_____ | | _____ _____ _______ | |___| |---| `---._____ `| | | _ | | | | _ | | | | | | | | | | --------------------------------------- | | | | | | | | | --------------------------------------- | | | | | | | | | .. [ Luna Digizine ] .. ____ |____ |___| |___` | `---' `---- `---' `---' -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Luna Digizine Volume 1, Issue 2 - Copyright Gerritt Baer / Luna 1996 Luna is a textfile publication that may be distributed freely, anywhere, in any form as long as the contents herein remain unchanged. " Cause out on the road, theres no place, i'd rather be, then with my friends, havin fun, i'm talkin bout goodtimes. " - Sprung Monkey -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (A) %% welcome I can be angry too!! wee, well I was pretty mad when writing this issue of luna, it was fun anyway. I promise next issue will be sunshine and lollypops, if you don't like that, then don't read it, i'll alternate moods or something :) Have fun reading, not much for an editorial this time, bye. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- _________ ___ ________ ____ ________ __________________ | __)____| |------- `------.__________ `| | | _ | | | _ _ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | _______ |_______ |______| |______` | `------`------'------`------'------`------'------`------' %% table of contents A :: welcome 1 :: the bad squirrel and me -- (story) 2 :: dumbass -- (poem) 3 :: you people suck -- (opinion) Z :: closing -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (1) %% the bad squirrel and me It was a dark stormy night .. asdlkfja hmm, no its not, its a nice sunny day, your in florida silly. Oh yeah, dorf, ok, hmm, so it was a nice sunny day and there was this nasty ass squirrel. It was dressed in a black leather jacket, spurred boots, and it had a rusty steel knife in its little paw. Thats pretty scarry. I know! So anyway, this squirrel was like really mean, he had a mean streak a mile long, er, a meter long. Nasty teeth, red eyes and he didn't clip his toenails either. Nasty. So one day I met this squirrel and casually passed by him, not daring to stare for fear for my life. Hey, stupid! he chittered. Yes, I responded, trying not to have any tinge of emotion on my breath. What you lookin at? Uhhhh, nothing sir, just passing by. Yeah, Yeah, sure asshole, i've seen your kind before. Listen bub, I don't like you, so stay outta my way. And with that he cut my knee with his tiny stiletto. OUCH! Damnit squirrel, that hurt. You'll stop yer wining if ya know whats good for ya. Not wanting any more trouble, I stepped on his head, crushing his skull and vertibrae and spurting blood all over the sidewalk. And I just walked away, whistling as I went. The End. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (2) %% dumbass I don't take shit from the people in blue, I don't take shit from morons like you, I won't take anything, that you force on me, I won't take part in, your communist democracy, I can't deny, the hate I aim towards you, I can't rely, on my own industry. You suck life from men, You won't be saved, For the pain you bring to us. Technology breeds robots, You breed robots, You will be destroyed, by your technology. The day will come, when you will fall, Your iron walls, topple and melt, I will be there, lauging in your face, The time has returned for human domination, Your creation destroys all, it will destroy you. And I will laugh, and dance and sing, We will be again, a people of God. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (3) %% you people suck Here is a nice little list composed by myself of a bunch of things that really suck. 1 - fags teaching - damnit you stupid faggots, if I ever find out your teaching my kid that being gay is ok ill hang you up by your nuts on the flagpole for the crows. 2 - pigs - busting kids for skateboarding, trying to have a little fun, makes you morons feel good or something? Do your job, go after the real criminals, not kids trying to have fun. 3 - ignorant people - anyone who thinks my opinions are stuipd or without base, you are the worst of all. Get a life and stop criticizing everyone, assholes. 4 - gossip collumnists - don't you people have anything better to do then spy on people trying to be normal? 5 - politics - fuck politics, they suck, assholes. 6 - busniessmen - see ignorant people. Those are just a few of the large list of things that suck. If you disagree, you suck, asshole. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- (Z) %% closing Time to alt-f4 I guess, I had fun writing this one, and the first one for that matter. Anyway, goodbye. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Eeyore (Gerritt Baer) can be contacted via email (oceans@gate.net) or snailmail (1189 Hillsboro Mile #6, Hillsboro Beach Fl 33062). --------------------------------------------------------------------------