qn, d&&&&&&&&P ;P d&b d&&P ;P d' d' d' d&; d' ;P ;&,e&q, .c&&q, ;P`&; ;P .c&&q, ,c&&q, d' dP~ `b ;P' `& d' `&; d';P' `& ;P' `d ;P ;P ;P dB&&&&P ;P `&;;P dB&&&&P d P d&&P d' d' d' &, , d' `&d' &, , &, .,d' d&&P &&& &&& `&&&P' d&&P `P `&&&P' `&&&P , ,e&&&q,a ,nP' d' ;P' `d' "' d&&&P d' " ,c&&q, q&,e&q,e&q, q&P q&,e&q, ;P' ,c&&q, q&,e&q q&,e&q, ;P ;P' `d dP~ `B~ `b dP dP~ `b d' ;P' `& dP~ `P dP `b d' , d P ;P ;P ;P ;P ;P ;P ;P dB&&&&P ;P ;P ;P &, .,d' &, .,d' d' d' d' d' d' d' d' , &, , d' d' d' `Y&&&P' `&&&P' &&b ;P d&P &&b &&b d&P `&P' `&&&P' &&b &&b d&P odO$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.odO$|$Obo.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$Obo t h e n e o - c o m i n t e r n e l e c t r o n i c m a g z i n e I n s t a l l m e n t N u m b e r 7 4 .WE ARE THE 5th INTERNATIONAL .August 25th, 1999 .Editor: BMC .Writers: .Junior Haagis .BMC odO$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.odO$|$Obo.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$Obo ";P' Featured in this installment: `$ $ Weekly Horoscopes- Junior Haagis ;P Voyage From Atlantis c.ii- BMC d' ;P d'. .,;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;,"*,; EDITOR'S NOTE Komrades. Komrades. Komrades! In this new issue, the spotlight shines on Junior Haagis' new weekly feature, "Weekly Horoscopes," and also, the muthafuckin saga continues with the Atlantean serial. Komrades? Aside from that, I suppose I should update you all on the current debate of whether or not to change the name of "The Comintern" to "The Love." The pros and cons are obviously to all of you, so I won't get into particulars. If anyone has feedback on the decision, send me an email and let me know. odO$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.odO$|$Obo.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$Obo ";P' WEEKLY HOROSCOPES d' by Junior Haagis ;P d'. .,;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;,"*,; ARIES (March 21 - April 19) You know what you want to be doing with your life, so why aren't you doing it? Perhaps the rarest of opportunities continues to elude you. Could it be you lack the confidence, an adequate skill level, the necessary talent, or even average intelligence? If that's the case, not to worry; you're about to get the break you've been praying for. A quick and painless one between the third and fourth vertibrae. TAURUS (April 20 - May 20) A co-worker, in a disagreement, abruptly kicks you in the face. Your adrenileine rush is at a fever pitch, and you quickly shake off the effects of the blow. Laugh heartily, and promptly stomp his head into pablum. Afterwards, reward yourself. GEMINI (May 21 - June 20) Comes now the time when you should move on with your life and finally cease the grieving over the loss of loved ones. I mean, you did indirectly cause it. Remember? CANCER (June 21 - July 22) Guess what. You've got cancer. Consult a specialist. LEO (July 23 - August 22) Cheap cologne becomes you. An unenviable traight, but works in your case. Pat yourself on the back. VIRGO (August 23 - September 22) To your shock, you suddenly realize you're a 35 year old still-born baby (which explains a lot). LIBRA (September 23 - October 22) A headache just before bedtime quickly turns into a swollen lump on your temple by morning. It constantly pushes into your brain. Now for some reason, you believe you have to prove your superiority in,..well,.. just about everything. Any professional physician might tell you that you have advanced terminal terechonitus, but any amateur psycologist would say you're currently feeling inferior about something. But why? You have so much going for you. You've always been a match for anyone else's abilities. Stop comparing yourself to healthy, non-afflicted people. SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21) Do you rapture in the sensation of ignited kerosene trailing up to your buttocks? Then look to the horizon. True love comes your way. SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 21) Twelve toes with one of the extra two growing out of the cleft in your chin? At least get the one operation. Please! CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19) You have unresolved issues with your step-mother. You feel that somehow, by her intrusion, she is the reason why you feel alienated from your father. But it really resides in the fact that not having ever known your own mother, you feel some pent up frustrations caused by neglect and loss. And so you vent them against this surrogate parent figure. Be the first to offer an olive branch, and quickly put this ugliness behind you. Plus, now would be a good time to get that wart removed from your g-spot. AUQUARIUS (January 20 - Febraġry 18) I see in the near future, a can-opener bought at a garage-sale quickly leads to trikinosis poisoning. At the very least, haggle for a discount when you buy. Show the seller this horoscope as a bargaining aid. PISCES (February 19 - March 20) You learn, after reading a recent horoscope, about its obvious connection to the occult and Satan. Consult your neighbor's pets for tonight's instructions. odO$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.odO$|$Obo.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$Obo ";P' VOYAGE FROM ATLANTIS (chapter ii) d' by BMC ;P d'. .,;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;,"*,; With the blessing of our grandfather, Poseidon, Komrade B and I embarked on what might have easily been our final journey. We boarded the former king's own sub-water boat and pushed off toward the evil surface world. Suffice it to say that it was a terrible trip. First of all, I never should have let Komrade B drive the sub-water boat. He put a Sade (prounced shar-day) tape into the deck and was playing the music way too loud. Then he had to stop to go to the bathroom every half hour, and to top it all off, he rear-ended some sub-water truck at a red light. The trip was very short in terms of minutes and seconds, but it was eternal in measure of patience. When we reached the surface, we were outside of an extremely large building. This made Komrade B very angry, and he began kicking and punching himself until he became injured. I told him he needed to stay and protect the sub-water boat, which was a total lie because the sub-water boat would probably end up protecting him! Figuring that this was the castle of my mortal enemy, Proteus, I stormed the building, kicked the doors open, and beheld a most awesome sight. The room was filled with gigantic stone men that were about fifty feet tall. They moved very slowly, and while they were creating a battle plan, I castrated, decapitated, and dismembered every one of them with the Trident of Neptune. After I had vanquished my foes, I took note of the many pictures that hung on the walls, the sign that said "museum." The thought hit me that they may have actually been statues, and as this filled my mind, a swarm of normal-sized security guards were rushing me. They had a score of blades to my one, and I determined that I could only take half of them out. As the battle ensued, I took note of how much more difficult these opponents were, and as I felt my trident puncture the throat of an adversary, I further considered the mismatched fight. After several minutes, there were twelve officers left, and I was yet unscathed. As I thrusted the trident between the ribs of another foe, the pole snapped, and I was left unarmed against 11 viscious attackers. I imagined Komrade B sleeping inside the sub-water boat and wondered whether I would survive this encounter. odO$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.odO$|$Obo.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$Obo ___________________________________________________ |THE COMINTERN IS AVAILIABLE ON THE FOLLOWING BBS'S | |~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~| | BRING ON THE NIGHT (306) 373-4218 | | CLUB PARADISE (306) 978-2542 | | THE GATEWAY THROUGH TIME (306) 373-9778 | |___________________________________________________| | Website at: http://members.home.com/comintern | | Email BMC at: thebmc@home.com | |___________________________________________________| odO$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.$Obo.odO$|$Obo.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$.odO$Obo Copyright 1999 by The Neo-Comintern #74-08/25/99 All content is property of The Neo-Comintern. You may redistribute this document, although no fee can be charged and the content must not be altered or modified in any way. Unauthorized use of any part of this document is prohibited. All rights reserved. Made in Canada.