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                  l   o  n  g  d  a  r  k  t  u  n  n  e  l
                                productions


#095 - [ She ]
       [ jvaldez ]


She sits across from me, in a room filled with laughter and smoke. Merely feet
from me, this lovely brunette with grecian olive eyes and a smile that would
make an old man weep, lays worlds away from me in reality.

Two different people. Two different backgrounds. Two different lives. Two
different entities.

As she stands up to stretch, I admire her body in wonder, trying not to stare
but also pondering a few things as I glance her from head to toe.

I know, in my heart, and in hers, we wouldn't ever be together. I know she
would never allow it.

I know _I_ would never allow it.

I don't know her name, because it's not important. This is not the first girl
I have admired and hated all at once. It is said hatred is the sister of
ignorance and in this case, that particular relationship suites my needs all
to well.

So pretty.
So perfect.
So delicate.

I want to kill her.
It's not a sick psycho fetish.
It's the stark reality and cold bleak facts of life. It is she, the woman,
that makes us males do the horrible things we do.

Why do we quest for power?
Why do we fight each other?
Why do we create modern caste systems?
Why slavery?
Why do we go out of our way for the comfort of a lady ruining our lives, our
financial status, and our physical health?

Sex.

Sex, rules all. It is the most obsessive drug on the market, and has been so
since man was created or evolved (this is not our argument.) Sex pushes us,
makes us want them more and more, and there is simply nothing we can do about
it. Priests want to. Presidents want to. I want to. You want to. Can we stop
it?

Of course not.

Our genetics do not make it possible to do such a thing. People say life is
about living. I say it's about reproduction. The urge to reproduce is such a
powerful drive that it contaminates the very lives we try to lead and voids
out any reasonable judgement.

Without it, we feel weak. We feel like nothing. We feel unloved.

Why nature, why? Why did you do this to us. Damn us all to be addicted to
some hopeless dream of meeting the 'right somebody' to start a family with.
Women know they're desires more then men and realize that all they want to do
is have kids. Where as most women will disagree with that and say they want to
do this this and this, let's be honest here - what's the last goal? Pop out a
few rugrats and be on our way to our next reincarnation.

When they call life on earth, 'mother nature', I now get the true meaning. To
lead such a screwed up existence in search of a empty nothingness, nature has
to be a bitch.

jvaldez

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      Long Dark Tunnel 2002. - http://ldt.aguk.co.uk - ldt@hushmail.com 
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