================================================================= Stuck In Traffic "Current Events, Cultural Phenomena, True Stories" Issue #19 - October, 1996 Contents: Voting Is Not Enough: As the November elections draw near, citizens are constantly urged to "get out and vote" as if that were their only function in America's democratic process. But voting is actually the least important part of politics. What should the average American do if he or she really wants to make a difference? Why We Need The Macarena: An analysis of all the factors that contribute to The Macarena's success. How does one take a simple pop song and turn it into a global dance craze? Pigs In A Blanket: Social critics have to tread lightly when offering criticism. Sometimes the world just isn't ready for our insights. ==================================== Current Events Voting Is Not Enough As the November 5th elections draw near, you will be inundated by countless people and organizations with pleas for you to "get out and vote" on election day. You'll hear it from newspaper journalists. You'll hear it from newscasters. You'll hear it from the League of Women Voters. You'll hear it from MTV. You'll hear it from preachers. And of course you'll hear it from the candidates themselves. They will tell you that voting is both a right and a duty in this great democracy of ours. They will tell you that this is the most important part of politics and will tell you to be proud of yourself for voting. I'll add my voice to the movement. I encourage everyone to vote. Any participation in politics is better than none at all. But voting for candidates is the tiniest, least important part of politics. Politics is far more than voting. Politics is far more than even government. Voting is nothing more than a "rubber stamp" of approval on a menu of choices and decisions that other people have already made for you. If the political process delivers a menu of nothing but bad choices for you to choose from, voting doesn't matter much. As Plato put it: "One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors." Judging by the choices we are offered in this year's elections, many would agree that we are paying the penalty for not participating enough in the political process. And we should not delude ourselves into thinking otherwise just because we have "done our duty" by voting. How can common people, people who are not professional politicians, participate in politics in such a way that they can make real difference? First, we can set the agenda that politicians must respond to. We can do this by never passing up an opportunity to speak up about the issues. For some reason in the United States, it has become unseemly, or at least unfashionable, to discuss political issue in casual conversation with our friends and neighbors. This has to change fast. Today, there are many ways for us to voice our opinions beyond our family and friends, if we would just use them. We can join single interest issue groups. Although lobbying organizations have a bad reputation these days, there is nothing inherently wrong with the concept of people rallying around an organization devoted to a single issue. There are also many opportunities to speak for ourselves as individuals. Call-in talk shows, letters to the editor of your local newspaper and magazines, and "viewer commentaries" on TV news casts are perfect vehicles for not only commenting on the current issues being discussed but also for raising issues that no one is yet talking about. And as talk show hosts and newspaper editors will be quick to tell you, they hear from the same few people over and over again. Make sure one of the people the politicians hear is you! Speaking out in public forums like newspapers and talk radio is effective because it reaches out to everyone in the audience. And although elected officials follow these forums with great devotion, nothing beats contacting your representatives directly. Call them on the phone, write them a letter, send them a fax, send them e-mail. If you don't know how to contact your representatives. Find out. If you don't know who your representatives are, you better find out quick because they are making decisions that affect you right now. In addition to speaking up for ourselves, we need to encourage diversity in the marketplace of ideas. We need to become more vigilant about attempts to restrict public discussion and political participation. The most visible example of this problem this year has been the Presidential debates, in which only two candidates were allowed on the debates despite the fact that there are no less than 6 candidates for President. And the problem is much deeper than the debates. Obstacles like ballot access laws, voter registration laws, campaign finance laws routinely block people from participating in the electoral process of the country. The next level of participation in politics, is to become a part of the government yourself. Most people think of holding office as a full time career. But political office can and should be a part time job, especially at the local level. Think small. Most towns have many different citizen review boards set up to make sure the general population has input into local government decisions. Usually these are appointed positions and all you have to do is express an interest to your local representative to get appointed. Once in a position of this sort, you not only have a voice on the board's specific issue, you have an opportunity to speak out on a wide variety of issues because you will have much more direct access to the elected officials. And you establish credibility with the people in your town which will be a big help if you should ever decide to run for an elected office. But the most important part of politics has nothing to do with government at all. Politics is much bigger than government. And the dirty little secret that politicians would rather not admit to is that they are followers, not leaders. They can pass all the laws they want to address a problem, but none will be effective unless there are people willing to actually do the work. It is far better to volunteer time and money to your local food bank than it is to vote for a politician that promises "welfare reform." It is far better to "adopt" an immigrant family and teach them English and how things work in the U.S. than it is to vote for a politician that promises to "do something" about "illegal" immigrants. It is far better to start a neighborhood watch and teach yourself how to responsibly and safely handle a gun than it is to vote for a politician that promises to "get tough on crime." Selling cookies at a school's annual bake sale or volunteering a day of your time as a teacher assistant is much more effective way of helping a school than voting for a politician that promises to "improve education." Casting a vote is no substitute for actually working on a problem ourselves. =================================== Expand Your Horizons subscribe to Salon $5 single issue, $20/year Pat Hartman 305 W. Magnolia - Suite 386 Ft. Collins, CO 80521 =================================== ==================================== Cultural Phenomena Why We Need The Macarena It originated in Venezuela, 1993. It spread like wildfire through Spain. It has infiltrated most Spanish speaking countries in the world. In 1995, it hit the shores of the United States. You can find it in night clubs, retirement homes, high school gyms, and federal prisons. It is discussed on MTV and talk shows. It supports no less than three parasitical parodies. It is still growing. Women in Spanish speaking countries are naming their daughters after it. It is called "The Macarena". The Macarena is both a pop song and a dance craze. The song, at least the most popular versions of the song, is a simple straight-forward pop tune. It has a steady 4/4 beat suitable for dancing and a couple of verses followed by a minor key bridge which leads into the Big Finish. It has a vaguely Latin feel to it, officially categorized by the Powers That Be as "Pop-Flamenco." But mostly it's got that Universal Dance Hall style. It's about 3 1/2 minutes long, more or less the perfect length for a commercial pop song. A typical verse from the Spanish lyrics of the original version of the song: Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegria y cosa buena Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena Ehhhhhh, Macarena! Macarena tiene un novio que se llama Que se llama de apellido Vitorino Y en la jura da bandera del muchacho Se la dio con dos amigos Macarena, Macarena, Macarena Que le gusta los veranos de Marbella Macarena, Macarena, Macarena Que le gusta la movida guerrilera Macarena suena con el Corte Ingles Y se compra los modelos mas modernos Le gustaria vivir in Nueva York Y ligar un novio nuevo which, translated into English, means: Give your body pleasure Macarena Because your body is for giving it pleasure and good things Give your body pleasure Macarena Ehhhhhhh, Macarena Macarena has a boyfriend whose name is Whose name is Vitorino And during his military swearing in She got together with two of his friends. Macarena, Macarena, Macarena, Who likes the summers of Marbella Macarena, Macarena, Macarena, Who likes the guerilla lifestyle Macarena dreams of the Cortes Ingles (a high class dept. store) And she likes the most recent fashions She'd like to live in New York And trap a new boyfriend. It loses a little bit in the translation. One wonders what is meant by "the guerilla lifestyle," especially considering her estranged boyfriend is in the military. But obviously there's a corrupting dynamic at work in the relationship. The Americanized, "Bay Side Boys Mix" of the song has different, and much less clever, lyrics but a similar sentiment. Both versions of the song are about a beautiful women who is so full of life and life's pleasures that she can't help herself from dancing up a storm. There are hints that it's vaguely sinful to get this much pleasure out of dancing. It's about a woman who lives life too large for one man. It's about a women who attracts men like moths to a flame. And yet no one can find it in their heart to hold it against her. It's an ancient, ancient archetype under a new name. Madonna better watch out. Safe, unoffensive lyrics with just a hint of lust. An ancient archetype. The perfect Commercial format. All the necessary elements to turn this song into a Movement were there. All it needed was a little push. Well, a big push actually. The official public relations version of The Macarena's history goes like this: Several years ago, Antonio Romero, one of the members of Los Del Rio, was staying in Caracas, Venezuela. One night he was so inspired by watching an enthusiastic Flamenco dancer by the name of Diana Patricia that he rapped out an impromptu verse while she danced. This verse later became the basis for the Macarena song. Los Del Rio have been in the Spanish music scene since the 60's, publishing over 300 songs, mostly in the FlamencoPop genre. And when Los Del Rio published the song in 1993 through a regional Spanish record label, they had their first smash hit. But how did the Macarena make it from a regionally popular song to a world wide craze? Enter into the picture Bertelsmann A.G., a major global publishing company which operates in nearly every industrial country in the world. In the U.S. They own media heavy weights like Bantam/DoubleDay/Dell publishers, and RCA, Arista, and many other record labels. They also have TV and film production operations and are the European partners with America Online. Bertelsmann's mission is "to provide entertainment to the world and to be a home for creativity." In 1994, BMG Entertainment's (as they are known in the US) Latin Division bought the record company that owned the rights to The Macarena and began putting the full force of their publishing and entertainment muscle behind it, promoting the song worldwide. BMG targeted dance clubs with video screens and dance instructors so that club attendees could both see The Macarena dance in action and learn it from the club's instructors. They introduced The Macarena into Mexico, Columbia, Chile, Brazil, Argentina, and several select American cities. To account for cross cultural differences in various markets, Los Del Rio have recorded no less than 6 versions of the song. This year, the Macarena had developed a strong enough following that Los Del Rio toured the United States promoting the "Bayside Boys Mix" version of the song, which culminated into breaking through into MTV's playlist. But even a major global publishing company like BMG can't push a song like The Macarena (and therefore can't sell records) unless it fills a need or a hole in the marketplace. And that, I believe, is where The Macarena Dance fits into the picture. The dance itself is so simple anyone who can count to 16 can do it. (See below.) It is particularly susceptible to deconstruction. The dance steps become absurd when you write them down. But at just the right point in the dance, you get to do a little of that "shake your money maker" thing, thus ensuring its popularity. The two guys that make up Los Del Rio are pushing 50. And if you have ever seen them, you know that they aren't exactly athletic superstars. No backflips or flying leaps will be seen from these guys any time soon. So if these guys can do The Macarena anyone can. This is very important. When a song can be danced to by retirees and Dance Divas alike, you've got a huge potential market on your hands. Every culture on the planet dances. And until recently, dancing has always been a formalized ritual. There have always been "steps" to it. Whether you're talking about ballroom waltzes, Indian belly dances, the Achey-Brakey, or Contra line dances, dancing has always been a formal, ritualized means of physical expression. It's only since the dawn of Rock music and all its descendent genres that dancing has gone to totally free-form movement. But let's face it. The vast majority of us aren't comfortable enough with our bodies and how they move to improvise on a crowded dance floor. We feel like bumbling idiots in these situations. People need ritualized dance steps to relieve us of this burden and make dancing fun again. The Macarena Dance fills this need for millions of people worldwide. The fundamental ingredient that makes The Macarena such a successful craze is that people see these two middle aged anti-superstars with obviously unspectacular physiques having fun doing a simple dance with style and grace and dignity and they think to themselves, "Hey, I could do that, and it looks like fun." And they do. And it is. And they buy records. And they are happy. And Los Del Rio are happy. And BMG's worldwide marketing campaign is a huge success. And the universal cultural phenomena of dancing is continued. The Macarena Dance Beat 1: R arm in front of you, palm down Beat 2: L arm in front of you, palm down Beat 3: Turn R palm up Beat 4: Turn L palm up Beat 5: R hand grasps inside of L elbow Beat 6: L hand grasps inside of R elbow Beat 7: R hand behind back of neck Beat 8: L hand behind back of neck Beat 9: R hand on L front pants pocket Beat 10: L hand on R front pants pocket Beat 11: R hand on R back pants pocket Beat 12: L hand on L back pants pocket Beat 13: Move your butt to the Left Beat 14: Move your butt to the Right Beat 15: Move your butt to the Left Beat 16: Clap and turn 90 degrees to the right. Jumping on this step is optional. Repeat the same 16 beats 4 times. ==================================== Current Events Lack of Advertising Sometimes the biggest stories in the newspaper aren't the most interesting ones. Sometimes all it takes is a couple of sentences to convey worlds of information. Take for example the following newswire story published in the Raleigh News and Observer: Port Washington - Sixteen year old Jacob Kallas was arrested, cuffed, and jailed overnight because he didn't have the paperwork for his shots. Jacob's mother, Janet Kallas, admits she ignored two court orders to provide her son's new school with proof of immunizations, which he did receive. "I didn't realize we live in such a police state," she said. Seems that someone down at the Ad Council isn't doing their job very well. ==================================== True Story Pigs In A Blanket As a part-time social critic, it is my duty to always be on the lookout for incongruities in the social fabric of our culture. It's my job to ferret out inconsistency and expose it to the light of day for all to see. Not as a muckraker, but as someone truly interested in seeing the improvement of American pop culture. I offer insights and hopefully constructive criticism in kindest spirit, with nothing but society's best interests, with the sincere hopes that others will take my observations and put them to good use. But sometimes people just aren't ready to hear criticism. Sometimes they just aren't ready for change. Sometimes even the sincerest criticism is not appreciated. For example, 1:00 in the morning, sitting in an International House of Pancakes, is not exactly the best time to strike up a conversation with a waitress about linguistic mistakes on the menu. As is so often the case with me, I had to learn this the hard way. Every now and then I get a carbohydrate craving that can only be satisfied with a stack of pancakes and maybe a side order of hash-browns. And when it hits, there's nothing else to do but head out to the local IHOP and feast. Thank goodness they are open 24 hours a day. So a few weeks ago, I found myself sitting in the IHOP in the middle of the night studying the menu. My main task of course was to try to find a way to maximize the number of pancakes I could get for my money. I was experimenting with various combinations of side orders and specials of the day and all-night breakfast deals. But on a subconscious level, the social critic in my head was also studying the menu. Noticing how it was laid out, how the descriptions of each item were instructive as well as appealing. Well, it's just what we social critics do. We can't stop doing it. One of the things I noticed about the IHOP menu, to its credit, is that the pictures on it are tasteful and inviting. This is in sharp contrast to the Waffle House menu which apparently assumes that a large percentage of its customers can't read. The Waffle House menu has big pictures of everything they offer plainly drawn out, like a diagram in a dictionary or a technical manual. The obvious intent was to give people an opportunity to point to what they want. But the IHOP menu pictures are more aesthetic, in an attempt to give you the impression of a warm, cozy restaurant. My eye wandered across an item on the menu called "Pigs in a blanket," which was described as a dish of four link sausages wrapped in a warm, buttermilk pancake. Now like I said, my primary goal was maximize my pancake intake. So at first this didn't seem to be such a good deal for my purposes. While the sausage sounded OK, one pancake simply wasn't going to do. But then I got to wondering, "how can they wrap four sausages in one pancake?" Like I said, it was 1:00 a.m. and I wasn't thinking quite as sharply as I usually do. Of course they couldn't wrap four sausages in a single pancake. They probably meant that each sausage was wrapped individually in its own, personalized, blanket. So the main faculties of my mind were satisfied and moved on to the rest of the menu. But at this point the social critic in me woke up and said, "heyyyy, wait a minute. How could this menu have been reworded so that there would be no confusion about what exactly IHOP was offering?" The problem with "Pigs in a blanket" is, of course, that the word pigs is plural while the word blanket is singular. So the strict interpretation of the words would have to lead you to conclude that there is only one "blanket," i.e. pancake, involved. Ones' first inclination would be to rename the dish "pigs in blankets" so that it would be clear that there are multiple pancakes involved. Better, but something about this solution still bothered my inner social critic. About then the waitress came over to take my order, so I asked her, "What exactly comes with pigs in a blanket. Does it come with just one pancake?" "Oh no," she said, "four pancakes and four link sausages." I paused a few seconds to absorb and analyze this new information. The waitress, bless her heart, waited. "Well, how does it work?" I asked, "do you lay all the pigs down together and then cover them all up with the four pancakes? Or is each pig wrapped individually with its own pancake so that there is a one to one association between each pancake and each pig?" She looked at me. Politely. "Each one is individually wrapped." I had to think about this some more. How could you rename this dish so that this was clear? "But I can ask the cook to rearrange them if you like," she offered, "Does it really matter?" "Ummmm," I replied. "I guess not." "Good then," she said, "Pigs in a blanket coming up." And off she went. I hadn't actually intended to order that. I was just curious. But I didn't have the heart to bother her anymore. While I was waiting for my "Pigs in a blanket" to arrive, I couldn't stop thinking about this. I still wasn't satisfied. And I kept thinking about the question the waitress asked me, "Does it really matter?" Something about the tone of her voice when she said that kept coming back to me. No, it doesn't matter how the dish is constructed. At least not in terms of what you get for your money. Whether those link sausages are huddled together at the bottom of my plate under a stack of 4 pancakes or whether they are "individually wrapped" really doesn't matter that much. And then it hit me. But the name of the dish _implies_ that it matters. What's needed is a name for the dish that makes the blanket part subservient to the pig part so that it doesn't raise these issues at all. And that's when I had my brilliant insight. When the waitress came back with my meal, I was ready. As she was putting down my plate, I said to her, "Ya know, I think this dish should be called `Pigs blanketed' so that there's no implication about how the plate is arranged. Like you said, it doesn't really matter." "What?" she asked. "You know, like `attorneys general.' You don't say `attorney generals' or `attorneys generals' You say `attorneys general'. The `general' is a descriptive word that modifies the main word `attorney'. So `pigs blanketed' would do the same thing. It would avoid confusion." "Enjoy your meal sir." Maybe she was just really busy that night. ==================================== About Stuck In Traffic Stuck In Traffic is a monthly magazine dedicated to evaluating current events, examining cultural phenomena, and telling true stories. Why "Stuck In Traffic"? Because getting stuck in traffic is good for you. It's an opportunity to think, ponder, and reflect on all things, from the personal to the global. As Robert Pirsig wrote in _Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance_, "Let's consider a reevaluation of the situation in which we assume that the stuckness now occurring, the zero of consciousness, isn't the worst of all possible situations, but the best possible situation you could be in. After all, it's exactly this stuckness that Zen Buddhists go to so much trouble to induce...." Submissions Submissions to Stuck In Traffic are always welcome. If you have something on your mind or a personal story you'd like to share, please do. You don't have to be a great writer to be published here, just sincere. Contact Information All queries, submissions, subscription requests, comments, and hate-mail about Stuck In Traffic should be sent to Calvin Stacy Powers preferably via E-mail (powers@interpath.com) or by mail (2012 Talloway Drive, Cary, NC USA 27511). Copyright Notice Stuck In Traffic is published and copyrighted by Calvin Stacy Powers who reserves all rights. Individual articles are copyrighted by their respective authors. Unsigned articles are authored by Calvin Stacy Powers. Permission is granted to redistribute and republish Stuck In Traffic for noncommercial purposes as long as it is redistributed as a whole, in its entirety, including this copyright notice. For permission to republish an individual article, contact the author. 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