=====[ Klunk - Issue 07 - 02/24/96 ]========================================
                  
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               $$$$$$&s. $$$  ,$$$ $$$. ,$$$ $$$   $$$ $$$$$$&s. b3
               $$$   $$$ `$$$$$$$' `$$$$$$$' $$$   $$$ $$$   $$$ 

                         <klunk> it's all good for sex

 =====[ Editorial - Belial ]=================================================

        I never "officially" killed Klunk.  It may have looked like it and I
 did believe that I did at some point, but now I am back.  Why?  Because, I
 had plenty of fun when I was still writing Klunk when I was _really_ new to
 the whole "zine scene".  

        A lot has changed since Klunk 6 and Klunk 7.  For the good?  Yeah, I
 think so.  I can't really complain.  I've made 3 really excellent friends 
 during that time and I wouldn't trade that for the world.  

        Just to answer some of the questions you may not have asked:

        No, Klunk is not a branch of Slinky.

        No, Klunk will not be going with any kind of monthly format.  Suffice
 it to say that Klunk will be out "whenever".

        No, I'm not a hermaphrodite. 

        Yes, this is for real. 

        If you are or would be interested in writing a little piece for
 Klunk, then I prompt you to go for it.  All you have to do is get in touch
 with me and I'll take a look at your work.

        Enough of that, lets get on with this.

 =====[ Klunk Stuff - Belial ]===============================================

 Greetings to - Cerkit, Metal Chick, Edicius, Lucifer, Mindcrime, Grey Hawk,
                and Mogel. 

 (A special group of people that have helped me out along the way.)

 You can still get Klunk at these boards:

                    Avalon - 908 739/4274 
                  Alderaan - 908 224/8780 
         That Stupid Place - 215 985/0462
            Alfheim Forest - 908 473/1287

 (Isn't it strange how most of those boards begin with "a"?)
 
 =====[ Dear, Are You Alive - Belial ]=======================================

        "Dear, dear, are you alive?" Al asked, shoving his wife in the back.

        "No, now leave me alone." his wife said, rolling deeper into her
 blankets.

        "Oh, because you weren't moving and I thought that you might be dead
 or something." Al said.

        "I'm talking, do you still think that I am dead?"

        "Well, no.  It's just that... are you sure you aren't dead?  You
 really looked dead just laying there like that." Al asked, scratching his
 head in confusion.

        "Yes, I'm sure I'm not dead.  Don't you think I would know something
 as important as that?  Now stop asking stupid questions and go back to
 sleep."

        "Alright, but I'll be watching!"

        "I'm sure you will be, dear." stated his wife, yawning.

        After about an hour, Al woke up and looked over at his sleeping wife.
 "Hmm.  I sure hope she wasn't lying when she said she wasn't dead.  It isn't
 healthy for two people who are in love to lie to each other.  I think I'll
 just ask her one more time." Al thought to himself.

        "Honey, honey." Al said, shoving at his wife's back once again.

        "What is it, Al?" she sounded angry.

        "Well, do you remember when we were watching Jenny Jones the other
 night?"

        "Yes."

        "Remember how she said that two people who love each other shouldn't
 lie to each other?"

        "Yeah, and you point is?" she asked.

        "Well, I just want to make sure that you love me."

        "And you want me to do what?"

        "I want you to tell me the truth when I ask you a question." Al said.

        "When have I _not_ told you the truth?" 

        "Before."

        "Before what?"

        "Before when I asked you if you were dead or not."

        "I told you I wasn't."

        "Yeah, but you sure do look dead."

        "Are you an idiot?" his wife asked after a moment.

        "No." Al replied, puzzled by her question.

        "Are _you_ lying to me?"

        "No."

        "Then why would you think that I am lying to you?"

        "I don't know, it's just that you looked so dead."

        "Well, I'm not.  So now can we please go back to bed?"

        "I guess so, goodnight."

        "Don't wake me up again!"

        "Alright, alright, I won't."

        After that, they slept peacefully.  However, Al's mind was still
 troubled.

        "Dear..."

 ============================================================================

        It's Klunk, It's Klunk, It's in my head... 

        Everyone call my voice mailbox at 1 800 925/9999 ##315 and tell me
 what you thought of Klunk's comeback.

        It's toast, later dudes.

 =====[ eof ]================================================================