__ / \ /____\ .________/][][][\_______. \___________ __________/ ! / /!/ //!\ \! __!_\ ! / /_/ // \\ \ \_____ / __ // /\ \\ \_____ \ / / / // ____ \\ \____\ \ /_/ /_//_/ \_\\_\______\ T-File_10________March_1_2005 Go Forth and Wait: A play in one scene By Jokester Characters: DAVE: The hero of the scene. Your absolute, everyday teenager with a tolerance for the events around him. DIANE: Dave's sister. A complete airhead, and the darling of the family. MOM: Their Mother. Adores Diane, ignores Dave. Voice is constantly perky. DAD: Their Father. Loves mom, immerses himself in the event of life. EDDIE: Dave's best friend. Best described as an evil version of Eddie on "Leave it to beaver". Props Needed: Couch Table A few chairs Television Set A pair of sneakers (old). Door Fishtank Garbage can (large) SCENE OPENS [Dave is doing his homework on the dining room table. Diane is lying on the couch, watching the fishtank. All is quiet for a very slight pause. A sneaker, dropped from above the view of the audience, falls onto the stage.] DAVE: (Looks up, and watches Diane for a second. His eyebrow raises, then he speaks.) Uh, Diane? DIANE: Mm, yes? DAVE: You're watching the fish tank. (Looks back down again.) DIANE: (Squeak) Oh. (Turns herself around on the couch and starts watching the TV on her stomach.) [MOM comes in, stage left. She strikes a Mrs. Brady Happy pose.] DAVE: (Looks up, and starts to raise his right hand, pointing.) Ah, Mom.. [It's too late. She walks over near her beloved Diane and clasps her hands.] MOM: And how's my favorite little darling? DIANE: (Still watching TV) Condusive, ma. MOM: That's Wonderful, dear! [She then walks out through stage left, ignoring Dave.] DAVE: [Still with his hand up on its elbow, still pointing up.] Ochtch. [Suddenly, there's a knock on the door. It opens. It's DAD in his business suit. And is HE happy. Dave looks up. Diane continues to watch TV.] DAD: Honey, I'm concious! [Takes off his hat and throws it into the garbage.] [Mom comes running in. Her arms are turned up so her loose fists are facing Dad. She twists as she walks.] MOM: Hi, Dear! DAD: (Arms outstetched, he drops the briefcase) Aloha! [Convoluted Muffle kiss. Improvisation time. Actors can be as exaggerated as they please.] [They turn to Diane. Dave by this time has looked back down at his homework, and is thinking about a problem.] MOM AND DAD: Hello, Daughter! DIANE: (Turns to them, sits up on couch) Hello, Parents! [Diane gets up. All three hug. Dave starts writing again.] PAUSE [They break apart.] DAD: Do you know what today is? DIANE: I have a concept. It's my genesis anniversary! DAD: Right! And your gifts are waiting outside! [Dave is slightly interested. He looks up now.] DIANE: Really? Wow! [She runs to the door. Dad and Mom look at each other and smile. She clasps her hands.] Oh wow! A Shetland pony and a new Porsche! HORSE SOUND EFFECT. [Diane runs out the door. Dad and Mom walk out after her. Dave stands up and walks to the middle of the stage. He's slightly pertrubed.] DIANE: (Offstage) Wow! This is rad! HORSE SOUND EFFECT. DAVE: (Looks to audience) Does this happen to you? For MY birthday, they gave me a lava lamp. Sibling rivaly is a cruel thing, but sibling annihilation is another thing altoghether. (pause) It's Miller time. [Eddie appears at the window.] EDDIE: Hi, Dave! DAVE: Hi, Eddie. [Eddie climbs in through the window. He walks over to Dave.] EDDIE: (Gesturing towards window) Yer windows have no glass. DAVE: Whatever. EDDIE: Yeah. Hey, your sister got a shetland pony. DAVE: I'm well aware of that, Eddie. I'm not particuarly happy about it. EDDIE: Why? It's great. DAVE: Not if you had gotten a waste of a present for YOUR birthday. This is sick. (Starts looking up.) EDDIE: What're you doing? DAVE: I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop. [The other shoe falls from above the audience's view. Dad opens the door and looks inside.] DAD: Hey, son.... DAVE: (Looks down and back at him.) Jes? DAD: Mind if we clear out your private clubhouse for a stable? The garage's ceiling is too low. DAVE: (Puts his hands on his hips and says sarcastically) No. I think that's just dandy. DAD: Thanks. (Puts his head back in, closes the door.) DAVE: See what I mean? EDDIE: Yeah. But look at the bright side. DAVE: What bright side? EDDIE: The skit's over. LIGHTS OUT