it's getting darker earlier and the sun's rising later. that means less light to bounce from you to the sun to the moon to the earth to me, back around to you and the sun again. less light to influence our emotions, too little to see the scars and stretch marks. there's more time for the darkness to enter -- time when nature gives not enough light to hold *your* interest in keeping your eyes open, when you naturally reflect into yourselves -- but it means more time for *me* to stay out at night, witness the bad element, wait for the full moon to blast its cold energy at me with furious might. with eyes open, i absorb it into my times and places, it absorbs me as well -- realizing i fucked pee wee herman in female form -- forgetting to tell someone that they're violating my personal space because they're teaching me something -- teaching me how to avoid my own precious will -- teaching me to absorb the full moon's light -- leaving me forgetful of where i am. am i a good listener? it's what i've been trained to be -- shoot your light right into my receptacle -- it's not exactly a garbage can, it sort of recycles -- try throwing in a chicken. try a lambchop. how about some paper? got a blender? yeah, throw me a howitzer. spy plane? shoot it in me, i'll grind it up and spit it right back at you -- no, it never gets full, or hasn't yet.. i wouldn't want to be around when it does -- don't clog the system, there's something that just won't process -- no, shut up, i've had enough -- look out, here it comes -- it's FLOWERS OF DISRUPTION #24 THE ZINE FOR TASHA AND ANJEE and i'm in love with the sound of the gri nding whipp ing ma shing me tal throwing sli cing shards of elec tric hate to sub section ed whirlwinds whipping mashing metal clink in the orifice tra ding off lover's lane for a piece of pie in the sky of chee se, the moon, the reflec tor on the back of my garbage man's truck, driving down the street until STOP or doesn't it? no, i get hit, ouch! i scream, but i'm really just happy inside as i can feel the STOP there's no blood, blood isn't that important on the grand scale of things, because it's really just light that's important anyway. without light, we wouldn't see things, and certainly different kinds of light have different smells, and it's never been proven, but i'm sure that the way that light particles vibrate is what creates a certain thing called Sound and touch is our interpretation of how any grouping of light particles feel -- what are quarks? light. what is light? it's the brightness that constitutes our existence -- we're not striving for happiness or the solution -- the happiness IS the solution, and it's all around us -- just be awake during the day, sleep during the night, and it will all figure itself out -- what's so beautiful about the night sky, anyway? the blackness? no, it's the light -- the stars -- without the stars, there would be no blackness, we would just see farther until we saw more stars, but STOP we're too close to the city, the gas stations and restaurants and cars and spotlights and bank security cameras and flashlights and parking lots beam their energy up into the sky -- it's quite a waste, because i could be absorbing it all into my eyes and ears and my nose and feet, too because they can feel things just as well. [but if you just wait a minute we'll clear the earth's atmosphere and get far enough away that our bumper is the greatest place to see the glowing beacons of hardcore porn] [is it my hair that smells bad, or my illustrious handjob?] [i'll tell you what smells bad, it's that dumb hairdye.] [i washed that out months ago.] [take it out of your freezer already, it's about time for the embalming.] { { { { IT'S STILL IN THE FREEZER?? } } } } { { {{ EMBALMING. } }}} } i can't believe we were that negligent; leaving my body in the freezer for that long -- i could have died, in fact i was dead, but that's something different -- and my friends would come to look at me there, and not do anything about the mess, because i was bleeding all over the place STOP blood is just light, and so is my body. let's rework that one. [ TAKE TWO ] i can't believe we were that negligent; leaving my body in the freezer for that long -- i could have stopped reflecting energy, in fact i had almost completely degenerated into an unhuman form of flesh and gore -- and my old friends would come to watch my body decompose, and not do anything about my unkempt state, because i was running out of any willpower. i wanted to sit up from the freezer and just beat my arms upon their chests for being such heartless, cold freaks, but i couldn't muster up the energy -- it had simply been drained so much by THAT STUPID GUY AT THE TABLE WHO KEPT REPEATING HIMSELF ABOUT or THOSE STUPID GUYS AT THOSE TABLES ALL THE FUCKING TIME WHO KEEP REPEATING THEMSELVES MORE THAN THEY CAN EVER REALIZE BECAUSE THEY'VE REALLY EXHAUSTED ANY VALUE ANYMORE AND NEED TO MOVE ON AND LIVE A DIFFERENT LIFE ..EXPEL A DIFFERENT TYPE OF ENERGY ..ABSORB SOME POSITIVE INFLUENCE ..FEED THE CHLOROPHYLL OF THE SOUL "IT'S MY GREEN MACHINE THAT WASN'T A DREAM" [apples in stereo?!?#@%$] "LICK THE TABLETOP, MAN, IT'S LIKE THE BACK OF ONE 'A DEM TOADS" "I DID ENOUGH OF THAT IN COLLEGE MAN." "WELL YOU'RE NOT IN COLLEGE ANYMORE, LOSER, SO EITHER DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT TO DO WITH YOUR LIFE OR KILL YOURSELF." college is the darkest place in the human environment. it is an establishment that institutionalizes the right of people to expose as much of their bodies to as much moonlight as possible {and maybe that's why they drink so much beer}. so if you're going to college sit by the window. and if your class doesn't have a window leave right away and sit next to a tree because it will talk to your soul about things that you don't know. because you're not a tree. and your soul and the tree will become friends in the sunlight... SUN SUUUN - SUN ttt / tttttt / / | rrrrrrr / / eeeeeeee / / ee| |ee / | | | | you & yer soul #|#|# you & yer soul you & yer soul |__conversation___| as we're riding in the back of that great big garbage truck to the sky. ŠÕÕª .-. Š»ÕÕÕº Šª Š»ÕÕÕÕº ŠÕª ŠŠÕÕÕÕÕÕÕª | | this was an †† †† †† ŠÕª † † †ÕÕ† ††† | | honestly bad †»ÕÕÕº †† †† † † ŠÕÕÕÕ†Õ† † † ††† | | time-waster †† †† †† † † † † † † † †»ÕÕÕÕÕÕÕº | | email-box †† ŠÕÕÕÕÕª †ŠÕÕª † † † † † † »»» | | filler »º »ÕÕÕÕÕº »»ÕÕºÕº »ÕÕÕÕ»Õº »ÕÕº »»ÕÕÕÕÕÕÕº | | from .----------------------------------------------------------| | trilobyte `----------------------------------------------------------`-' flodis / flowers of disruption #2x / 2x.09.99 / trilobyte@hoe.nu tell your friends to mine for theirs with flodis