original painting by Pinguino of the main character of the story. Thanks to all who entered! -ping /* Write a story about a penguin who lives in the timeline of Tori Do. He lives in the Galapagos, and his name is Kennai. He is a creature of habit, an accountant who works in his local kingdom. He opens an anonymous letter one day that had been slipped under his door. "Meet me at the eastern waterfall at midnight. Come alone." */ -0x00x0- It was once again the time of the day where Kennai would take his leisurely waddle around the grand, exciting halls of the Royal Accountancy. Actually, there was very little be excited about in this shabby, run-down corner of the castle where the accountant his pencil pushing penguins pushed the proverbial pencils. Kennai was an account, but not THE account - his wishes were to some day be the head of His Majesty's Royal Accountancy, but he was was unsure if his heart would be able to handle the shock of a promotion of such magnitude. Nevertheless, Kennai strolled amongst the bland hallways with just enough hope in his heart to carry his flippers past the ugly paintings designated unfit for the castle's main halls. As he approached his mailbox, he concentrated meekly on his feeble excuse if he were stopped by one of his peers; he was on his way to the lavatory. It had never occurred to him that all of his peers felt the same urge to escape the stale tedium of their similar desk-traps. What Kennai would encounter at his mailbox was neither stale nor tedious; it was, indeed, rather mysterious and exciting. Before he could meet this fate, however, he would have to face an unexpected obstacle in his quest to escape boredom: an approaching higher-up who was gruffly mumbling to himself whilst ruffling papers on his way out of the mail-room. The irritated penguin looked dead-on at Kennai and asked him: "Do you know what they tried to do?" A confused Kennai, without lifting his eyes, answered: "No, sir. What did.." "They tried to take my job away! They -are- trying to take it away! They said that they have no need for Pencil Sharpening Penguins anymore! They are going to replace me with a machine!" "Well, that's not right." "Of course it isn't. They're out of their minds if they think a machine can sharpen a pencil half as good as I can! That's why I'm off to see the King! He will straighten this out!" And with that, the angry penguin was gone. He stormed through a door and was off, presumably, to see the King. Kennai continued towards the mail-room, and opened the door. It was empty. Every day, Kennai approached his mailbox with a certain anxiety, thinking each time that perhaps today was the day he would be promoted. Usually it was empty. But perhaps today, October 30th, was the day he would mark down in future calanders to remember as his greatest day. It stood out amongst all other mailboxes. His contained a small letter in a bright red envelope. His heart leaped into his throat, got stuck, and fought its way back into his chest. He reached out for the letter, and in a single hurried motion, tore the envelope off. His heart was about to sink again, nearly to the floor this time. It was not the promotion he was looking for. He knew this immediately when the letterhead read "From a close friend" instead of "Royal Accounting Legion." He stuffed the letter in his pocket and continued onwards towards his desk. After sitting down and eyeing the conspicuously new pile of papers to be processed, a pile that was slyly added in his short absence, he decided to avoid working for a short bit and take a second look at the non-promotional letter. He removed it from his pocket and unruffled the single page included in the red envelope, then began to read: --- From a close friend To Kennai Wiltfoot Kennai Wiltfoot. You must meet me at the Eastern Waterfall at midnight. Come alone. Important events are taking place whilst your eyes remain closed and unwary of the certain danger involved. --- The letter left Kennai puzzled. Firstly, he couldn't imagine who would write him such a cryptic letter. It was also entirely strange that author referred to him by his full name - it was very rare in penguin culture to use full names. He doubted that even his boss or any of his friends knew his full name. He certainly didn't know the last names of the few friends he had. The entire letter left him in a daze, especially the part concerning "the eastern waterfall." The island Kennai lived on was fairly small, and he knew exactly the waterfall the author was referring to - it was in fact his favorite place to play with the other penguins as a child. Barring his own parents, he could not think of a single penguin who would have this much personal information about him. "This 'certain danger' sounds rather uninviting," though Kennai as he stared down the stack of paper which had seemingly grown bigger in the time he was reading the note. Perhaps it had. ... After putting his long hours in at work, Kennai was anxious to get some rest. He had intentionally stuffed the note back down into the farthest corner of both his pocket and his mind, and was set on a good night of much relaxation and little 'certain danger.' That, however, was not how things were to work out, at all. Shortly after arriving home and eating the dinner that his mother had left for him, (as she had gone out for her weekly pedicure and beak waxing), he felt uneasy. Kennai's imagination had a habit of occasionally running wild, and tonight his mind was very much fixated on just what would be going on at the Eastern Waterfall tonight, to the dismay of Kennai himself. "Good gravy, why am I so concerned with this silly note? It's nothing at all, I'm sure this kind of thing happens to other penguins all the time," Kennai thought over his dinner of Cod steak and Pike fries. But he knew that wasn't the truth at all; he knew that this could be the chance of a lifetime. When else did the opportunity for adventure and excitement knock on the door of his life? Kennai fought with his own brain for several minutes. If the Cod and Pike were still alive, they would have looked up at the penguin in utter confusion. Instead, they sat on his plate, mostly uneaten. After a few minutes deliberation, Kennai stood up, prepared to head Eastward. ... The Sun was just beginning to set as Kennai reached the Eastern Waterfall, creating brilliant rose-colored patterns that danced amongst the water. He stared at the cloud of churning water at the point where the waterfall ends, and the illustrious shades of blue, green, and red reminded him of just why he used to come here so often so many years ago. He must have been rather early, after all, it wasn't even technically "night" yet. So he found a roundish rock to accommodate him, and perched atop it, waiting for his fate to reveal itself. As he sat, watching the setting Sun's rays fall from the tops of trees looming above, the serene beauty of nature overtook overtook him. This was nothing like his office, his home, or his village - this was amazing. It brought him back to his youth, released memories of playing with his childhood mates, having a grand old time. Without realizing it, Kennai had lost all touch with reality, having slipped into a complete trance. It wasn't until several hours after the Sun had fully set that Kennai realized consciousness again. He suddenly found himself sitting on exactly the same rock, in exactly the same position, with exactly the same stupid grin on his face. Everything, however, was not the same as before. Floating several inches above the ground in exactly the same way that most things do not, a ten-foot tall grinning spectre eyed Kennai up and down. Aside from the large pumpkin the ghostly apparition was using for a head, he seemed to be your typical spectre. Kennai was terrified, and simply did not know what to say. As Kennai sat, entirely motionless save for the constant but uneven twitching of his left flipper, the spectre addressed him in a booming voice. "Kennai Wiltfoot. Do you understand everything I have just told you?" Kennai was puzzled and simultaneously too scared to be puzzled. He did, however, remember that he didn't remember ever meeting this spectre before, and was certain he was uncertain about anything the spectre might have just told him. Meekly, he replied, "Uhm?" It was the best he could muster up. "Leaping lizards, you can't even remember what I just told you? How can such a feeble penguin as yourself be as courageous as to not even pay mind to what I have been telling you? If you do not heed what I tell you this time, you will regret it eternally. Now, you don't remember -any- of what I told you?" "Er.." "Not even when I told you that I was the Great Spectre of Halloween?" "..." "Hm. How about when I promised eternal doom for you and your family if you were to disobey me? No. Well, I guess I better start from the top." Kennai looked on with disbelief, his flipper still quivering. "I am the Great Spectre of Halloween! You will fear my wrath! Yourself and your family will be met with the greatest doom if you do not heed my words! I have brought from the darkest depths of the netherworld a critical message to you, Kennai Wiltfoot! Do you know why I am here?" Kennai could not even bring himself to emit an ellipsis of silence. "ANSWER ME, MORTAL!" Out of fear alone, he managed to squish the slightest sound out from voicebox: "Why?" "I have come bearing a great product. These electric pencil sharpeners will change your life. You must purchase them now or face the eternal peril of a constantly dull writing utensil!" Without hesitation or questioning, Kennai bought a case of them. He never had to face the eternal peril of a constantly dull writing utensil, ever again. -.x.x.x.- Halloween Scribbles by Monk (monkstah@hotmail.com) More disturbing graphical quotas that lack the necessary pictures in front of the eyes, but protrude such madness from within the head. --- just another month i've been plagued each year with noise echoing from upstairs little actors clamoring for something sweet at a house darker than an empty stage their non-professionalism comes through in their choices from the costume department bright yellows and bloody faces i've seen it years before i've been haunted before by ghosts of my past pressing into conscious and the sweat and cold shivers i awake to are less frightening than they seem i'm forgetting cobwebs or black and orange christmas decorations, people pushing forth the notion that women are designed for cleaning, October just seems like a good month to sleep in and let your own fears seep out. --- it all seems your so awake on 5th ave walking through corners in sneakers past midnight echoes of your face in shop windows feet back pressing close to my breath i saw you skip a step over legs outpressed never noticing what you missed it all seems so peaceful your struggling to set a pace under urban neon lights floating butterflies smooth the air under your legs that seem to shake my coat barely holds the cold i heard your stolen french words caress my ears tuning out sirens and horns it all seems rememberable your so alive on sidewalk side misplacing your cigarette deep in your purse dreams you lost form in the haze of cheap tobacco i felt your thigh unknowingly when i passed on by your the last one i touch that way it all seems so regretful you crossed into apartment from night sky the trace of your perfume stroking my lips another night on the town but tomorrow's too late to regret the night before i was only tracing your hips with a paintbrush you lept onto paper like delicate whispers in print i felt every moment as a lover felt your skin with unfinished finesse i spent hours retracing ballet movements just to do justice i'll never forget 5th ave at frozen night weekend the shop windows remind me to tip those less fortunate, like i am i'm feeling winter harder each year in canvas skin it all seems so real it all seems so fresh. -.x.x.x.- Historic Halloween: The Truth by Pinguino (pinguino@inker.com) Don't believe their lies. The smiling pumpkins and sticky little kids are mocking you. Two thousand years ago, the Celts celebrated Samhain (pronounced sow-in), the early predecessor to Halloween. In their culture, November 1 marked the end of summer and the start of a long, cold winter. It was believed that the boundaries between the living and dead became blurred that day. Samhain happened on October 31, a night that increased clarity in fortune telling. The Celts donned animal pelts and skulls, and sacrificed animals and crops to prevent misfortune in the coming winter. They told fortunes and re-lit the fire at the end of the festival. The Romans conquered the Celts and through the four hundred years of their rule, Samhain adopted customs from Romans. Feralia was a "Day of the Dead" type holiday, and another day honored Pomona, the goddess of fruit and trees. This is where the idea to "bob for apples" blossomed. Pope Bonaface replaced Samhain with "All Hallow's Day" in the early 9th century to bring a Christian twist on the barbaric festival of Samhain. It was held May 13, but later changed to November 1. The night prior began to be celebrated as "All Hallow's Eve," and eventually Halloween. It had the same elements of bonfires and angel and devil costumes. Even later in England, there were parades on All Soul's Day, or November 2nd. Ragged beggars would plead for food on the streets, as fancy-clad citizens gave them "soul cakes" in exchange for prayers for dead relatives. From this comes our tradition of trick-or-treating. Similarly in other parts of Europe, people placed bowls of food outside their doorsteps to appease the ghosts who may haunt them in the dreadful approaching winter. They wore masks when they went outside so that the ghosts wouldn't recognize them. In 1846, a major potato famine devastated Ireland, sending thousands of immigrants to seek a new life in America. They brought their traditions of celebrating Halloween as we know it, and it became a national event. This is when Americans started trick-or-treating. In the late 1800's, newspapers and political leaders decided to make Halloween a "nice" holiday, and encouraged people to not dress in grotesque costumes. Neighborhood parties and get-togethers with games and food became popular. In the 1920s and 1930s, more trickery was afoot, with pumpkin stompings to escalated vandalism. A "knock-a-dilly" is when someone knocks on your door and runs away before you open it. In the 50's, leaders managed to quell the violence, and Halloween took on a "nice" twist, with family-oriented trick-or-treating and parties at schools. For more information on Halloween, check out these sites: http://www.retroactive.com/oct98/hawtrads.html http://www.jackolanterns.net/ http://www.geocities.com/~huathe/festivals.html http://www.historychannel.com/exhibits/halloween/index.html http://www.tartans.com/samhain.html -.x.x.x.- tricky sidewalk by pinguino (pinguino@inker.com) fake blood splashed across my shoes they have holes in the soles and no laces the masked protagonist giggles quietly pikachu's batteries are dead blood seeps from between the zippers yellow scraps flutter across the yard costumed ghouls whistle by green eyes glued to a sugary bait unseeing the present matters not i found my laces tied in a neat bow -.x.x.x.- Interview with Ian Moss by pinguino (pinguino@inker.com) Here's an interview with Ian Moss, a local DJ in Toronto and a friend of Penguin Palace! pinguino: How did you start out in the rave scene, and what you led to DJing? ian: I went to my first rave five years ago with a girlfriend and got sucked into the culture. Heard local DJs 2-3 times a week. I live in Toronto, so raves here get pretty mega pretty fast. I got tired of hearing mixtapes and trainwrecks so I thought I'd have a go at it. I have a lot of friends with decks so I bought a crummy pair of Geminis with even worse needles off this guy I knew through IRC and borrowed a mixer from my cousin. I had no idea what I wanted to play. I knew I liked booty and ghetto tech, as well as electro. I had heard that electro was pretty hard to beat-match, but whatever, I found it easy. pinguino: Was your cousin a local DJ as well? Who taught and influenced your early mixes? ian: My cousin wasn't actually a DJ, he just had a mixer no one really taught me. The thing about DJs is they can't teach you anything. I had a friend that played locally and in Detroit. He played electro. I messed around on his tables a few times and all he ever said to me was "lock up the high hats." I had no idea what he was talking about. I've been involved in music most of my life, one way or another, and had a pretty keen sense of timing and rhythm before DJing. I was teaching guitar in a small jazz studio. I knew basically how to beat-match and practiced that with my turntables for a while. pinguino: Do you incorporate jazz into any of your mixes? ian: I used to. I played a lot of jazzy house. pinguino: What do you play now? ian: Kevin Yost, Joe Claussel, Keri Chandler type stuff. I play deeper garage, I guess you'd call it. Lately I've been less and less interested in playing out. I just like throwing tracks together, playing at home. I have no interest in the rave scene and mixed tapes and cds are done. I like radio sessions more than clubs. The thing is back in the early to mid 90s DJs would make mixed tapes to draw a larger crowd but really, in a city where raves, at one point, would bring in 16,000 kids a weekend you don't need that kind of exposure anymore and high profile studio cds get boring. If I wanna hear a track, I'll buy the vinyl. pinguino: What about online mixes to draw an international audience? ian: You'd think that would work; I used to stream in real-audio a lot. I don't really care who listens, as long as I'm enjoying it. It's not a very lucrative business, unless you're a superstar. pinguino: So what burnt you out on the rave scene? ian: I got tired of greedy promoters packing kids like sardines in unsafe venues while they wrote off dehydration as a water expense. The problem with any big city is an even larger suburban surrounding, so what happens is, you get these morons in the suburbs who have nothing better to do than tail-gate at a local variety store while they drink away brain cells and carry their high-school thug attitude into what was a generally peaceful environment. Kids at raves are too stupid to be angry. Peace and love and happiness, right? Really, a rave wasn't anything different than Woodstock 99 at that time - lots of crystal, lots of thugs (or so they thought they were). That and the green eyed monster got to be too much. pinguino: What's the underground scene like in Toronto? Does it exist? Here in California we can escape out to the desert for our parties. ian: You can't. Raves haven't been illegal here for years, since the early 90s. They're often held in government convention centers. How do you escape that? What has happened though is that the cats that started this scene, the ones who generally have a clue as to what's going on have pushed the rest of us into the club scene. Toronto has an incredible club scene, rivaling perhaps London's. pinguino: People here seem to be getting sick of busted events and will move over to clubbing. ian: The promoters that started the first warehouse parties are bringing in names like Richie Hawtin to the same crowd only at a more intimate gathering. Clubs here, good clubs, are open until 5 or 6am. I was surprised when I went to the Motor Lounge in Detroit to find it closing at 2am. pinguino: Where do people hear you? ian: CKLN university radio. University stations here play the only good music. Universities like U of T, Ryerson, Macmaster have excellent shows. A lot of pretty big local names host them. Marcus, a local D and B guy hosted a show for a long time at U of T. The big names here own record stores and host shows. Play da Record is owned by Jason Palma, local celebrity, you'll see his name on 4 or 5 flyers a week. I think Mystikal Influence owns Eastern Bloc. A lot of the Toronto drum and bass guys used to be really big in the US, but now it seems the house cats are popular. pinguino: House is very popular, maybe because MTV jumped all over it. ian: We don't get MTV here, but we've had this really bad dance show called Electric Circus played on Much Music. It's been on for a decade at least. It does its best to exploit the scene. It's great, all these wankers dress like tools on the show, so kids think it's cool and show up like that at clubs to find out club kids don't really dress like that. pinguino: Doing anything special for the holiday? ian: There were a couple parties on the weekend, but all I've really heard about is the Roxy Blu tomorrow with Carl Craig. He is a pretty awesome DJ. He started Planet E Records in Detroit. He also was a key motivator and co-ordinator of the Detroit Electronic Music Festival. Apparently, he received some sort of honor from the city. pinguino: What was your favorite event ever? ian: There's a few, and most of them involve Richie Hawtin. Richie is friends with some promoters here, and played a pretty nice little pub in the middle of his De909 tour. pinguino: Is he your favorite DJ? ian: He's awesome, live he's pretty good. It depends, sometimes he just plays some really hard techno which gets kind of annoying but I've never seen anyone tame a crowd for 10 minutes on just a 909. He plays it like it's an instrument, it's really impressive. I went to a Poor Boy party in Detroit in 97, that was pretty good. That was the first time I saw DJ Godfather - probably the best booty DJ ever. If you wanna see booty, go to Detroit. Godfather would drop vinyl on top of vinyl, he couldn't get it off the decks fast enough. pinguino: Well, thanks for the interview you gave us today. Any shoutouts you wanna give? ian: Respect to matt (Muerte) and all of Canada! -.x.x.x.- Halloween Dress-up 2001 by Flippersmack Who's dressing up as what this year? Pinguino - Queen Amidala from Star Wars Episode I SlapAyoda - Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars Episode VI: RoTJ Joy Knoblock - 50's Girl Melinda Ambill - Kitty Cat Kilna - Pirate Skrike - 70's Pimp Panacea - Thief +-----------------------------------------------------+ Flippersmack (c) 2001 Flippersmack All Rights Reserved. Flippersmack does not condone any of the acts in this collection of writings. We tearfully implore you to stop terrorizing the mops.