.x$$$$$$$$x.                                     .d$$$$$$$$$$$$b.
      .x$$$$$$$$$$$$$$xx.                               .$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$.
    .$$$$$$$P~~~~4$$$$$$$$x                           .$$$$$$$P~~   ~~4$$$$$$,
   .$$$$$$P~       ~~4$$$$$$                          $$$$$$$~           `$$$'
   $$$$$$P             $$$$$x                         $$$$$$P
   $$$$$$b              `$$$$.         x$$$$$$$$x     $$$$$$b
   $$$$$$$b.             `$$$'       x$$$$$P4$$$$$x   $$$$$$$b.         ..
   `$$$$$$$$bx.                    .$$$$$P~  ~4$$$$$. `$$$$$$$$b..   .d$$$
    `$$$$$$$$$$$$bxx..            .$$$$$P      4$$$$$. `$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$'
      `$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$bx.       $$$$$P        4$$$$$  `4$$$$$$$$$$$$P'
        `4$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$bx.   $$$$$b        d$$$$$  d$$$$$$$P~~~
           `4$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$  `$$$$$b      d$$$$$' d$$$$$$P'
              `4$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$  `$$$$$b.  .d$$$$$' d$$$$$$$'
                 `$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$    `$$$$$bd$$$$$'   $$$$$$$P  mu?   x$$$$bx
                  `$$$$$$$$$$$$$'      `$$$$$$$$'     $$$$$$$b       d$' `$$$x
                   4$$$$$$$$$$$'                      `$$$$$$$$bx..  ``'.xd$$$
  .               d$$$$$$$$$$'     .xxd$$$$$bxx.       `$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$'
  $.            d$$$$$$$$$$'    .xd$$$$$$$$$$$$$$bx.    `4$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$'
  $$b.       .d$$$$$$$$$$'  .xd$$$$$$P~~   ~~4$$$$$$$bx.   ~~4$$$$$$$$$$P~~
  $$$$bx..xd$$$$$$$$$$$'  .d$$$$$P'            `4$$$$$$$bxx.           .x$
   $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$'  .$$$$$P'                  `4$$$$$$$$bxx.. .xd$$$$'
    ~4$$$$$$$$$$$P~~   $$$P~~                         `4$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$P'
                                                         `4$$$$$$$$P~~

                   Sloths over Ethiopia #0003 $$ May 19, 1996
         Sloths over Ethiopia is a dto [doomed to obscurity] production

  $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$

        soe was a contorted lad.  he got to be that way by being vietnamese
  but living in ethiopia because that's where his mother, who worked for the
  united nations, was stationed.  anyway, soe was a contorted lad, and
  somehow he wound up at a liberal arts college in central illinois.  nobody
  really knew how or why he wound up there.

                        THESE ARE THE CHRONICLES OF SOE.

  $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$

                        the chronicles of soe, number 1.

        while studying, or at least purporting to be a student, at the liberal
  arts school in illinois, somehow soe was assigned to a work study position
  at the school cafeteria.

        soe proved to be a massively inefficient worker.  he was incredibly
  slow and he talked with a vietnamese-by-way-of-ethiopian accident that was
  extremely hard to understand.  you see, his speech was understandable
  enough, except nobody could ever figure out what the hell he was talking
  about.  an example of a common dialogue on the streets with soe was:

        "so, soe, how's it goin'?"

        "oh, everything terrible.  mess."

        "really?  why's that?"

        "oh, you know, man, it is."

        anyway, soe was a lousy worker.  once one of the other student
  workers accidentally spilled a lot of coffee and mildly burnt himself and
  soe and another guy had to mop it up.  soe was so slow and so apparently in
  awe of the power of the mop, however, that he didn't accomplish anything.
  apparently he had never seen a mop before in his life.  the other guy was
  just very lazy, but soe was simply baffled by the mop, or, at the very
  least, he did a very good job of demonstrating shock and befuddlement.

  $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$

  we have an ftp site for the Sloths Over Ethiopia files, it seems.  ftp to
  ftp.openix.com and in some directory off root go to /phorce/soe.  we have no
  idea why this is; you'd have to ask phorce.

  $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$

                   Sloths over Ethiopia #0003 $$ May 19, 1996
         Sloths over Ethiopia is a dto [doomed to obscurity] production

    Sloths over Ethiopia welcomes all submissions under 3k.  Any submissions
    over 3k will be returned because that's just way too damn long.  And for
    that matter, submissions should be limited to approximately 2,200 bytes.
     All Sloths over Ethiopia releases will be less than 5k, for no reason.

    You may reach us at Sloths over Ethiopia by mailing doomed@voicenet.com,
         the official address of dto [doomed to obscurity] productions.

    Check out other great releases by dto [doomed to obscurity] productions,
    which are practically guaranteed to be better than anything you may ever
    see in Sloths over Ethiopia, which is really just pretty fucking stupid.

     Sloths over Ethiopia is dedicated to the memory of the late Soe Naing.

  $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$$ $$ $$$ $$$ $$$